KWONOTN
by saccharine.rush
Summary: While Eriol wanted acceptance, Tomoyo longed for freedom. In the middle of their own separate worlds, they are bound to find each other.
1. february 13, 11

The customary **A/N** and foreword: I've rewritten this fic (I really wondered how many times I could edit this) just because I thought I made a really lousy (understatement of the year) version the first time. Changed the point of view, too, in an attempt to be consistent and unbiased. My writing style had somewhat changed (in my opinion), and it is another excuse for me to remake the plot and develop the characters better and to make this fic more personal. Will be using more familiar names from now on and will limit the use of Japanese terms. People have complained, and lately, I complained about them myself when I read my first draft again. LOL I sincerely thank those who have reviewed and waited for updates of this fic. And it took me...more than TWO YEARS to repost! O.o I couldn't continue the old version because-you've guessed it right-I have also forgotten how I should end it. LOL Now, enjoy, people. And, yeah, disclaimers apply.

* * *

_Chapter 1: I was told that the calm season is over_

(Autumn)

The slight shuffle echoed in that relatively empty room as the only moving form shifted to the right then to the left of the futon for the umpteenth time that night. The heavy blanket had already been tossed to the side in her exasperation, a tangled heap that had momentarily coiled with the right long sleeve of her _yukata_. And on the floor was a mass of mess, a miserable clutter that ironically reflected the disarray of brittle emotions in her solitary world. A few minutes later, the figure gracelessly rolled off the mattress, and at the action the long, inky tresses that spilled on the white pillows caught a trickle of the full moon's light which managed to pierce through the only window in that room.

Like a bleak warning the digital clock on the floor announced the time in bright red and glaring numbers. _Two in the morning_, it said.

There were no sounds that could be heard in this dead night, not even the rhythm of shallow breathing, except perhaps that dull pulse, that steady quake of a distant drum in _Daidōji Tomoyo_'s ears.

"_Mō_!" The word escaped her restless thoughts and slightly parted lips faster than she could stop herself from voicing her irritation.  
_  
What am I doing? Am I already giving up? Is this as far as I can go?_ Her thoughts went on miserably as her mood plummeted further like lead plunging deeper in a bare, dark well. The dimly lit room wasn't enough to stimulate her to sleep, and this frustration over her current state that plagued her thoughts and skirted at the seams of consciousness during the day was keeping her wide awake tonight. Fatigue couldn't find its way to the edges of slumber yet even when it was wearing her out.  
_  
But choosing this has been my decision. I shouldn't be complaining. I should be used to this. This was what I asked for._

And it had only been two months since that fateful day. What she was going through now was nothing compared to that dreadful life.  
_  
Wasn't it_?  
_  
Tomoyo_ never knew this freedom could taste so sweet and bitter at the same time. The darkness was closing in on her, suffocating, and threatening to consume her whole. Things were confusing her further in these inescapable shadows.

A weak breeze faintly fluttered the gauzy curtains as this young woman looked on. Despite the biting chill she couldn't be bothered with the cold. She was either too weary to even make a movement or just apathetic to do so.

"Will I ever be alright?" She asked herself out loud, and again she surprised herself with this impulsive outburst.

The girl hadn't noticed she had started crying until a tear traced her face and slid to the corner of her mouth, the taste of saline lingering there for a moment and mixing with the flavor of her misery. Not a second later, _Tomoyo, _frustrated with herself all over again, was angrily rubbing her face with the back of her hand. Her face stung from that vigorous friction by her hand, and it matched the ache in her chest only for a bit. Yet with this bitterness she knew she couldn't afford self-pity nor regret. Not this time when what remained of her pride wouldn't permit it.  
_  
It's a weakness! It's stupid! I can't allow this_—

"_Daijōbu desu ka_."

A startled gasp passed her lips as the question cut off her train of thoughts, the unlikely question pulling her out of her private conflicts.

However, the surprise dissolved somewhat quickly, and the girl's unfocused gaze lazily fell by the door where a lanky figure of a man was rooted.

She had expected to see the old dorm manager, _Wei_, but that deep baritone only belonged to the person who lived right across her room.

"_Daijōbu desu ka Daidōji-san_."

The voice was more pronounced now, and it hinted of something that _Tomoyo_ couldn't place her finger on. Concern? She didn't think the man was capable of that emotion. Not when that stoic face of his would always mirror his general boredom and shrouded disdain.

She didn't feel obliged to answer and was tempted to feign sleep, but the indispensable courtesy won over. Though his words barely touched her, _Hiiragizawa Eriol_'s unmoving silhouette was oddly comforting.

"Did I wake you, _Hiiragizawa-san_?" She finally said, realizing her mistake when she sat up. Her wispy voice would betray her disposition if she wasn't cautious enough, so she resolved to a low whisper. "_Sumimasen_. It was inconsiderate of me."

Somehow this young man seemed to carefully consider what to say next as he stood there frozen in the same spot for a few painful seconds. Both of them realized she hadn't answered his question.

Despite the shadows that painted the visitor's outline, _Tomoyo_ could feel _Eriol_'s unyielding stare, and how it almost bore holes on her head at the intensity of it. But why he stubbornly lingered there was really the least of her worries. She wished he just left her to herself.

"_Nai nai_. I...have been awake," came his reply, his low voice resonating in her head like flowing stream that marginally calmed the agitated monsters in her head.

Either person didn't make any more unnecessary movements even if they allowed this conversation to thrive a little.

"_Sō ka_," the girl allowed the comment to pass just to fill the silence. She didn't mean to sound a little grave (or maybe she did), but the air surrounding them had shifted, and the mounting awkwardness was not helping them at all._ Tomoyo_ unconsciously started blaming _Eriol_ about the situation. He knew nothing of her life, and this man really didn't have to barge in on her like this, not in a time when she needed saving from herself anyway.

"Forgive me, _Daidōji-san_. It was very rude of me to have disturbed you." _Eriol_ executed an awkward bow and turned away just as immediately.  
_  
Tomoyo_ picked up on his words and why he chose to say _you_ instead of _your sleep_.

"I am perfectly alright," the girl murmured to herself, stopping him from sliding the rice paper door into its place. She was convincing herself alone of course, and predictably the young man would not mention that if he had noticed it at all.

"_Yokatta_," he couldn't help but say, sounding reassured at some point.

"_Jaa_. _Oyasumi nasai Hiiragizawa-san_." Resolved to dismiss the man _Tomoyo_ had abruptly rolled to the opposite side again. Her vision danced for a moment and whole body ached at the sudden effort, yet she was still able to drag the mattress back to her body. This action of trying to hide and protect herself from this intruder was not lost on _Eriol__. _

It was already fifteen minutes past two o'clock. She had to wake up again in three hours, and just thinking that the exhausted _Daidōji Tomoyo_ rapidly lost all feeling in her limbs and began to drift off to sleep. The curious man on her doorway and his unlikely question were easily forgotten.

"_Oyasumi Daidōji-san_."

She didn't hear him of course. For the first time since she left that house she hadn't dreamed about unkind hands that grabbed at her and sunless closets that kept her in for days.

* * *

Quick notes:

**futon** - bed made up of mattress and blanket with mat underneath; usually set on the floor

**yukata** - resembles a kimono, but worn as a sundress

**mō** - expression of exasperation

**daijōbu desu ka** - "Are you alright?" (I've noticed most questions in Japanese in Romaji form don't usually end with a question mark.)

**-san**- suffix that denotes Mr./Mrs./Ms.

**sumimasen** - "Pardon me." or "Excuse me."

**nai** - expresses negation, can be taken as "No."

**sō ka** - "Is that so?"

**gomen nasai** - "I'm sorry."

**yokatta**- "I'm glad."

**jaa** - expresses end of a topic or indication of changing a topic

**oyasumi nasai** - "Good night."

**

* * *

kisetsu wa odayaka ni owari wo tsugeta ne** - "The season has ended so quietly."


	2. 2

**No more A/Ns, please:** LOL I'm sorry. **These things**, I know, are annoying. But I just need to explain why I've used dates for chapter titles. That's to make your life and mine easy. I've always wanted to know when the last chapter was updated or added, and there is no way of telling which chapter was the last you've read unless you've kept tabs on it, which in most cases you don't. It gets harder when there are more than 5 chapters released, and you've read the last release months ago. You get lost somewhere. T.T Some authors are kind enough to put them in A/Ns but not everybody reads those (most esp. me), so the date thing is kinda useless. Wait. Did you, guys, even get what I was trying to explain? LOL

Thanks to those who have read, and most esp. those who have reviewed. :)

* * *

2nd Act, Autumn

* * *

In the sleepless night, I sing this song alone.

Together with the blowing wind I fly, riding on my thoughts.

- Iwao Junko, _Yoru no Uta_

* * *

If there was one sound that she was already so used to it would be the echoed rumbling of the bullet trains. The ground beneath her feet didn't quiver but they might as well had trembled with the noise that ricocheted in her head.

_I can't see the sun_.

She couldn't place that certain caged feeling inside her, couldn't understand why she was still feeling this way.

_What am I doing here?_

The young woman was staring ahead when for a split second she suddenly couldn't recognize the bright colors of this crowded room, the happy and excited chatter that drowned all other sounds, and that image in the smoked window pane that stared back at her.

"_Nee Tomoyo-neechan_." Familiar small hands and bright blue eyes jerked her back to consciousness and recognition.

The little boy of five years old fisted her skirt, tugging on her clothes excitedly to the direction of the piano in the far corner where other children had already positioned themselves.

_Tomoyo _made an effort to beam at the child.

_I'm alright, _the girl convinced herself as she widened her smile that didn't reach her eyes.

Most of the children at this time of the day would be running around in the daycare center, but today just like yesterday, they had their full attention on _Tomoyo_ and the piano.

"Play that song you taught _Noe _yesterday!" The boy toothily commanded which made his babysitter laugh in amusement.

"Only if you say please, _Noe-chan_," _Tomoyo _admonished playfully as she anyway let him drag her with him.

"Please." At this he matched the plea with a look that was part pleading and part impatient.

The other children where becoming restless even when she finally took her place on the piano, and only calmed down when the first light notes floated in the air.

* * *

Somehow the mess in the main room had influenced the arrangement of things in the lounge, and it had taken her longer to get dressed for her next job much to _Tomoyo_'s chagrin.

_Not that arrangement mattered much these days_. _My life is crazier by the second, _the girl scoffed, finding herself uncharacteristically sarcastic.

"_Tomoyo-san_?"

How it was easy for her to pretend that things were alright for her.

"Is something the matter, _Rika-senpai_?" _Tomoyo _curiously asked the woman with a docile face.

_Rika Sasaki _wasn't really any older than her, but the former was the niece of the manager of this subway daycare center, a senior of sorts, and _Tomoyo _thought it just appropriate to call her such.

"Actually, I was going to ask you that," _Rika _said quietly, cautiously taking her place beside _Tomoyo_ and helping her keep the remaining aprons that were lying unattended on the table.

Though she was composed enough not to ask pointblank, _Tomoyo _couldn't help but look up and meet _Rika_'s warm eyes.

"You seem distracted today, _Tomoyo-san_." The other woman's look was suddenly somewhat concerned.

It was just then that the former heiress broke off her gaze. Was it out of embarrassment or guilt, _Tomoyo_ couldn't tell.

"I was thinking of homework." She just had to lie as well, looking away and pretending to be busy with buttoning up her shirt. "I figured that I'd have to stay up late again to work on it."

A small nod of assent was the only reply she got from _Rika_. If the _senpai _had seen through the lie, she chose not to comment on it. Her reserved and empathetic reaction was typical for the cinnamon-eyed woman, and there was always that air of formality in her no matter who she was speaking with, consequently she wasn't one to prod. Her next statement would come out as a surprise for _Tomoyo_, though.

"That song just a while ago...I like it," the brunette warmly remarked. "Who taught you that?"

The children they were tasked to baby-sit for the day must not have understood what the song was about, and probably even _Rika Sasaki _herself. _Tomoyo Daidōji _had very fond memories of it.

For the first time that day the young woman with the most striking amethyst eyes gave a genuine, unreserved smile.

"My father."

* * *

Quick notes:

**nee **– "Say..."

**-neechan **– big sister

**-chan **– suffix used on little kids, on close friends usually girls, or for a term of endearment

**-senpai **– a title that suggests that the addressee is one's senior in a group or organization


	3. 3

Act 3, Autumn

It wasn't unusual to see _Eriol_ early in the music school, and particularly not out of the ordinary that the dark-haired young man was standing outside one of the piano rooms, leaning on the balcony railings comfortably in the late afternoon.

_I still have twenty minutes_, he thought to himself serenely as he watched cello students, walking leisurely on the marble pavement with their peers and making their way to the main gate.

It was safe to say that one of _Eriol Hiiragizawa_'s hobbies included observing people, their dispositions, tendencies and ticks. For him there was something interesting about knowing what individuals are constrained to do in different circumstances. The habit also made him feel wholly invisible especially when these people didn't know he was watching.

Music, ironically, wasn't something that could make him invisible. Since he was young, even before he could play the piano, he always stood out. Having one of the most talented pianists of his generation as his father just made matters worse. _Eriol_ couldn't draw himself out of _Clow Reed_'s shadow no matter how hard he fought against it.

The familiar sight of the darkest hair he had ever seen in his life pulled him out of his reverie. The figure disappeared in the entrance below as fast as she materialized, leaving a trail of mystery behind her.

_Daidōji Tomoyo_, he figured, was just like him.

_Why are we still here, Daidōji-san?_ He asked in his mind. The answer didn't come as expected, but he was grateful of the cool, comforting autumn wind that swept his bangs away from his closed lids.

Then the young man heard it.

_Feux follets?_

He knew it was a particularly difficult piece to play, and wondered who in this music school that only taught children the basics had the talent to even execute the piece correctly.

_Eriol_ wanted to know who was playing on the piano, but stepping in the practice room would just distract the pianist's concentration.

_It can only be one of the senior instructors_.

The tall curtains of the French windows that obscured his sight, though almost as flimsy as gauze, were challenging him further.

The swift double notes were played rather heavily, as if the pianist was more troubled than the supposed whimsical nature of the piece. Only when the pianist sat straight from an uncomfortable crouched position that he realized he was listening to his dorm mate playing Liszt all this time. Her long, curling hair looked darker from where he stood, a stark, inky contrast to the ivory walls behind her and her porcelain-like face.

She had stopped playing a long time ago but _Eriol_ still couldn't tear his gaze off her unguarded face, drawn to the secrecy of that anxious expression.

_So_ _beautiful_.

His thoughts must have given him away because the girl had stood from her seat at once, a gasp falling out of her delicate mouth.

"I am so sorry. I didn't know there was someone else in the room." Her voice was just as melodious as her music.

"There wasn't. I was out in the balcony," _Eriol_ opposed calmly before finally allowing himself inside.

Peaceful sapphire met restless amethyst.

The shock on her face when she recognized who the person was behind the over-sized windows was much more distinct than she had probably realized.

"_Hiiragizawa-san_."

It rather came out as a confused statement in his ears but the young man couldn't tell how his name could still sound beautiful.

"_Konnichiwa Daidōji-san_," _Eriol_ greeted her with a slight bow. He didn't want to startle her or embarrass her in any way, but by saying it just made her snap inside.

"_Sumimasen_. I didn't mean to. I didn't know this was your practice room," _Tomoyo_ went on frantically. Her luxurious dark hair fell in cascades as she bent over in apology and misplaced guilt. "I am not supposed to be here. I should leave. The children are waiting for me."

He couldn't tell if it was the way her eyes were shining, or how her gentle face, usually devoid of real emotion, looked that moment that attracted him to her. For whatever reason, he just couldn't look away now.

Before _Eriol_ could react the young woman was quick to gather her things from the floor and run to the double doors.

"Forgive me for intruding, _Hiiragizawa-san_," she nervously said again as if her last two apologies weren't enough, bowing for the last time without meeting his azure eyes before closing the door behind her.

That was without a doubt the real _Tomoyo Daidōji_ talking to him, one who wasn't always drifting in and out of her mind as if she didn't really have any life in her. Whatever she was desperately trying to keep to herself must be worth uncovering.

He pressed a key with a careful finger distractedly, his own thoughts wandering to the dark-haired woman who had just left.

* * *

Quick notes:

**konichiwa **– "Good afternoon." or "Good day."

**kohai **– opposite of **senpai**, and used toward underclassmen in school and newcomers in the workplace

* * *

"Feux follets" is the fifth etude of the set of twelve Transcendental Etudes by Franz Liszt.


	4. 4

Act 4, Autumn

"_Chiharu-chan_'s at it again," a bespectacled waitress told _Tomoyo _who was diligently moving the serving dishes and teacups around amidst the confusion in the crammed restaurant kitchen.

_Aoiya _was surprisingly busy tonight even when it wasn't a weekend.

"_Eh_?"

"Look at her! She has that funny look on her face again. I think _Yamazaki-san_ is apparently dense. He should have already realized _Chiharu-chan _is in love with him. She's shamelessly flirting with him. It's a tragedy, _Tomoyo-chan_!" It wasn't really stated in a disgusted tone of voice, but _Yanagizawa Naoko _disapproved such display with a shaking head.

"You don't really mean that, _Naoko-san._" _Tomoyo_ instantly changed her mind when she saw the approaching girl in pigtails blushing to herself.

Together the two girls burst in laughter just as _Chiharu _returned to the kitchen, apparently gushing.

"Did you know that _Takashi-kun_ plays the violin?" She remarked dreamily, eyes still on a particular customer in the dining room.

"When ever did you start calling him by his first name?"

_Chiharu Mihara _hadn't heard _Naoko_'s question however, and her dazed expression only made the other girls laugh again.

The always beaming _Takashi Yamazaki _had been a regular in the restaurant ever since _Tomoyo _started working there. Once or twice a month he would tag a friend or two along, and tonight he had with him _Syaoran Li _and her enigmatic dorm mate, _Eriol_.

_Hiiragizawa-san is just everywhere these days_, _Tomoyo _uncomfortably reflected to herself as she placed the final china on the salver. _Tomoeda _was anyway a small town, just in the quieter outskirts of _Osaka, _but the girl thought it was still strange seeing the azure-eyed young man in places she worked in. _Eriol _was also employed part-time in the music school as one of the senior instructors, and it was difficult to keep herself invisible. The incident in the piano room a few days ago just proved that.

"_So beautiful_..._"_

The girl may not have determined what made him say so but there was something peculiar in the unforeseen declaration that triggered a striking blush on _Tomoyo_'s pale face.

_He found me_.

Her bewildered thoughts suddenly strayed to the day when she first came to _Tomoeda_. It was just after wandering for so long when she found herself standing outside the imposing gates of a dwelling. In the late afternoon the beating rain had already soaked her clothes through, and in her exhausted, distracted state _Tomoyo _didn't realize this, didn't even know where she was exactly and how she got there, not until somebody came to shield her from the downpour, offering her an umbrella, and, in some way, so much more. It was just then she stirred to look at something else besides the void she was seeing in front of her.

Coldest amethyst met warmest sapphire.

"You look red, _Tomoyo-chan_," _Chiharu _observed worriedly. "_Genki desu ka_."

_Naoko _had looked over her shoulder with a rather interested face as she received another order of _sukiyaki _and _miso _soup from the cook.

_What is happening to me?_

Though she was able to explain that the confined heat in the kitchen had affected her disposition, the other girls' concern only made her stutter her reply.

"I'll take this to table seven," _Tomoyo_ volunteered unexpectedly, gracefully seizing the serving platter on the counter before _Naoko _or _Chiharu _could say anything more.

* * *

"_Chotto matte_...you dragged us all the way from _Osaka_ just to show us this?" The amber-eyed Chinese incredulously asked the smiling man across him just after their curiously blushing waitress in a _kimono_ left with the salver.

The ginger shell of the instrument was polished beautifully, and it shone with a subtle luster as _Yamazaki _held the violin out for his companions to see.

"She's not a Stradivarius, but she sounds just like one," he said distractedly, obsessively stroking the shiny body and neck of the instrument. "Isn't she beautiful?"

_Eriol _would've snorted if it was in his character to do such thing.

"She? _Hiiragizawa_!" _Syaoran _would have slapped his forehead if it was in him to react that way as well. He had previously thought _Yamazaki _had a strange character with his uncanny attachment to astrology and paranormal, but now he realized the violinist was just plain unbelievable.

"Does she have a name then, _Yamazaki-san_?" _Eriol _proceeded to humor _Yamazaki_ just to tease _Syaoran _further with such pointless questions.

"The tea is getting cold, _Hiiragizawa_," the Chinese told him with an unsuppressed groan.

"_Mihara-chan_," _Yamazaki _answered with a seemingly different glow on his face this time.

Before _Eriol _could say anything more to taunt him, _Syaoran _handed a fresh cup of tea to distract the bespectacled man.

While they were finally peacefully enjoying their tea, a commotion two tables away had seized _Eriol_'s attention.

* * *

She really must be preoccupied lately, too out of her mind in fact to have caused such accident that she could have avoided if she had paid enough attention to her surroundings.

The burning sensation on her arm made her visibly wince but she had to keep the spilled _miso_ soup from completely soaking the tablecloth, and not to mention, her blunder had also drenched the customer's expensive coat.

"You stupid bitch!" The middle-aged _gaijin_ bellowed another set of expletives, face reddening in fury.

"I am really sorry, mister," _Tomoyo _apologized agitatedly for the third time, consciously dabbing the man's clothes with a table napkin, her pain forgotten for a moment.

The other patrons were getting restless with the uproar that the tall American was making, and her last apology was ineffective as the first time she said it.

"Let me pay for the damage, mister," the girl offered in a last ditch effort to appease the enraged man.

"You can't do that with the type of work you do, bitch," he rejoined as he yanked _Tomoyo_'s blistered arm. "But I can see that you can speak English quite well, and you are quite pretty for a careless whore. We can talk about how you can pay me in my hotel."

The malicious context in his words made her shiver inside and reduced her esteem to bits.

"You—"

"Excuse me. Can I help you?" Another customer came in time to interrupt before she could make any more damage by cursing on the American's face.

It wasn't until she blinked her tears away did she recognize that regal face.

_He found me_. The statement had somehow become the mantra of the evening.

"Are you the manager?" The American rudely demanded.

"No."

It irritated the man that _Eriol _could still push his glasses to the bridge of his nose in the most unruffled way he knew, and it annoyed him as well that his towering built didn't intimidate _Eriol _at all. The younger man was anyway almost as tall as him.

"Then you have no business with me."

"Actually, I have," _Eriol _responded evenly with a daunting glint in those azure orbs as he paced closer to the incensed customer. "The waitress is mine."

_Tomoyo _wasn't sure if she could turn any redder than she did now.

Confused amethyst met peaceful sapphire.

The tension only dwindled slightly when the manager of the restaurant arrived in the scene at last, apologizing again and again with a bow and promising to take care of whatever damage was caused to the American.

The foreigner was too irate to negotiate despite the manager's attempts to speak his language, and he left the restaurant still fuming.

"It was all my fault, _taicho_. _Mōshiwake gozaimasen_." Her remorse was all but spent, and for a minute she didn't care if she would be dismissed for her irresponsibility.

"Accidents happen all the time, _Daidōji-san_. And this is just your first after all so don't think too much about it," the manager said sympathetically, waving a hand to fend off _Naoko _and _Chiharu_ who looked like they were going to dart to _Tomoyo _that instant.

"Where does it hurt?" _Eriol _asked her when the girl cringed in a poorly concealed pain.

"This is nothing, _Hiiragizawa-san_," _Tomoyo _insisted, hiding her blister with her _kimono _sleeve.

"You've burned yourself, young lady," her superior told her firmly. "I'm letting you off early tonight so you could treat that arm. That's an order."

"But—"

"I'll take her home, _taicho_. We live in the same building anyway," _Eriol _presented himself to _Tomoyo_'s surprise.

The manager only excused himself with a bow after he expressed his thank you to _Eriol_.

"_Taicho_! Please!"

Despite the waitress' plea he wouldn't hear any of it as he walked away.

The girl rather liked a retribution for the whole disaster than suffer a potential awkward moment with _Eriol Hiiragizawa_.

"Would you like me to get your things for you, _Daidōji-san_?"

"_Yamazaki _is doing that now, _Hiiragizawa," Syaoran _said as he bowed to _Tomoyo _in greeting. "Why don't we wait for him outside?"

When the three of them stepped out of the restaurant, it was just then that _Tomoyo _found her voice again.

"You didn't have to do it," she nearly murmured the words, suddenly shaking as if her remaining energy was suddenly drained from her.

"Would you rather be dragged to his hotel then?" _Eriol _countered nonchalantly, watching _Syaoran _standing by the road to flag them a taxi.

"I could handle it myself." Her _senpai_ would have believed her if she didn't sound so fragile when she said it.

_Tomoyo _could have said a word of appreciation, but she was a strange, stubborn woman first and a proud one in an awkward time. Thankfully, _Eriol _did not have the heart to argue with her further.

Both had noticed that it was taking _Yamazaki _a while to claim her things.

A swift gust came hurling suddenly, swaying the boughs of the yellowing ginkgoes that were lining the sides of the street and sweeping some dried leaves to their direction. And not a second later the howling sound surged in the silent roads.

"You have impressive English, _Daidōji-san_." He couldn't help but voice out his earlier observation.

"I only said a few words."

"You're obviously well learned."

"It's not what you think."

Before they could start another debate, _Yamazaki _burst out of the door with a violin case strapped on his back and her bag in his hands.

"I'm sorry for making you wait this long, _Hiiragizawa-kun_. They were too busy, and then nobody could find the—_anō..._did I interrupt something?"

But just as _Tomoyo _could say a rebuttal, _Syaoran _had already hailed them a taxi.

* * *

Quick notes:

**-kun **– suffix used at the end of boys' names to express familiarity or endearment and sometimes used by men among friends, and honorific used by teachers for students regardless of gender

**sukiyaki **– meat and vegetables cooked in a soy-based sauce

**miso **_– _bean paste

**chotto matte **– "Wait a minute." (literally "Wait a little.")

**kimono **– traditional Japanese garment worn by females

**taicho **– superior officer

**mōshiwake gozaimasen **– "I have no excuse." or "I am very sorry."

**anō** – "Umm..."

* * *

A **Stradivarius** is a bowed instrument famous for the quality of their sound. The name "Stradivarius" has also become a superlative applied to designate excellence. -wikipedia :D


	5. 5

Act 5, Autumn

The ends of the ashen scarf on her neck flailed in the strong wind as she made the unusual route home.

They really needed to be more discreet about following her around, less conspicuous perhaps about their distinctive appearance. These people couldn't blend in the crowd even if they tried with those identical dark suits they were always wearing. _Tomoyo _would be aware of those uniforms anywhere.

The young woman was tempted to make a wild run to the other side of the street and would have actually done so if the traffic wasn't as hectic as this day. Eventually, the late autumn rains had started to pour, torrential and troublesome to the swarming commoners in the sidewalk. It was starting to grow colder as well.

In her racing mind she supposed that she could still lose them if she would take that turn to the bazaar in the corner. But just before she could make another step, one of the uniformed men blocked her way, effectively intercepting her strategy just in time. Soon there were two more who had joined in, bowing in courtesy to the former heiress.

"You've been trailing me all day. I took the train more than once and yet you still managed to catch up. I must say you've impressed me." In spite of the ironic remark, she bowed back to them.

"_Daidōji-sama _wants to speak with _ojōsama_."

_Tomoyo_'s eyes turned into narrow slits instinctively.

"What else does she want from me? Was walking out of that house not clear enough for her? I'm simply not an heiress anymore."

The memory of that night suddenly came crashing back at the same time as the thunder rolled in the horizon. _Tomoyo _knew that the moment she stepped out of the room, she officially renounced her identity as an heiress, and perhaps, even as an overly subservient daughter.

_Sonomi Daidōji _would not be the master of her own life.

_Never again_.

"We do not know the reason. But, please, come with us. Mistress is waiting in the car."

To know the matriarch had followed her around only gave her the impression that what she was going to speak to her with must be of grave importance.

"And if I refuse?"

Her mother's guards could only look at each other before they could respond to _Tomoyo_.

"We do not want to result to force, _ojōsama_," somebody finally replied but the former heiress knew the answer even before one of them opened his mouth.

* * *

The widowed leader of the _Daidōji _corporation never lost that scowl on her face even when she laid her sharp eyes on _Tomoyo_ again. There was neither warmth nor longing in her curt greeting—the only civil way she knew when acknowledging her estranged daughter.

"I've made a mistake in just watching you turn your back on me that night. I am willing to forget about the ingratitude you've demonstrated months ago, _Tomoyo, _to set my pride aside only if you return to _Osaka _with me and forget this whole independence-nonsense," _Sonomi _stated evenly and almost without offense. Unperturbed, she turned to watch the building storm behind the opalescent windows of her luxurious limousine as if her mind was trapped in an illusion of a serene mid-afternoon tea time.

But of course, _Tomoyo _knew better than to succumb so easily. Behind the matriarch's carefully chosen words and deceptive body language were hidden demands she'd rather not think of at the moment.

"So that you can control me again? I'd rather starve than give up this freedom," her daughter retorted daringly, amethyst orbs flashing furiously in suppressed enmity. Months ago she would not have said these words out of sheer terror of her mother's reaction, but after the last straw of tolerance was spent, after that brutal beating she received for refusing that ridiculously impossible command, she simply shattered and unexpectedly found the nerve to retaliate. It was about time that she did anyway. However, the _Daidōji _mistress had not seen that coming, knowing that the submissive and reserved _Tomoyo _had never fought back at all and would never do so before.

_Sonomi _abruptly shifted from her seemingly lethargic position, painfully wrenching a handful of black hair. The irises of her dark heliotrope eyes seemed to have dilated all of a sudden.

_Tomoyo _let out a surprised cry of pain. _Sonomi_'s face was too near to her own that she could feel the hitched, overwrought breathing on her skin.

"Then I'll make sure you starve to death," her mother whispered menacingly to her ear before she soundly slapped _Tomoyo_'s face. "And when you do, you'll come crawling back to me."

The former heiress would not remember how she managed to escape from her crazed mother's hold and the bewildered men in uniform standing out of the car, not until she would reach the nearest train station to _Tomoeda_.

_

* * *

Suppi _hadn't stopped mewling since the blue-black kitten heard the musical chimes in the front door, an apparent indication that somebody had arrived or had left the apartment.

But there was nobody else besides him in the building. The chimes, more than the suddenly excited activity of the cat, suspended his harmonious warm-up on the piano.

"_Tadaima_."

_Daidōji Tomoyo_'s greeting wasn't particularly directed to him, especially when she said it in a distracted way with that small voice of hers.

"_Okaerinasai,_" her only dorm mate in sight anyway greeted her back, claiming the energized fur ball in his hands before it could get any more restless on the floor.

The girl had come home utterly saturated and slightly disheveled, clothes clinging to her petite form like second skin and hair swept unevenly on one side of her pale face.

"_Wei_-_san _have been out since three o'clock, and the others are simply out for the weekend," _Eriol _supplied, feigning an afterthought and uncomfortably looking away from her figure.

_Wei _left previously for grocery shopping right after _Syaoran_ had come for a quick visit to see how his former butler was currently fairing as a dorm manager. The other dormers who lived in the second story of the building were naturally elsewhere again.

But _Tomoyo _hadn't made any reaction to this volunteered information and only walked past him, either still unfocused or simply uninterested. There was something different about her today, and _Eriol_, possibly more than anybody else she knew that moment, could sense her unspoken anxiety.

"_Daidōji-san_," he started, wanting to stop her from walking away.

The name wasn't said in a particularly distinct manner, however that actually made her cease walking temporarily.

At the small movement she managed and the slight shift of her dark tresses, his eyes couldn't leave that noticeable bruise on her cheek.

"Did something happen, _Daidōji-san_?" The question left his mouth before he could stop it.

A full minute passed before she allowed herself to stir again.

"Nothing happened, _Hiiragizawa-san_," _Tomoyo _sighed her response. She didn't even look at him like _Eriol _expected she would, eyes downcast in her jaded reply.

_Of course something happened_. _Look at her!_ His mind derisively countered for him. Nevertheless, he was fortunately considerate to other people's privacy more than anything.

The young woman murmured her excuse to leave the common room and left with a bow and a feeble _good night_.

_Eriol Hiiragizawa _and _Suppi _could only watch her turn her back to them.

* * *

Quick Notes:

-**sama** – honorific for people in higher position

**ojōsama** – young mistress

**tadaima** – "I'm home."

**okaerinasai** – "Welcome home."


	6. 6

**A/N: **Maybe you'd like to listen to Claude Debussy's **Reverie** while you read this. :D

* * *

Act 6, Autumn

It was a coincidence that _Naoko Yanagizawa _needed someone able to design her a gown and that fellow _Aoiya _waitress, _Tomoyo Daidōji, _wanted a new distraction.

"Do you seriously want to wear something like this in a wedding, _Naoko-chan_?" Amber-eyed _Chiharu _snickered at the sight of the ball gown fit for a five year old in front of them.

_An overgrown five year old girl, that is_. Their more reserved friend winced in her head and didn't dare to gape at all the orange ruffles and tulle, choosing to stick her business to the neat stacks of sketches before her that caught the morning sunlight from the ornate windows.

They were spending away their mutual rest day in the old neighborhood library that offered complimentary coffee and tea, picking out designs among the ones that _Tomoyo_ had already drafted two days ago.

"Hideous would be an understatement," _Naoko _replied as she rolled her eyes at the ball gown her aunt had sent her all the way from _Hokkaido_ to try. "This is why I commissioned _Tomoyo-san_ to draw me a decent dress. I'd like to look like a person when I actually walk down that aisle."

"But you're not the one who's getting married."

The exchange of words despite friendly in nature made the dark-haired girl cringe inwardly again. _Tomoyo _was sure that any time now the librarian, who had been frowningly glancing their side once every five minutes and sitting in the distant corner, would ask them to leave. The poor woman had already told them to keep their noise down for the second time. The banter was disturbing the other people in the library, and so _Tomoyo_ decided to divert the topic to a quieter one.

"I am still not charging you, _Naoko-san_," she said in a hushed, anyway embarrassed tone, pale cheeks stained in pink.

"_Oh_, hush. Consider it as additional income. This talent of yours shouldn't come for free, you know," the bespectacled young woman insisted lightheartedly before bringing the coffee cup to her lips again. "Didn't you mention you want to take another job? Why don't you try freelance designing?"

"That's a brilliant idea! Your designs are amazing. We'll help you look for customers, _Tomoyo-chan_. Who knows someday you might be discovered and become a top designer!"

"I'll post your designs in my blog, if it's okay with you. It'll attract potential clients."

"Japan will love you, and the whole world, too! Wouldn't that be great?"

_Tomoyo_ didn't think being exposed to public like that was a particularly good idea, not when she had sensed that she was being followed around again these days, but the hopeful look that her two new friends were giving her made her accede at last.

"I...guess." Her voice was becoming more and more distant in her own ears. She forced a convincing smile on her face.

"_Yoroshii_!" _Chiharu _threw her fist in the air before happily enclosing a mortified _Tomoyo _in a hug.

It didn't take too long for the harassed librarian to finally ask them to leave the place.

_So much for diversions_.

The former heiress must have sighed for the umpteenth time that week.

* * *

"_Did you know that Daidōji-chan is into clothes designing, too?_" _Eriol_ remembered _Wei _asking him that morning just after breakfast. "_I accidentally picked up one of her sketches on the floor while she was rushing out for school today_. _She's one talented young woman, I must say_."

In that note, the dorm manager mentioned about how late _Tomoyo _was up again. The lights in her room had been on until three in the morning, something that had been happening days after she came home one rainy afternoon looking assaulted and miserable.

"_I worry about that girl sometimes. She seems to be trying too hard too distract herself, or perhaps she's running away from something_." _Wei _had scratched his mustache at this, a habit that the old Chinese was apt to do when he was concerned about something. "_What do you think, master Eriol?_"

They weren't even friends to able to make a decent comment about _Wei_'s statement, but the dark haired pianist was perceptive enough to be aware of _Tomoyo_'s restless behavior. But no matter how hard he would try to convince himself that it was not his business to interfere in anybody's affairs, it was a bit late when he realized that he was already outside _Aoiya_, waiting for his dark-haired dorm mate to be relieved from her last part-time work. Regardless of his assurance to _Wei _that he would watch over the girl, _Eriol_ surmised he was anyway already too drawn to the masquerade that the girl liked to engage in. Somehow his attention had been on her in the last few days.

_What's one Tomoyo Daidōji doing in Tomoeda? _He questioned himself as he leaned against the cool brick wall of the flower shop beside the restaurant. The thought didn't cross his mind very often, yet he was inclined to presume that there was something more about his co-mentor in _Terada_'s music school, something like a secret that she had been running away from that was making her more and more paranoid these days.

_But everybody is running away from something, _his mind argued. _Aren't you running away from your destiny? From your father?_

"I am not running away from him, or from anything." He sounded angry and defensive, emotions that he didn't recognize right away because they were suppressed for too long. Wasn't he driving himself to the limits just to be acknowledged? _Eriol _ran a graceful hand on his face, willing the question to drift away. To calm himself, he immediately started playing Debussy's consoling music in his head, but while the melancholic Reverie flowed steadily, several images of _Tomoyo _invaded the deepest recesses of his disturbed mind. Her beautiful amethyst eyes filled his thoughts, confusing him further as the music was slowly building up in _Eriol_'s ears.

"It's not right to think about her like that," the pianist told himself, stuffing his long, cold fingers in the trench coat pockets he was wearing.

_It's not right to think about her in any way_.

Some few minutes later, the cheerful chatter of the relieved workers shattered _Eriol_'s brittle concentration.

"We did a good job tonight, _Tomoyo-chan_," that same girl, who had waited on him and his friends a week ago, said with a bow.

"You look very tired. Don't bother yourself with making sketches again tonight, okay?" The bespectacled young woman beside the girl in pigtails advised their dark-haired friend.

"_Maa maa minna-san_. Please don't worry about me anymore. A little headache is not going to slow me down." _Tomoyo_'s voice seemed more high-pitched than usual.

They said their goodbyes before they turned their separate ways in the streets. In the softness of the street lights, _Eriol _had easily seen the smile that faded in _Tomoyo_'s face the moment she made her way to the bus stop.

"You should listen to her."

The attempt to make his presence known to his _kohai _was definitely a mistake. Her startled expression bothered him as the wild, frightened look in those huge eyes pierced through his own.

"I am sorry, _Daidōji-san_. It was never my intention to scare you," he apologized, immediately concerned that he might have permanently robbed _Tomoyo_'s voice from her.

"_Hiiragizawa-san_," the young woman finally mumbled in recognition, clasping her chest with a delicately small hand. "What are you doing here?"

_Aa_..._the question of the night_. _What am I doing here?_

"I was going to catch the next bus," he lied effectively, taking his place beside the distressed girl.

"Is that so?"

It wasn't meant to be a question but the young man was biased to reply just to eliminate the growing tension between them. _Eriol_ knew he brought it upon himself, and admitted that it was anyway worth it, having confirmed that _Tomoyo _was indeed more agitated than the usual. The amethyst-eyed young woman couldn't stop staring at the darker corners of the deserted block, almost as if she was expecting somebody to materialize in the shadows.

"Did the American return to harass you, _Daidōji-san_?"

He made another effort at small talk just to ease the strain that seemed to stretch endlessly.

Perhaps it was just then that _Tomoyo Daidōji _remembered that she was not alone.

"No, he didn't," she quietly replied, looking away again, but this time out of embarrassment at having ignored her only companion in the bus stop for too long.

The _senpai _didn't realize how petite the _Aoiya _waitress really was until now. He was almost a foot taller than her, but that was a rather insignificant information to him now that his attention was again captured by the soft sheen of her long locks.

"_Hiiragizawa-san_," _Tomoyo _said unexpectedly before he could even reach and touch her mesmerizing hair. "I know it's extremely late to say this but...thank you for defending me that night. Who knows where he'll drag me if you hadn't come at all."

The words of gratitude were belated but he didn't even minded it at all. _Eriol _was too nonplussed that he could only nod back. His immediate reaction upon seeing the raven tresses was alarming him greatly, and he thought it best to keep his hands in his coat where they should belong at the moment.

_Tomoyo_, in the other hand, drifted to her own distant world again, mauve eyes somewhat glazed as she stared straight ahead. There was a slight blush on her porcelain face, a manifestation of how cold the air had become.

They talked about her treated burn for a moment, not exactly dwelling too much on details as it was an inevitable conversation. Just after the last words were said and the bus finally came, they fell in companionable silence this time.

_She really must be so tired_, _Eriol _thought to himself as he watched his dorm mate fall asleep the minute they started moving. That blush was still on her face despite the warmer temperature in the bus.

Before the bespectacled pianist could think of doing something silly again, he managed to look away from her sleeping form.

It was almost eleven in the evening when they finally reached the gates of the dormitory. Fortunately, it didn't rain like _Eriol_ rather expected, but the temperature had dropped significantly at this time of the night.

In the dark, a thin haze materialized from his companion's lips and his own.

"Are you alright, _Daidōji-san_?" The _senpai _asked her upon seeing her sway a little when she was just removing her shoes by the front door.

"I'm alright," she muttered almost automatically with a weak wave of her hand. "I'm just tired. You go right in, _senpai_. My other shoe refused to be removed."

The girl's movement was remarkably slower this time as she clumsily tugged on her loafer again, he regarded in the corner of his eyes. _Eriol _knew right away that something was amiss, taking note of her jagged breathing and unfocused gaze. Just before he could ask if she would like something for her headache _Tomoyo_ had already collapsed, her darkest hair splayed carelessly on the wooden floor.

* * *

Quick Notes:

**yoroshii** – "Great!"

**maa** **maa** – "Alright, alright."

**minna** – everybody


	7. 7

Act 7, Autumn

She carefully opened her heavy lids, finally awakening from a seemingly bottomless sleep. Her body was so much lighter than it had been for days that she was almost floating. The fragile, pallid light that was coming out of the only window seemed artificial in the expanse, otherworldly and curiously detached. As _Tomoyo _blinked once again, vast whiteness was revealed before her sight as if mist had just ascended all around. The feeling brought her a sense of tranquility which consequently confused her somehow.

The room, if it was in any way a room, was empty save the bed beneath her. There was something peculiar about this arrangement, something that she couldn't place.

"Where am I?" Her musical voice rang in the emptiness that flowed everywhere.

The question wasn't supposed to be said out loud but she anyway found her thoughts effortlessly falling out of her mouth.

"I have found you."

It was wild impulse that she immediately removed herself from her current sitting position, running to the only exit that appeared to flee from her outstretched arm. It wasn't long before she realized she couldn't chase the door anymore because it disappeared just as she could finally enclose her fingers on the silver knob. That consuming dread washed the stillness away in an instant.

"_Tomoyo_."

"Get away from me!" The frightened girl yelled back to the deep, haunting voice that echoed in her head. "Must you follow me everywhere?"

The noise of her furiously beating heart greatly resounded in her ears, overwhelming her more than the distorted variety of _Sonomi_'s voice even when she tried to cover her ears to block the noise.

"I have found you."

Amidst the rising fog, a towering silhouette startlingly came into sight, moving agonizingly listless towards her direction, a slow torture to some extent. Blood left her face, and by instinct she stepped back, endlessly trying to escape until her back connected to the cool wall. The other sides of the bare space had rapidly closed in on her as well, suffocating her in the induced claustrophobia.

"Please,_ okaasama_," _Tomoyo _painfully begged over and over again, echoing to no avail, unable to stop the tears from streaming steadily down her paler cheeks. Her wide amethyst eyes could only horrifyingly watch the growing shadow take her mother's tall form. The specter twitched once, twice, rising above her quivering shape. "Don't do this anymore."

"_Tomoyo_."

At that moment her name was said in the faintest inflection, and fleetingly she thought she was imagining that the voice was much more different than the last.

"I have found you, _Tomoyo_," the shadow whispered softly, altogether pacifying her and dissolving her fear and that thunderous drumming sound that filled the air. The pressure was lost all of a sudden as if it never existed.

"Wh-who are you...?" Her breathing returned to normal as well.

Little by little the mist was lifted, and ultimately revealed the phantom's bluest eyes.

He didn't seem to have understood the question as he refused to acknowledge it, yet eventually, he closed the gap between them and stood right before the former heiress, looking real and ethereal at the same time.

"I have found you."

When the unnamed ghost's amazingly warm hand tenderly touched her face, a soft light enveloped them and swallowed the emptiness in that breadth.


	8. 8

**A/N: **Thanks for reading and for the reviews. :) And I dedicate this chapter to 2 of my most supportive readers, **Benjamin Lau **and **NoneofYourBwax**. Love ya, guys. :)

* * *

Act 8, Autumn

_Eriol_ fought the urge to audibly sigh, finding it too selfish of him to do so. He couldn't find that inner peace despite the lulling hum of her sound breathing. In fact, the dark-haired pianist hadn't been by any means at ease since that night he found her unconscious. He couldn't forget how he had reacted upon seeing her like that, sprawled on the ground lifeless. It was unlike him to be so—

—_Out of control_, his braver mind finished for him and he could only frown at the sight of the IV drip above the young woman's head.

The nurse came to offer him a fresh cup of green tea, which _Eriol _graciously accepted but still chose to neglect at the time being. However, the swirling display of supple steam that rose from the china arrested his bitter morning meditation for a minute.

"She's dreaming again, isn't she?" _Akizuki Nakuru_, his cousin's assistant, said quietly, peering over the patient's fairly tensed face before pulling the pasty linen covers closer to her chin. It was intensely raining outside the draped windows, the late autumn draftiness leaking through the walls somehow despite the installed heater in the clinic.

They stood rather close to the bed, watching the cataleptic young woman take uneven inhalation as if the _kohai_ was fighting for air. _Tomoyo _had been unconscious for two days, but this restless state had happened more than once in between those days.

"What is happening to her, _Nakuru-san_?"

_Nakuru _instantly checked her client's vital signs again and deemed them normal regardless of the girl's restive condition.

"_Daidōji-chan_ needs this rest so we'll just have to wait again until she wakes up on her own," the nurse whispered again, almost to herself. "But she's troubled. I wonder what she dreams about."

_She is dreaming about her mother, _the young man thought to himself, recalling the girl muttered the word in a delusion. It also proved as a clue to whatever the amethyst-eyed girl was going through these days.

"I am going to help _Kinomoto-sensei _with the clinic report, _Eriol-kun_. Please look after _Daidōji-chan _for the mean time," she excused herself, velvety long brown hair sweeping across her face as she made a bow.

When the comely nurse left he returned his gaze on the sleeping woman's face. In the middle of his muddled reflection, _Tomoyo _had started crying, tears leaking slowly from her closed lids and crimson lips slightly parting in muted cry.

"_Daidōji-san_," he weakly called her name, trying to soothe the dreaming girl who didn't even stir from _Nakuru_'s touch a few minutes ago. The girl still refused to rouse and her tears were already staining the pillow when she slightly moved her head to _Eriol_. "What is bothering you?"

_Eriol _wasn't sure what made him so eager to lean closer to tentatively dab the silver trail of tears on her creamy face. His fingers that merely ghosted the softness of _Tomoyo_'s skin moved back to brush a dark lock away from her eyes.

_Wake up, Daidōji-san_.

He remembered how she appeared to be misplaced in the piano room that afternoon weeks ago. Her cascading, raven tresses and fair face didn't belong in the austerity of that place, and besides her enigmatic nature, the raw emotion in her music intrigued him. There really was a secret that needed to be unraveled about her. Of course it was not right to recall about things like that more than once, but he supposed it was anyway unavoidable in the last few days, though the _senpai _did not need to blame _Tomoyo _for such circumstances.

Dazed sapphire met equally bemused amethyst.

"You," _Tomoyo Daidōji _said in a relatively husky voice, staring at his wide azure eyes. She was still caught in a pensive state when she leisurely lifted a pale hand to reach his face. "You have the most beautiful eyes."

The dreamy look on the girl's interestingly flushed face only added to her already potent appeal. For a second, _Eriol _was powerless to her innocent charm.

"_Eriol-kun_," began the young doctor, who was just walking in the room, oblivious to the awkward situation that his cousin got himself involved in. "Aren't you going to be late for school? It's already past eight."

The pianist was at least able to capture _Tomoyo_'s fingers before she could sweep his bangs away, saving them from any more embarrassment her future actions would cause them.

"_Oniisan, Daidōji-san_ is finally awake," _Eriol _informed him when he recovered from his dorm mate's transitory spell before averting to finally grab the already cooled tea on the table. Whatever just happened made him suddenly self-conscious and uncomfortable, and he figured that it was about time the he dissolved from the scene once again.

_Tōya Kinomoto _was quick to call his assistant in the room.

"How do you feel, _Daidōji-san_?" With his tall form, he easily hovered the young woman's supine form.

As the girl gradually regained recognition, and as her eyes lost the wistful glaze after few quick blinks, her tentative youthful glow became a mortified blush.

"What happened? Where am I?"

* * *

Quick Notes:

**oniisan **– older brother


	9. 9

Act 9, Autumn

The utter embarrassment that _Tomoyo_ felt was solely made evident through her warming face, and for a moment this young handsome doctor who lingered by the bed assumed her fever hadn't abated at all.

"_Daijōbu Kinomoto-sensei_," the nurse, who had checked her temperature, said with an amused smile. "_Daidōji-chan_'s just a little confused right now."

_Eriol_ was standing by the door now, a dark coat in his arms as he bid his goodbye to no one in particular, unfocused and slightly ruffled in some way despite the long drink he just had. It was rather too strange of the bespectacled dorm mate to seem so uncomfortable as if he suddenly didn't want to be in that room, but then _Tomoyo _supposed that her muddled thoughts must have played tricks on her. Besides, she didn't know _Eriol Hiiragizawa _that long to be able to say much about him.

_But you didn't really say that to him, did you? _The saner part of her jeered mercilessly, reminding her of what just happened. Somehow the girl couldn't remember the exact words that came out of her mouth but the strange color on the _Eriol_'s pale face told her that she really must have done something completely awkward the moment she opened her eyes. The _senpai _had caught her hand in the midst of her convenient exploration of his face after all.

"Why was _Hiiragizawa-san _here?" She couldn't help herself but ask.

"_Eriol-kun _was the one who had brought you to my clinic, _Daidōji-san_. That was a smart decision to make," _Tōya _told her noncommittally without a glance at her as he made quick notes on his patient's medical chart before he handed it to his assistant. "You collapsed just when you were coming in the apartment, burning with a very high fever. You do at least remember that you were with my cousin before you fell, don't you?"

"I...suppose so." In her mind, even the memory of leaving _Aoiya_ that night wasn't so clear to her. She could only vaguely recall about a troublesome headache that plagued her that day.

"You had a mild concussion which took your memory of the last activities you had before you fainted," the _sensei _stated helpfully. "_Eriol _worried too much when you wouldn't wake up sooner than he had expected, and I had to explain to him that you were just recuperating, your body making up for your neglect."

_Senpai? Worried about me?_

"_Nee Daidōji-san, _were you seriously trying to overwork yourself to the point of absolute exhaustion? Stress can kill, you know."

"_Anō_...how long was I unconscious, _sensei_?" She chose not to comment on the physician's statement even when he cryptically rested his dark eyes on her amethyst orbs.

"Two days, _Daidōji-san_. _Jaa_, it was the first time in years that I have seen my stoic cousin lose control like that. I don't think _Eriol-kun _had slept at all in the past two days," _Tōya _said as he shook his head to himself.

She managed not to look too fazed about this information, attributing it to the young doctor's attempt to affability while his assistant, this evenly attractive nurse, was adjusting her IV drip and carefully helping her sit up. But somehow the girl couldn't shake off the feeling of shame in her.

"It's almost winter again, _Nakuru-san_. I hope _Eriol-kun _takes caution. At this rate, he'll get himself seriously sick," the only male in the room softly addressed the nurse with a hint of concern in his low voice. It was an afterthought that came when he slid the drapes on the sides of the wide east bay window. _Tomoyo_ briefly thought the doctor had the same raven mane as her _senpai_, but only when _Tōya_ stood close to the window did she realize that her _senpai_'s cousin actually had dark russet hair that deflected an interesting shade of ginger in the partial illumination.

_Nakuru _only smiled again but in a rather tender way as she looked over the worried man, who had started moving towards the bed again.

"_Daidōji-san,_ this may sound too imposing but I'd like you to promise me that you won't do this to yourself anymore. _Eriol-kun _told me about your situation. You're taking classes in the morning and then you're working after that. It would've sounded right if you only have one or two jobs. But four? Your body wouldn't be able to hold together for that long."

He had seemed so daunting with his disapproving brown eyes, and when _Tomoyo _wouldn't say anything to counter him because there really would be no point in trying to defend herself, _Tōya _could only heave a sigh, raking his already messy hair in defeat.

"I'm sorry. It's not my place to lecture you," he apologized, taking his pristine medical coat from _Nakuru_'s extended arms. "I sense there's a reason behind your actions, _Daidōji-san_, and I should respect that."

_I just wanted to distract myself, to pretend that I can still run away from this hell okaasama is making me go through._

_Didn't you choose this path for yourself? You pushed yourself too much, and you know it. _Perhaps her mind was much wiser than she could ever be.

"I understand, _sensei_. I didn't mean to burden you in any way," the former heiress said in remorse, coloring yet again.

"_Oh_, no. Don't get me wrong. What I was trying to say was that even sometimes you have to take care of yourself," the doctor said with an embarrassed grin that easily vanished in his next declaration. "I wish _Eriol-kun _heeds this same advice. I'm the family doctor, and he never listens to me!"

His last words though they sounded comical echoed distressed in the amethyst-eyed girl's ears, and she wondered what _Eriol_'s older cousin was really so worried about.

"_Jaa_, would you like some breakfast, _Daidōji-san_? Though I am afraid porridge will have to do for now. I'm sure you're famished."

With a shy smile, _Tomoyo _succumbed to the invitation.


	10. 10

Act 10, Autumn

In her mind she had already hurled and broken all the fragile china on the floor of _Wei_'s dainty kitchen, thrashing out all her anger and frustration as noisily as she could the moment _Rika _departed the peaceful apartment. But of course being _Tomoyo Daidōji_ meant self-control despite everything, and she could only allow herself to crash and slide against the tiled island counter in the middle of the room as an intense reaction. She wasn't anymore surprised by the turn of events, not too much anyway, not after having found out that she had "withdrawn" all her classes this morning. Her professors wouldn't accept her in class and she left the university embarrassed and defeated. Apparently, somebody who had ties with _Osaka _University and who could pull the strings without much effort had done that, and now even the daycare center's manager had dismissed her and an unwilling _Rika _had come to see her to bring the ill news.

"_Gomen Tomoyo-san_. _Obasan wouldn't give me a reasonable explanation why she had to let you go_."

The woman couldn't even bring her cinnamon eyes to look at her, ashamed for not being able to provide any acceptable reason to the _kohai_'s unexpected release. _Tomoyo _was one of the hardest workers in the subway facility, and she knew the dark-haired girl badly needed this job to sustain herself.

"_I understand, really__._ _I just wish I could have properly said goodbye to the children_."

They had exchanged a few forced pleasantries to ease the apprehension in the air but _Rika _had to excuse herself eventually.

"_Anō," _the _senpai _had hesitantly uttered just as she was turning to leave._ "I'm not quite sure if this has anything to do with obasan's decision, but before she asked me to see you, there was a mysterious man who wanted to speak to her about one of her employees_. _Do you think that might have any connection to this?_"

_Of course, okaasama have always been serious about her threats_.

_Tomoyo _didn't need to ask any more of what had happened then, suddenly uninterested and tired, and only thanked _Rika _for coming to see her in spite of the news.

"_I'm really sorry, Tomoyo-san_."

She shook her head and handled a serene look on her paler face and an easy bow, but inside she broke into a million pieces all over again.

* * *

Everybody, the idle instructors and students in the hallways, could note that those amethyst eyes of hers were unusually passive despite the brighter afternoon. She offered a reserved smile and a bow to any greeting that came her way but she never stopped her determined pursuit of the headmaster's office in the southern wing.

"_Daidōji-san_," _Yoshiyuki Terada _acknowledged the former heiress with an allusion of surprise, bowing anyway as the young instructor made her way to her superior's desk. "I was just about to call for you."

Stacks of paper, a scheduler, a digital clock and a framed picture of a smiling _Rika Sasaki _angled obliquely were just a few of the things that could be seen on his table. He didn't attempt to arrange the disorder in front of him but he stopped whatever activity he was previously engaged in to entertain _Tomoyo_.

"I'm sorry if I interrupted your work but there is something urgent that I would need to speak to you about," _Tomoyo _stated without delay, clutching a signed paper in her hands. Her agitation was ambiguous despite her pursed lips and tensed movements.

"I think I know what this is about, _Daidōji-san_," _Terada _said just as the young woman was going to hand the paper to him, unaware of her anxiety.

"You do?" She wondered if her mother had already reached him and knew what she was really here for, but then the former heiress instantly dismissed the thought when the youthful headmaster had an easy grin on his tanned face. That certainly wouldn't be his reaction if he's forced to let her go.

_Terada_ politely made a gesture for the instructor to take a seat.

"I'm glad that you're back today. Your students couldn't be consoled on your first day of absence, and I had to ask my sister to take care of your voice class," he told her.

"I didn't mean to cause anyone trouble." She seemed to be apologizing a lot these days.

"Forgive me. I'm not trying to make you feel guilty, _Daidōji-san_. I just remembered how the children harassed my sister in her first substitution class." His rich laughter reverberated in his office, overwhelming the fugue playing in the background. "Anyway, so he had told you about his proposition for the recital next month then. What do you think of a piano duet? It's not entirely a rare event in recitals. Actually, I personally think yours would be an interesting arrangement."

"Recital? Piano duet?"

The fleeting exhilaration ran through her veins.

"A duet with _Eriol-kun_, yes. His and your debut of sorts. Didn't he mention it to you? I was sure he was going to after he spoke to me yesterday." The crease on _Terada_'s forehead was enough sign that he was puzzled himself, and the grin on his lips quickly melted away. "_Eriol-kun _had previously told me about discovering your talent by accident, but it was just yesterday that he made a proposal."

_Hiiragizawa-san?_

Her dark lashes fluttered at the heady suggestion, heart hammering madly against her chest. The blush rose to her face as she recalled of the day when the dorm mate had found her in his practice room.

_But I can't—not now when—_

"I really have no idea about any proposal, _kōchō-sensei_," the former heiress confessed however, foiling her own sudden excitement as her hope was devastated by her own ruthless reality. "In fact, I came here early for an entirely different matter."

Even before he had it in his hands, _Terada _had already read the graceful _kanji _on the folded paper.

"You're resigning?" Pure disbelief graced his previously smiling face.

"_Hai_." She expected herself to look so upset as the word was spoken, but the young woman thankfully was able to keep a straight face despite her inner turmoil.

"I don't understand why you are doing this. Didn't you say you love teaching music to children?"

_Tomoyo _hid her shaking hands in her front pockets.

"I do. I really love teaching and children and music...and you gave me the opportunity of pursuing what I've dreamed of since I was a child. But I'm leaving _Tomoeda_, _kōchō-sensei_."

"If I may ask...why, _Daidōji-san_?"

"I have somewhere else to be." Though that wasn't completely a dishonesty, the young woman was silently restless and could not look up to the headmaster's face.

_Terada _might have taken the action as a consequence of cultured indifference.

"It's inevitable."

"What is?"

"I can't stay. I shouldn't stay," _Tomoyo_ calmly said, not even answering his question, but inside she was privately pained at the fact that she had to leave very soon, too. "I hope you understand."

_Terada _had stood from his seat and carefully paced a short distance from the sparsely decorated walls to the cushioned seat right across the amethyst-eyed girl. He had tried to read through the mask that his youngest voice instructor had suddenly sported the moment she looked away from his eyes, but he couldn't quite get past her pretense to detached composure. _Daidōji Tomoyo _had seemed pleased at her _senpai_'s proposal earlier.

The Brahms symphony that just previously reached the closing bars left a suspended emptiness in the air as the only two people in the room sat still, thoughts afloat to divided concerns. The intense radiance of the afternoon sun hadn't been enough consolation to any of them.

"I suppose I have no choice but to accept this," the superior told her finally, but not without a disappointed sigh. "However, know that I regret letting you go so easily, _Daidōji-san_. I really would have wanted to see what you could do with _Eriol-kun_."

_Tomoyo_ could only bow in silent gratitude to the headmaster.

As her now former employer saw her out of the door a pleasant Mozart sonata greeted their ears.

"That's _Eriol-kun_," _Terada _remarked almost absentmindedly, staring at the slightly opened practice room athwart his office. "He particularly likes this adagio played much softer than necessary."

The young headmaster and his former voice instructor peered at the door pane, automatically drawn to the quiet music's invitation. The bespectacled pianist's rather taut posture on the bench and his unreadable face were harsh disparities to his limber fingers on the ivories in front of him.

"_Clow Reed_ should be proud of the boy," the older one among the unmoving spectators said, still strangely thoughtful. "His son had worked so hard to catch up with him. _Eriol-kun _should also realize that he is his own person."

A shadow had formed on the dark-haired man's face as the macabre shade of the nearby tree fell on his suddenly lithe figure. The pianissimo was performed more harshly than what was intended of the piece.

_Why, Hiiragizawa-san? Why did you have to give me hope just when I have to go away?_

"I can only hope for the success of the recital, _sensei_."

She didn't even know why she had to say that.

**

* * *

A/N: **Yeah, there's a hint of Terada/Rika there, you haven't read it wrong. And, Eriol is playing the piano part of Mozart's Piano concerto no.23: Adagio. You might want to check that one out.

* * *

Quick Notes:

**gomen/gomen nasai - **"I am sorry."

**obasan - **aunt

**kocho-sensei – **headmaster


	11. 11

**A/N: **I think I was too concerned with the development of the plot that I've sacrificed the quality of the fanfic. But I tried my best. If there are any trite words, sentences, whatever, please point it out to me. I'm a little slower this past few days, you see. I dedicate this chapter to **Anonymous Amethyst**. I appreciate your support very much. Mwah!

* * *

Act 11, Autumn

Perhaps it was not _Terada_'s unfortunate news or the headmaster's implicit urging but his own clamorous sixth sense that prompted him to literally run after _Daidōji Tomoyo_. Something was surely happening again. He knew it, and whatever it was, it must certainly involved the attractive amethyst-eyed dorm mate.

It was one of those few times when he couldn't break free of the stubborn feeling of edginess, a troublesome agitation that further burned his already exhausted lungs, and he wondered how he even got himself concerned about these things when he was supposed to be only a bystander to the events, a passive observer. That was just what he liked to keep on believing, but once more he was vulnerably drawn to her, much more than the last time. _Hiiragizawa Eriol _didn't understand why it was happening again and again, and what was worst, he couldn't help himself.

Cold sweat had carefully formed on his temples, anticipation making his head light. Finally, he was freed from the constricting atmosphere of the train station in just a few steps.

_Eriol _had always been a very patient person but tonight he was particularly intolerant of the limitations of his own feet and his poor eyesight.

_How could she have disappeared so fast?_ The dark-haired pianist mentally cursed as he rounded the bend, gasping for more air and squinting persistently. His glasses had suddenly fogged in the bitter cold just when he only had the girl's flowing raven hair for a guide in recognizing her among the rushing pedestrians ahead.

At last _Eriol _could distinguish _Tomoyo_'s familiar petite figure swiftly advancing to a curve several yards away from his right. This time he was sure the girl was headed for _Aoiya,_ and despite the stream of high school girls to her general direction, she wasn't showing any signs of stopping.

When he finally called out her name and _Tomoyo_ jerked in surprise to the source of his cry, two men in uniform suits had suddenly emerged to corner her. It would not seem like the _kohai _was in danger in public but the men who surrounded her looked suspicious enough especially with the vaguely disguised proximity. They didn't seem to allow the dark-haired girl any freedom to move.

By now dusk had completely broken through the clear heavens, and the roads had begun to appear busier in the rush hour.

"_Oi_. What are you doing standing behind the ginkgo, _Hiiragizawa_?"

Of all places to make an appearance _Syaoran Li _just had to drive around this particular block.

"_Li, Daidōji-san _is in trouble." He stood too far to be able to understand what his _kohai _and her dubious companions were talking about, but it was the inherent element of his own words that made his stomach constrict painfully. Did he mean to get too involved he couldn't quite tell for now.

The pointed look on _Eriol_'s Chinese friend prompted him to uncomfortably stir in his position just as _Tomoyo _and the men escorting her started moving to the solitary car nearby. Consequently, _Syaoran _followed the pianist's gaze and noted the stiffness in _Tomoyo_'s movements. There had been no apparent struggle at the moment.

"Get in." He would have scoffed at the sight of the indigo scarf whirled haphazardly about _Eriol_'s neck if he didn't look so serious right then.

"Follow them." _Eriol _almost seemed to have barked at him as the dark-haired man caught himself in a violent fit of coughs. The prickling pain was quite excruciating that tears had formed in the corners of his eyes as he instinctively leaned back on the passenger's seat in attempt to subdue the uncomfortable ripple in his chest.

_Not now_. _Kami-sama, not now_.

That alarmed expression on _Syaoran_'s face was interestingly priceless that _Eriol _nearly laughed.

"_Maa ii deshō," _he managed to assure in between shallow breaths and clumsy grin. "I've had worse."

"_Baka_! You know better than to run around with only those clothes on," his best friend reprimanded him before throwing his spare coat to azure-eyed man on his left. "If anything happens to you, _Kinomoto-sensei _will have my head."

If they weren't caught in such somber situation_ Eriol _had already jeered at _Syaoran _about his seemingly uncharacteristic concern.

"_Daidōji-san _would be the death of you. I guess you dying isn't such a bad idea after all. I'll even thank that girl for doing me a favor."

"I am not going to die, and would you please just follow that car?" The dark and twisted humor of the Chinese's words effectively eased the tension he created between them, and yet _Eriol_ couldn't resist rolling his eyes at that.

"What is happening, _Hiiragizawa_?"

"I don't know. That's what I'd like to find out."

"I never knew you're this interested in her."

"I am not interested in her," he automatically defended himself just before he bit his tongue to the words.

_That just have to be the most blatant lie you have said, _his mind hissed sooner than he could stop the derision.

"We are stalking her. Are you even aware of that?"

"She's acting strange, _Li_. _Terada-sensei _told me _Daidōji-san_'s just resigned this afternoon because she's moving away from _Tomoeda_. Do you know what that means?" _Eriol_ hated the way his voice betrayed his frustration. He wasn't always this irrational over something, but speculating about the _Tomoyo Daidōji_ riddle was driving him mad.

"Actually, no. Enlighten me why you should be so concerned that she is moving away."

_She's running away from somebody, Eriol_ darkly asserted in his head, unaware of his friend's last statement. _And it's her mother. Why is she running away from her mother?_

An awkward silence hung in the air when the bespectacled pianist shifted his attention to the active road to end the discussion. But of course, _Eriol _was actually appraising recent events. Her flawless English, that particular stormy weekend and that questionable bruise on his mysterious _kohai_'s face stuck in his head.

If _Syaoran _wasn't entirely convinced of his best friend's perverse and incomplete argument why they should be worried about something that could be potentially meaningless, he reserved his opinion to himself.

They had cleverly kept an unassuming distance from the expensive car they were trailing.

"You really like _Daidōji-san_." When the Chinese said this it had been as if he was astounded to have uncovered a very important truth and was amused of it. Those amber eyes made a swift examination on the bespectacled man's features, wanting to catch something in there.

"Didn't we just go over this, _Li_? I told you it's not like that," his azure-eyed friend said, exasperation laced in that low voice despite the stoic expression on his face. For the first time since he took the passenger seat, _Eriol _looked away from the street, relocating interest to the passing scenery in his left.

Another wave of cough was threatening to return, but he had to make deep breaths again to appease the impending tremor.

"Come on. You've been acting strange yourself. The great _Eriol Hiiragizawa _is never the one to do something this—"

"Stupid?" He challenged, eyes narrowing dangerously. _Syaoran_'s implication was quickly wearing his patience thin.

"I was going for reckless, but stupid sounds more appropriate now that you mentioned it."

"I would really like to hit you in the head if only you're not driving."

"_Shimeta_," _Syaoran _easily dropped his teasing, however still obviously enjoying the pianist's useless denial. "_Jaa, _what if all this is a fluke?"

They were back to the fundamental questions again.

_What if Tomoyo Daidōji just have to be somewhere else? _

"What if you're worried over nothing?" The Chinese asked the moment _Tomoyo'_s company pulled over the side of the street. They had driven right in front of the apartment and there was still no sign of struggle even when _Tomoyo _was lead inside the building.

_What if your theories are wrong? _

The noise of his restless heartbeat drowned the dying sound of the engine.

"I just hope my instincts are wrong, _Li_."

* * *

**A/N: **OK, so why is Eriol sitting on Syaoran's left? In Japan, the driver is on the right side of the car, and the passenger is on the left. Actually, I can be wrong. LOL :) I hope you didn't get confused by it.

* * *

Quick Notes:

**oi **– "Hey!"

**kami-sama **– God

**maa ii deshō **– "It's alright."

**baka **- stupid

**shimeta **– "Fine."


	12. 12

Act 12, Autumn

"_Daidōji-san_!"

The girl jerked her attention to the voice in surprise, almost slipping off the ledge in her sudden movement.

_Hiiragizawa-san?_

The rapid throbbing of her heart was quickly making her faint. Her sight suddenly blurred.

The young man's paler face was one of anxiety that deeply mirrored her own, azure eyes wide in shock. _Eriol Hiiragizawa _had seen her almost lose her balance in the growing darkness.

_How did you know—?_

"Jump!"

It was an order she didn't think would come out of his mouth, not when she almost had an accident, and it took her a long second to process what exactly he was telling her. If it weren't for the cold reality of the metal fence of the fire exit that stung her fingers she wouldn't have realized that she was able to cross a steadier pedestal.

"You don't have time to consider, _Daidōji-san_!" The bespectacled young man hissed edgily. He was still more than twelve feet below the last flight of stairs. The emergency stairway was fastened to the second story and was impossible to unshackle in her trembling hands.

"_But_—"

Frantic pounding on her locked door could be heard among the loud buzzing of her panicking thoughts.

_Okaasama—that's Okaasama behind that door._

"_Tomoyo_? _Tomoyo_, open the door this instant or I'll have it destroyed!"

Those amethyst eyes couldn't have dilated more than at that exact moment. The _Daidōji _matriarch had figured that she didn't have any intention to go back to _Osaka _with her when it took the girl long enough to just retrieve few belongings.

"_Hiiragizawa-san_—"

_Sonomi _called her daughter again before she finally barked her command to one of the guards to break the door open.

The heiress knew she had to make a decision right away. The lock that was securing the door close was giving up now and there was no other way out.

The younger _Daidōji_ shot another desperate look at _Eriol_ who was calling her as well.

"I can't do it!"

"I am going to catch you. Just jump!"

The deafening crash of shattering _shoji_ screens pushed her to madly climb down the last few steps and finally make that jump. The fear of her mother was much more potent than her fear of heights.

To _Tomoyo_, it felt like it was the longest fall she had to take yet she didn't even have the time to scream. Her heart must have pounded too violently against her chest that it hurt to even breathe.

"Are you alright?" _Eriol_'s horror was apparent in his tone, and he feared that the girl who had fit perfectly in his arms had passed out in fright. The fall was still high.

She opened her eyes and saw his terrified sapphire orbs transform to relief.

"We have to leave now, _Daidōji-san_. Can you run?"

_Tomoyo _couldn't trust her own voice and only nodded as she was settled on the ground. Her gaze never left the pianist's rather animated expression, thoughts strangely floating back to her conversation with _Yoshiyuki Terada _earlier that day. It was clearly the worst time to daydream about recitals and duets with her handsome _senpai_.

_I have gone mad. I am in the middle of escaping from Okaasama and all I can think of is Hiiragizawa-san_.

It didn't help her any when _Eriol _grabbed her hand without any warning, warming her long, cold fingers in his tight hold. Autumn was harsher that day, the temperature dropping too quickly.

They hurried to a waiting car nearby. It took time for the uniformed men to appear at the gates of the apartment and chase after them, and thankfully, _Hiiragizawa Eriol _was at an advantage and was already speeding to the direction of the nearest train station, leaving no trace for _Sonomi_'s men.

The noisy drone of her beating heart drowned any other sound around her.

"I was able to trick her." That had been the first thing she was able to say, finding it hard to believe.

"_Eh_?"

It wasn't too dark in the car to watch the bespectacled man's confused reaction, but dusk had already painted the skies dim. She didn't even notice how the night had come to pass, what with all that had just happened.

"_Okaasama_...I told her I had to get some things in my room," the raven-haired girl said quietly, caught in a trance of her recalling. "And she believed me. _Li-san _was there to distract her, too, coming in at just the right time. It was unbelievable."

Unsure of how to answer the _kohai, Eriol _only made a slight nod. That had been part of their hastily organized plan. _Syaoran Li _was to serve as the diversion to confuse _Tomoyo_'s escorts about what was happening, mentioning fire exits in his unusually excited conversation with _Wei _as if suggesting in the most casual manner without sounding obvious. _Eriol_ would be waiting for _Tomoyo_ outside if there was any development to the situation. It was up to the girl to figure out how to get out of the house without anyone's noticing. The plan wasn't at all fool-proof. _Syaoran had been_ telling him he could be wrong about everything but anyway left everything else to chance.

Thinking that the man right beside her didn't understand or was oblivious of what she was talking about, _Tomoyo _heaved a tired sigh and stroked her icy cheek with a delicate hand. The installed heater in the car seemed to have stopped working after five minutes and she was almost visibly shaking.

"Did they hurt you?"

When the strange question left his mouth, the car was almost in full stop from the slow traffic.

Surprised amethyst met hardened sapphire.

She couldn't understand why he sounded angry when he asked or why he would even ask her that.

"Did your mother cause that bruise before, _Daidōji-san_?" The heated note in his usually calm voice was still there but his expression didn't even shift. In the dimness that surrounded them it was not easy to read his eyes especially with those glasses on but _Eriol'_s knuckles had almost glowed white from grasping the steering wheel too hard. He was, of course, talking about a few weeks ago when she came home with a mark on her face, but she wasn't going to give in to him. _Hiiragizawa Eriol _shouldn't be too concerned with such thing because they were not even friends, and the former heiress didn't want him to get involved at all.

"_Hiiragizawa-san_, there was no—"

"Please...just answer me."

It was indeed odd that he was asking her all these, and in that troubled tone at that.

_How did he figure it out? There is no way he could have known about it._

"_Hai_," finally came the _kohai_'s hesitant answer.

"Are you hurt somewhere today?"

When _Tomoyo _shook her head it was only then that _Eriol _seemed to have been able to loosen his grip. Satisfied, the _senpai _didn't say anything else and only concentrated in parking the car in the busy road.

"We are leaving the car here, and we'll walk to the train station with the crowd," _Eriol _told her, securing his scarf on the girl's neck and handed the trench coat he had on. In any given day, the awkwardness would not be easy to deal, but this time they could not even afford it.

"I'll be riding the train with you, but I'll have to get off in a different stop."

"I'm heading _Hiroshima_," she said. It was the first place that came to her head. Though it was somewhere she wasn't familiar with, she figured it wouldn't be as hard as any other place.

"Don't. Get off in _Hakata _Station instead," the bespectacled young man distractedly instructed, leading her inside the station. It would not be difficult to blend in especially at rush hour.

"_Fukuoka_? _Dōshite_."

They had now stood below the signage with glaring _kanji_.

"That's about five hundred miles from here. It should be far enough."

Side by side the pair anxiously waited for a few more minutes behind the yellow line beneath their feet before the train to _Hakata _Station came. Both had secretly expected that _Tomoyo_'s mother would find them soon enough, but they were lucky that nobody had come yet and there was no second-guessing that they would not be able to escape once they were traced.

When they stepped in the train it had already been almost full and the couple had to stand exceptionally close to each other just as the last of the passengers had occupied that limited space they could get.

But _Eriol, _being the ever gentleman, blocked anymore passengers that would crush _Tomoyo _to the window.

"_Hiiragizawa-san_, you don't have to do this." Her voice had fallen into a whisper that betrayed her embarrassment. The pianist had to extend his arm to the window to maintain a decent breathing space for the former heiress. The position was uncomfortable and all too intimate for her.

_You keep on saying this, too. Maybe you should just get used to it, _her mind couldn't help but point it to her.

It was the first time that day that he offered a genuine smile that brought more red to the girl's face.

"Don't worry about it," he replied good-naturedly, amused for some reason.

It was harder to concentrate at what exactly he was saying, not when all she could breathe in was his scent that was a strange mixture of sandalwood and of something else she couldn't quite determine, of something so—

—_Eriol Hiiragizawa. Strange. I would never have reacted this way especially in a situation like this._

But there she was, slave of her female hormones. _Tomoyo _knew she was mad.

"Is there something on my face, _Daidōji-san_?"

_Is it possible to have melted under the man's gaze? _

The way he was looking at her made her scramble for an excuse.

"I'm just thinking."

It was impossible to think with his azure eyes reading her like that.

"About?"

The young woman finally averted her eyes at her _senpai_'s chest, pretending to be fascinated with his ID hanging there that showed his name and position in the music school. She had one like it until she surrendered it to _Terada_.

"I was surprised to see you outside my window. How did you know I was going to run away?"

"I didn't. _Li _was convinced I was crazy, but I felt you were in trouble." He had an odd look on his pallid face when he explained. _Eriol _seemed tired, too. Like as if he ran a mile and never really stopped. "I was hoping I had been entirely wrong but you're with me in this train to _Fukuoka_ right now."

_How could he have possibly felt that? Is it possible to have sixth sense over something like that?_

"_Daidōji-san_?"

"I'll tell you about it someday."

_Eriol _opened his mouth once but then decided against persuading her to speak now.

They stood in the same position for almost an hour before the young man announced that when the train stopped he would get off from there.

"I have my wallet and cell phone in the left pocket." He was referring to the coat she was wearing.

Her fingers met the smooth surface of a device and something leather when she fished in the over-sized pocket.

"Call me with _Li_'s number once you've arrived in _Hakata_. I have enough money to last you a week. Use it until I come for you sometime next week. My cousins will be in _Fukuoka _by then so you will have somewhere proper to live in."

By this time the train was slowing down and _Tomoyo _was painfully aware of the impending parting.

The pianist was already deciding for her, but she realized she didn't mind much. His concern for her was easily making the former heiress wistful.

"_Hiiragizawa-san_—"

"I have to get off now." When he said these words, _Eriol_ had sounded worried. He stared at _Tomoyo_'s anxious eyes before he started stepping back. "I'll see you in a few days."

Then suddenly he looked sick as he lifted one pale hand to his face.

"_Daijōbu desu ka_."

_

* * *

No. No, not now, please_.

A burning pain was consuming his lungs, yet the dark-haired pianist was fast enough to suppress a convulsion as he covered his mouth.

Those amethyst orbs were almost pleading him, but why they were so he couldn't tell. Maybe the girl was afraid to be alone, scared that her mother would find her anyway. His _kohai _was mouthing a question now but he was fast becoming so drained to even stay focused at anything.

"_Ganbatte Daidōji-san_," _Eriol _heard himself say before he forced his feet to bring him out of the sliding doors. When he turned his back he missed _Tomoyo Daidōji'_s look of concern. He was going to see the foolish girl one day, and he would make sure that she was kept out of trouble. The amethyst-eyed young woman was really going to be the death of him one day just like _Li Syaoran _had said. And with this thought, he finally lost control of his lungs and collapsed against a uniformed train station security who was on duty that night. His blurry vision was then filled with faces above his own but none of them looked like the girl with heliotrope eyes and inky, curling hair. _Eriol Hiiragizawa _was suddenly alarmed.

"Somebody make sure she'll be alright." His words came in gasps and the confused guard was yelling to the radio in his hand, something about an ambulance and a person who had fainted.

Another surge of spasm made his body jerk before _Eriol _had finally given up to unconsciousness.

* * *

Quick Notes:

**dōshite **– "Why?"

**ganbatte **– "Good luck."

**

* * *

Hakata Station** is really in **Fukuoka**.


	13. 13

**A/N: **I have to thank my first (and the only, LOL) 5 reviewers ever since I came back: **a****pple**,** Property of Eriol**, **cheng **(belated happy birthday, dear), **Benjamin Lau** and **Winter Ink**. Your reviews gave me inspiration to update sooner. The development may seem too fast now but I want to have that such time-skip because I'd hate to fill gaps with unnecessary situations. Heh Excuses! LOL Thank you, THANK YOU for those who still read this fic and for being infinitely patient. I seriously love you guys. Mwah!

* * *

Act 13, Winter

To say that _Tōya _was annoyed would be a shameful understatement.

He was just actually livid.

His foolish cousin was running around wearing just the right clothes for suicide again and he just had another uncontrollable urge to blame everything to the somber-looking Chinese _gaki, _who was gaping at his friend's form with a guilty look in his eyes.

It was almost amusing that the doctor was in such position again, checking on written observations on clipboards and deciphering lab results. These young people never seem to get enough of inflicting harm upon themselves, and _Eriol _was supposed to be a really sensible person.

And now this sensible person just had to fall into coma.

"You should rest, _Li-kun_." He heard _Nakuru _advise his cousin's best friend.

The Chinese had always been the first and last visitor in the intensive care unit, and it was almost pitiful to watch. Just today, he was sitting in a sad corner, brooding again. Nobody could tell when his friend would ever wake up.

"It was probably my fault," _Syaoran _mumbled more to himself than to anyone, suddenly scowling at the sheets that covered part of the hospital bed. Or was it the respirator that he was glaring at, it was hard to tell in the softness of the light in the room.

_Baka! It's all your fault!_

Before those words left his mouth his assistant had already shot him a warning look in the pretense of an unassuming flick of her warm golden eyes. She was wise enough to consider other people's feelings in this sort of circumstance.

There were a handful of reasons why he could never come to like _Eriol_'s best friend, and one of them was him not being able to at least look after the sickly boy at this time of the year.

"He chose to help_ Daidōji-chan_. There was no one else who could've done it better than him," the comely nurse said with a comforting smile. "_Li-kun, _it's not your fault."

_And where is that no-good father of his? Clow Reed could not really have abandoned his son like this, could he?_

"_Nee_ _Kinomoto-sensei._"

_Couldn't he see Eriol-kun's trying too damn hard catching up on him?_

"_Sensei_?"

_Nakuru _and_ Syaoran _were curiously wondering what he was spacing about. The physician felt it was unnecessary and ridiculous to start blaming anyone right now, especially that _Eriol _had been stable since yesterday. Though he still couldn't stop thinking about the collapse of the boy's lungs that had almost killed him. His cousin would just have to come around soon, or he would start blaming himself as well.

_All this sacrifice over a girl he barely knew_.

_Daidōji Tomoyo _would be forever enigma to _Tōya Kinomoto, _a secret he would not want to find out.

"Yes, yes. Now come along, _gaki_. I don't want to have to look after you, too, if you faint of deliberate abandon of your own health. Let's grab something to eat."

_Syaoran _didn't even try to bicker with the older man this time.

* * *

When _Tomoyo _finally decided to make that call, she already found herself some decent flat to stay and an inconspicuous job in a local library.

It had been almost two weeks since she took the train to _Fukuoka, _one week since she debated whether she really had to bother her_ senpai _even if it had been his own instruction, and five days since she thought it was strange that _Eriol _himself didn't call to at least check on her.

_You are not even friends_. _You are not his responsibility, _her reasonable mind interjected before she could shut it away.

She really didn't need to be reminded about that. That was why she didn't call him like he said she should. _Tomoyo _didn't want to dare to hope he was at least worried about her.

_Maybe he thought I can be fine on my own, _she told herself_. _

However, the girl had a nagging sense that something else might have held up the bespectacled pianist. She remembered how he seemed like he was going to vomit on his way out of the train. The azure-eyed man suddenly paled two shades lighter by then.

A few more rings had passed before there was finally an answer.

"_Moshi moshi_._"_

"_Sumimasen Li-san—" _

"Who is—_Daidōji-san_? You have _Hiiragizawa_'s phone." Why he sounded very much taken aback or confused that it was her in the other end she couldn't quite grasp. Surely, _Eriol _had already told him to expect her call.

"He told me to call your number when I've arrived in _Fukuoka—_"

"But that was supposed to happen last week then," he interrupted her again.

"Well, yes, something came up. Actually, that's also why I called." Obviously a lie.

_Syaoran Li _struggled to form the answer for a moment.

"Whatever it is it doesn't matter now." There was a sigh in the other line. "Should I go ahead and inform _Hiiragizawa _that you are doing alright on your own? I assume that's the case."

Of course it was just the situation or she wouldn't be calling ten days later than she was told.

The former heiress debated upon herself if she should ask to personally speak to him or leave a message instead.

The latter won mainly because there was nothing much to say anyway. Surely, _Eriol _changed his mind about seeing her again someday. It would be too much of a hassle keeping a connection with somebody so problematic like her. It just was not worth it.

"Please do, _Li-san_," _Tomoyo _told him, resigned at last. "I'm sorry for the trouble I've caused all of you. I'd appreciate if you'd also thank him for me. I'll most definitely repay him someday, in any way I can."

It took another pause before the Chinese could reply. She could barely hear animation in _Syaoran_'s end. The excitement in the background was distracting him. That or the amber-eyed young man was losing interest in their conversation.

"I'll be sure to tell him that," _Syaoran _said, acquiescing. "_Anō,_ I don't want to be rude but I'm in the middle of something right now and I need to go. Please take care of yourself. _Jaa_."

In a click the call was disconnected and an unending beep resounded in her ear.

The young woman stared at the phone as if she could not believe how it just ended. _Tomoyo Daidōji_ didn't think she would be disappointed about how the conversation went.

_Why? It doesn't make sense to feel this way._

Her fingers reached for her hair, a habit that formed in the last few weeks, but all they met was a length that stopped before the curls reached her shoulders. Her slender neck was mostly exposed now.

She tried not to feel dejected that she had to cut her raven tresses.

It wasn't that she was vain. It was more of having to let go of a part of who she was.

_But it's inevitable. How can I keep my identity unknown still looking like the heiress that I refuse to be?_

_Tomoyo _couldn't help but moan to herself.

"Wake up, _Tomoyo_. There is so much to do, and feeling sorry for yourself is not one of them," she reprimanded her miserable reflection before her.

That thought had her wiping the rest of the windows of the east wing of the deserted library as if there was no tomorrow.

* * *

There was too much commotion in the room today that it made his head hurt.

_Syaoran _was torn between whacking _Yamazaki_'s head for being so damn noisy or wringing _Eriol_'s neck for making him so worried.

His best friend finally woke up in his own private room after a week of being in the ICU, weak and demanding for some water to drink. He was almost convinced _Eriol _was being deliberate about the whole thing and wanted to torture him by falling into coma. He didn't think he deserved that kind of punishment.

"You bastard."

He wasn't able to stop himself and couldn't put into right words how tremendously relieved he was. The pianist's face was almost gaunt and his blue eyes lost some of that life, but he was mostly alright.

"Is that how you greet someone who almost died of lung cancer?" _Eriol, _though still looking very frail and serious on that hospital bed, managed to croak a gag when his best friend came closer to them.

"Is that what it really was?" His eyes couldn't have appeared rounder than then. The Chinese thought it was a winter disease that was only critical when untreated.

_That's just how any disease might react when ignored, ne. But cancer?!_

"Of course not, _Li-kun_. Don't be ridiculous. It was more like Tuberculosis or something."

What the ironically smiling _Yamazaki Takashi _said threw him off.

"_Eh_?"

"Pulmonary fibrosis, you gullible _gaki_," _Tōya _told the amber-eyed young man at last, making his presence known and probably wondering how susceptible he could be to lies. "Remember that well, or I'll drill that to your thick skull."

The physician had a poker expression on his youthful face as he looked on, looking even more sinister in that bored stance of his.

_Syaoran_ didn't know how he was able to contain his urge to kill his friends for the cruel joke. He didn't need to be embarrassed in front of the doctor again. That smug air around _Kinomoto Tōya _was degrading him even further.

The boys were just exchanging their belated pleasantries when _Tōya _decided to be a kill joy again, announcing that they only have a few more minutes before they needed to leave. Their presence was doing his cousin more harm than good with their juvenile riot.

_Everything is good now, Syaoran _mused.

His best friend would positively recover from what happened, and _Daidōji Tomoyo, _who was unexpectedly an heiress of a mammoth textile company, had earned her emancipation. They did their part and it should be enough. Whatever her reasons for running away were, he was out of it, and so should _Eriol _be, even if his friend might have been interested in the girl.

It was as if the young man had thought of a horrible curse or made some sort of premonition. The moment the contemplation ended, _Yamazaki _just had to open his mouth.

"Who was that on the phone just now?"

_Li Syaoran_ fell on mid-step. He could feel the shift in the room, the unavoidable stasis, and _Tōya's_ piercing stare was almost untrusting.

They hadn't even gotten out of the room when the dark-haired asked.

_Yamazaki _waited as he tilted his head on one side while _Eriol _looked as if he just remembered something important and waited for _Syaoran_'s response like he knew what he was about to say.

He could only imagine whatever consequence that was to come out of this.

"_Daidōji-san_."

And those azure eyes had undoubtedly come alive to the name.

* * *

**A/N**: WTF on confusing POVs. I have no idea. I needed to go rant using Tōya's thoughts. *sigh* But at least he hates Syaoran, right? Not very OOC now, is he? And, of course, feedbacks would be very much appreciated. Good, bad, doesn't really matter. Nothing is more frustrating to writers than seeing story hits and no comments from readers. So please, read and review.

* * *

Quick notes:

**gaki **- brat

**moshi moshi **- "Hello?"


	14. 14

**A/N: **I would like to thank (again and again and again) **Property of Eriol **for being so supportive. **POE **is so sweet for always encouraging me. :) This chapter is for you, my dear. Enjoy, guys.

* * *

Act 14, Winter

There was usually not much snow in _Fukuoka _during winter, and when it came it would soon melt away despite the extreme cold because it rarely ever stayed. At least that was what the elderly superior in the library said that morning, despite snowflakes falling on her open palm when she ran errands for the old man. It seemed that the climate wasn't going to be the same this year. It would just be about time when snow would blissfully swathe the whole town in white.

_Tomoyo _picked up the warm porridge that she had ordered through the phone earlier, reassured that the waitress didn't care about her appearance, because nobody ever gave her a second look with her disguise now except maybe for some curious high school boys she ran into a few times when she did her chores in the afternoon. The grey contacts she was now wearing and the shorter hair gave her another identity, of one meek and plain girl who liked wearing her apron anywhere she went. The former heiress was almost confident walking around this depressing town in _Hakata _without the threat of ever being discovered.

"_Arigatō gozaimashita_," the waitress called out as _Tomoyo_ made her exit, bowing in gratitude for patronizing their product. Sales were slower than the usual.

The raven-haired young woman was bowing back when she remembered how she had been a waitress herself in _Aoiya _once.

_Chiharu-san and Naoko-san are probably wondering where I am now._

The girls were kind to her, supportive and encouraging of her freelance designing job, and of course they were also very dear friends.

_Hiiragizawa-san would have told them what happened_.

_If he ever cared to do so. He didn't even see you like he promised_, her sardonic thoughts mocked her.

She instinctively fiddled with the bespectacled pianist's phone in her pocket. The ebony device never left her side even if she had it turned off ever since calling _Syaoran_, and she couldn't understand her attachment to it.

_Hiiragizawa-san did not promise anything, Tomoyo _bit back, surprised of her own temperamental comeback as she dropped the cell phone inside the pocket as if it burned her hand. The girl shook her head, pushing back any more thoughts that were supposed to have been left in _Tomoeda_. She had to make an attempt at being contented with things now because it was her choice to run away.

A puff of breath came out of her chapped lips just as an airplane flew by just above the buildings. The grey clouds covered the skies and made the day gloomier than it already had been for days.

"I should have gone to _Okinawa _where winters are warmer," _Tomoyo _absentmindedly whispered to herself before she was distracted by the remarkably tall Christmas tree that was currently being set up by a group of middle-aged men in the heart of the nearly empty plaza.

Christmas would come soon but it would not have any meaning to her. It had not been anything special in the last fifteen years because she had been mostly alone.

But it would be inevitable, and it would soon be brighter in the evenings with the lights all around. People would undoubtedly be happier, and it would be painful to look at because she couldn't be.

"_Aya-chan_, what are you standing there about? Get inside now. You will freeze in the cold."

_Tomoyo Daidōji _turned to her manager, an easy fake smile plastered instantly. The wind from the East blew viciously, ruffling her curling tresses and the indigo scarf.

She was getting used to her new name.

"_Hai_! I'm coming in."

The chicken porridge in its container was now as cold as her heart.

A snowflake had been caught in his dark hair when he finally stepped out of the plane. One of the passengers had already made a comment about snowing in _Fukuoka_, and he wondered if it would ever be possible.

The pianist knew he was grudgingly delayed for almost a month because his cousin would not put up with him this time and had him almost strapped on his hospital bed because he wouldn't stay still. _Syaoran _was frustratingly playing the willing accomplice to _Tōya_ in spite of his dislike to the older man, and even refused to leave him alone.

He wasn't going to be stupid this time. The azure-eyed young man would be more careful than he had ever been in his life now, even yielding to the family doctor's suggestion of wrapping himself in layers and layers of clothes to keep him warm and taking a break from his work in _Yoshiyuki Terada's _music school.

_But what's the point of still coming here now?_

_Eriol _had demanded to hand him _Syaoran_'s phone the moment the latter admitted who had just called. It seemed to him that the Chinese never had any intention of letting him know, at least while he hadn't fully recovered. His best friend would not look at him in the eyes for several days to come.

He regretted not remembering about her the moment he awoke. He had been unconscious for too long, and the medicines the doctors had him take were muddling his senses most of the time and were giving him difficulty staying up for more than a few hours.

_She said she is just fine on her own. What else is left to do?_

His phone refused to ring when he called back. The pianist always tried for days but every time he did there was a prompt playing that the device was turned off. He simply gave up when it was _Tōya _who persuaded him to just let go already.

Apparently, there was no hope of ever knowing where _Daidōji Tomoyo _was. He didn't even know why he should keep doing this.

"Master _Eriol_, _Kinomoto-sama _just called. He said little Miss will be arriving anytime soon."

_Eriol _gave a feeble nod of acknowledgement before _Wei _turned away to collect their belongings.

The door opened and it didn't take long before the person who had just burst in to reach the receiving area with her sure and confident strides.

"_Konnichiwa_. How can I help you today?" _Tomoyo _greeted the girl who looked peculiarly apologetic for whatever trouble she may cause the former in the future.

"Hi. I was told that the only copy of a certain book can be found here," she promptly told the raven-haired young woman with a ready smile. "I'd like to lend it. Would you be able to help me?"

The guest was an incredibly pretty and petite girl with hair of dark honey that hung just above her shoulders and eyes that shone an attractive shade of green. Her unexpected presence was a welcoming warmth that diffused the dullness of the room.

"Sure. I'd be very happy to assist you," _Tomoyo _said, trying to match the girl's cheerful tone with her own. She was secretly glad this girl had come that afternoon because she was almost wondering if anyone would step in the library at all that day. It was unusually quiet except for the occasional beating of the branches of the dead tree on one of the windows and the music that was playing softly from her superior's CD player behind the table.

"What book are we looking for?"

"It's actually fairly old. The name is Howl's Moving Castle."

_Tomoyo _led them to the older archives, the sound of the guest's suede boots against the floor resonating easily. They immediately checked among their few collections of foreign books if the said novel was really there.

"I'm quite sure I've seen it here. I was arranging the books in this area yesterday when I was quite distracted by the interesting cover," the dark-haired girl made an attempt at small talk.

"I was looking for a hard copy everywhere, and I never expected it could only be found in _Fukuoka_," the other girl was polite enough to indulge the former as she searched in the other side of the shelf, bending carefully to see the labels in _romaji_.

"Is that so?"

"_Hai_. How fortunate that I just have to be here, too. I travel around the country a lot, you see. My job dictates where I should be and all that. But my manager thinks I need a break, and it's almost Christmas after all. So I took the liberty of driving myself to the local library despite the cold."

The girl's emerald eyes were bright as she spoke, and the former heiress couldn't help but be drawn to her positive air.

"_Gomen ne_. I didn't mean to prattle on and on like that. I guess I got carried away by the excitement."

"It's fine. We all get carried away once in a while," _Tomoyo _assured her, straightening up as she handed the brightly-colored book that had swirling patterns of clouds on the cover. The tome somehow reminded her of the girl in front of her, light and pleasant.

"Wow. Thank you so much. You have no idea how happy I am right now," the guest thanked her with a bow.

They walked back to the receiving counter in companionable silence.

"My name is _Sakura Kinomoto, _by the way. You can call me _Sakura._ What's yours?"

The last stamp that marked _Sakura_'s library card was in place when the complicated piano sequence was playing between the girls, mocking _Tomoyo Daidōji _again and again.

"_Aya_," the library assistant introduced herself without so much as a flinch as she let another empty smile grace her alabaster face.

Deep inside she died one more time to her own lie.

* * *

Quick notes:

**arigatō gozaimashita **- "Thank you very much."; usually said by shopkeepers as an expression of gratitude.

**romaji **- Roman interpretation to Japanese words.

**

* * *

Howl's Moving Castle **is a novel, published in the 80s, and was then made into an animated movie in 2004. I would personally like to grab the hard bound copy of it.


	15. 15

**A/N: **This is sort of a filler chapter to make up for the sudden time-skip 2 chapters ago. But this also serves some purpose: for Tomoyo and Sakura's character development. Or a sad excuse for a filler. LOL Thank you to **Property of Eriol **for inspiring me to update sooner, and for **cheng **for the review. :) Please enjoy.

* * *

Act 15, Winter

When _Tomoyo Daidōji _saw _Sakura Kinomoto _walking through the double doors for the fifth time in two weeks she was already losing a part of her guard, and she found herself a little more comfortable around the cheerful guest even if she could not completely share her smiles.

This girl with curious emerald eyes wasn't finicky with her company or the former heiress would have been ignored a long time ago with her muted appearance and usually distant expression. The young woman with the darkest hair had simply become her friend.

"_Nee Aya-chan_, there's really good hot chocolate in that café downtown that I'd like to try. Would you like to come with me on your break? My treat!"

_Sakura _looked hopeful, raising those large eyes to _Tomoyo _and smiling sweetly as a sort of emotional blackmail.

The library assistant knew she had at least a few minutes before the old manager, who found her strange and antisocial, would shoo her away. She never seemed to like to speak to anyone or even attempted to make friends with the other employee, he had said. The girl was too withdrawn from the world, friendless and lonely, and this guest maybe the only one who could help her get by.

"You may take a break now," her superior declared all of a sudden after overhearing _Sakura_'s invitation as he walked by _Tomoyo_'s desk. "Please be sure to come back in an hour."

"But—"

"Come on, _Aya-chan_. The hot chocolate is really promising, and above all I would really appreciate your company today, so please say yes." Her new friend was pouting at the moment, looking more like a child than a woman who just turned nineteen. It appeared as if she knew this method worked with everybody when she was persuading.

"I guess it's alright."

_Sakura _didn't waste any more time as she excitedly dragged a confused _Tomoyo_ just as she was just draping her coat on her shoulders.

The delicate steam coming out of the beige demitasse was distracting her just like how the subdued lights in the coffee shop captured her concentration the first time they had walked in.

"How do you find it?" Her companion broke her daze as she brought her own cup to her lips cautiously. A drop of the drink could shamelessly stain her expensive cashmere sweater.

"_Eh_?"

"Are you mostly this distracted, _Aya-chan_?" _Sakura _giggled good-naturedly at her friend's bewildered expression, somehow amused at how innocent she looked.

_Tomoyo _could only blink back as she realized how she was easily side-tracked again. Even the smallest of things kept her repressed, and now she was only left embarrassed. She was painfully aware of how she couldn't measure up to _Sakura_'s enthusiasm and confidence, especially since she's someone who chose to be bitter and detached.

"The hot chocolate, how is it?" The smiling girl asked one more time.

"_Oh_. It's quite good. Actually, it's rather heavenly. Thank you for bringing me here," _Tomoyo _said, a small authentic smile forming in her lips. Unexpectedly, the dark concoction lifted her mood and warmed her inside.

"I've finally made you smile like that. I am so happy!"

"What do you mean, _Sakura-chan_?" She wasn't even allowed to be so formal with names, and it relieved her somewhat.

"Well, I noticed how you seem so troubled. Is there something I can help you with? You can tell me anything because we are friends, aren't we?" Her warm words deeply touched the former heiress, and _Tomoyo Daidōji _could only smile wider at the girl's kindness.

"I appreciate your concern. _Hontō ni_. But I'm fine. Just really thinking about the season."

Thankfully, she didn't have to lie this time. Winter made her remember about her _otōsan_. The head of the _Daidōji _household died in a terrible car accident twelve years ago, and she was unfortunately there to witness it. It was just starting to snow when the car crashed against a recklessly speeding truck, and then _Sonomi _just had to blame her own daughter for her husband's death and was never ever the same after that.

Remembering it always brought her new pain every time.

"My father passed away a few days before Christmas." Fortunately, her voice didn't break when she spoke.

_Sakura_'s sad face didn't suit her at all.

"I'm sorry."

"It was years ago, but I can never forget."

The girls fell in thoughtful silence as they drank from their cups.

"I lost my mother at about the same time, too. She had a disease that took her when I was just three, and she was only twenty-six," _Sakura _related quietly, a wistful glaze in her usually bright green eyes. "What's sad is that my favorite cousin has a similar condition, but we are hopeful he will overcome it if he's careful enough."

"I see," _Tomoyo _said understandingly, trying her best to console her friend by reaching for the former's hand and giving it a comforting squeeze.

"I'd like you to meet him sometime. I think you will like _oniichan_."

_That might complicate things. You are already tied again when you really shouldn't be, Tomoyo_'s more rational side reminded her.

There was something special about _Sakura _that she couldn't overlook. Was it just her kind smile she couldn't decide for now.

"He is lonely, much more now when I think about it." This time the emerald-eyed girl was thinking aloud.

They proceeded to talk about more congenial things before _Tomoyo _eventually announced that her break was almost over.

"Isn't it your day-off tomorrow? Would you like to go Christmas shopping with me?"

_Sakura _had that hopeful, pleading face again, and it was surprisingly harder to say no. There was no reason to refuse anyway. Her clever disguise was still going to deceive everybody.

She just wished she didn't have to deceive _Sakura _as well.

* * *

Quick notes:

**otōsan **- father

**hontō ni **- "Really."

**oniichan **- informal term for oniisan, which is older brother.


	16. 16

**A/N: **I would like to thank my readers' support. To **Property of Eriol**, some of your assumptions/questions will now be answered. To **Annonymous Amethyst**, thank you for the beautiful review. It helped me get over the depressing state of not getting enough feedback. LOL To all who wished for a speedy update, sorry for this delay.

* * *

Act 16, Winter

"_Eriol-sama_?"

The young man knew that his reaction was going to be too slow, almost as if he needed to tease the person calling out his name. He leisurely looked up from his hands on the black and white panels that seemed to mock him these past few days.

Music was not at all comforting for him this time. Concentration was so hard to achieve, and it had become utterly frustrating.

A silver-haired man, who worked as the keeper of the manor, bowed conscientiously before advancing towards him.

"What is it, _Yukito-san_?" His question easily echoed in the sparsely decorated room. The pianist had requested to move the grand piano to the former living room because it had good acoustics, but he couldn't appreciate that fact at the moment.

_Eriol _turned his attention back to the keys in front of him without so much thought. He had been too detached lately to be able to keep his interest in things. And lately, other people's company eluded him. Yet he wasn't at all surprised because he had anticipated it.

"I have brought you tea," his attendant announced as he carefully placed the steaming cup on the antique coffee table nearby.

He was sure it was Earl Grey because that was the only kind that _Yukito Tsukishiro_ served him since he came to _Fukuoka_.

The bespectacled pianist just mumbled his thanks but easily decided to neglect the drink. Its bitterness only reminded him of his relationship with his estranged father, _Clow Reed_, and he didn't want to deal with it in his mind tonight.

The housekeeper, who now was also his attending butler after _Wei _returned to _Tomoeda_, promptly left him alone to contemplate on his cheerless music again.

He was bound to participate in a competition next month, and he was physically, mentally and emotionally unprepared.

A tired sigh escaped his lips. The feeling of helplessness was threatening to overwhelm him once more.

The notes filled his thoughts as he willed his skilled fingers to move across the keys deftly. A random melody kept his concentration centered to what he was feeling for a while. His music would have confused anyone who would be listening. There was no order nor sense to it.

_Tomoyo Daidōji _would cross his mind so often now, and his guilt was consuming him day by day.

"It is not your fault, _oniichan_."

The small voice had to disrupt his delicate reflection, and he punctually stopped harassing the piano keys to glare at his pale hands. It would be unlikely of a _Hiiragizawa _to scowl at someone even when he was provoked.

"Everybody tells me that, _Sakura-chan_. But why can't I believe it?" His own voice rivaled the iciness of the weather but his cousin wasn't at all affected.

They grew up so close together to be able to tell that it was the frustration talking._ Sakura_ was a few years younger than him but the look on her pretty face made her seem much wiser than he could ever be, and it was unnerving in a way. The girl with the most emphatic emerald eyes slipped gracefully beside _Eriol_, sharing his space on the bench and absorbing some of his depressed air like a sponge.

He would never know how _Sakura _did that.

"I understand why you are upset. You wanted to help her," she told him peacefully that he visibly relaxed. "You must like her."

The dark-haired young man didn't acknowledge her last words as he watched _Sakura_'s hands move on the flats and sharps of the piano.

"I promised to keep her safe." The words were not all about chivalry because he was painfully aware that he was more than that now.

_Sakura _was playing a Beethoven piece, that one that he taught her years ago, and that one that also reminded him of the girl with the darkest hair and expressive amethyst eyes.

"Did you promise her that?"

This consciousness somehow disturbed him even more.

_No. I promised myself_.

His silence was compensated by his action to match his cousin's music. He was suddenly much more determined for some reason. There was strength in his euphony that mirrored his resolve.

"You must really like her," _Sakura _declared with a smile in her voice.

Those were _Syaoran's _words, too, and it had been more than a month ago.

"What is she like, _oniichan_?"

What was he going to say? His breath hitched as he tried to perceive her in his head.

_Tomoyo_ was unexpectedly talented, considerably captivating, and very mysterious.

_Is that all you know? _Even his mind was challenging him.

She was too stubborn, a little insecure, quite lonely, and somewhat broken inside.

After a few seconds, _Eriol Hiiragizawa _realized what was most important.

"She is just like me."


	17. 17

Act 17, Winter

Christmas was to come in less than a week now. Even the dreary town had looked much warmer and friendlier with the dancing lights and elaborate decorations that brought color to the dull scenery. Funny that the other people didn't notice there was something misplaced, that their auras anyway didn't reflect the warmth of the holiday.

The girl briefly closed her eyes, waiting for the gesture to interrupt her reverie. This practice had become a therapeutic routine for her.

There was still no snow but _Tomoyo_ was shivering despite of her over-sized coat. The former heiress was grasping its meticulously hand-stitched lining when she realized that the expensive wool never belonged to her. The masculine coat was borrowed, and it didn't feel right that she was using it again.

_How about the scarf? Doesn't it still smell like Eriol Hiiragizawa?_

She instinctively brought a delicate hand to her neck, settling carefully on the soft indigo scarf wrapped around there. Sandalwood scent stubbornly stuck even if she had used the scarf often.

She blinked.

There was that intoxicating scent that wafted through her most sensitive of senses when she gingerly made that slight movement to adjust the warmer, reminding the raven-haired girl of how it only belonged to her _senpai_.

She blinked again.

A picture of how _Eriol_ had stood too close to her in the subway train flashed before her eyes. The unwelcome distraction was as infuriating as her teasing imagination that it prompted her pulse to quicken.

"_Mō_!" At her exasperated utterance, the boy standing nearby started in surprise.

_Tomoyo_ muttered an apology as she colored. Closing her eyes wouldn't push her thoughts of him at the back of her mind.

She was sure because it had happened before.

A shiver ran through her body and the hair on her nape bristled, but the cold draft wasn't what caused them this time. She had turned her back away from the street now, gaze dropping to the clear window of the electronic shop when she sensed that somebody was watching her.

_

* * *

Sakura_ was flustered when she had called him after lunch the very next day. His cousin had explained in an almost incomprehensible manner how her unexpected meeting with her manager would keep her busy for a few more hours. He had no idea that she even left for _Tokyo_ that morning.

_"__I'm on vacation, oniichan. I thought they were serious when they gave me the break. But I guess they really don't seem to understand the concept of vacations!"_

It was not normal for _Sakura_ to complain because, besides her uncanny understanding of things, she knew what she got herself into when she accepted the modeling job. But he guessed that she was probably just upset about having to cancel her afternoon plans this way.

_"__Nee...would you do me a favor? I'm supposed to go shopping with a friend, and I have no way of telling her that I won't make it. Would you see her and apologize for me?"_

Eriol might as well envision how _Sakura_'s pout looked that moment.

_"Onegaishimasu."_

He couldn't help but think that maybe it was _Sakura_'s way of pulling him out of his personal exile. However, _Eriol_ didn't particularly believe there was much it could do to lift his mood but he acceded anyway. He actually owed _Tōya'_s _imōto_ for keeping him sane in the quiet family house. It was ironically difficult to meditate with his music when there was no one else around. He badly needed to see something stimulating besides the four walls of his disturbed mind.

He found himself diligently driving in _Hakata _not a little later, nearing the town plaza where most the shops had centered. Parking the car was easy in spite of the rush of shoppers, and thankfully, it didn't take him long to spot the electronic store where this girl, _Aya_, should be waiting for his cousin.

There was a boy standing beside a petite girl in a messy coiffure and a coat two sizes bigger than her frame.

It was somehow hard to focus on the image before him if the passing breeze kept on ruffling his bangs to his eyes.

Before he could take several more steps closer, the boy was now walking away just as the dark-haired girl turned to face the window display of the televisions on sale. _Sakura_ hadn't exactly given him an exact reference of what her friend should look like, but the girl in front of the store seemed like she was expecting someone.

Nobody else was waiting where the girls should meet, and it was almost five o'clock.

_Eriol_ was about to call out when the televisions suddenly flickered with static. It took the confused girl a few seconds to realize what was happening. There must be a camera that was capturing the scene right outside the shop because there was no mistaking the clear image on the televisions.

She blinked rapidly at the multiple faces before her.

He could swear his heartbeat stopped at the sight of that beautiful blushing face on the largest screen.

* * *

She felt her panic rising rapidly when she saw her captured face, a thousand possibilities devouring her all at once.

_Oh, no. That didn't just happen. Okaasama is definitely going to find me._

_Tomoyo_ could taste the bile creeping in to her throat, threatening to spill further in each passing second. A delicate hand rose to her mouth as she fought the vomit. The world seemed to spin uncontrollably in her eyes.

It was hard to even trust her own disguise, and now this carelessness could cost her freedom.

_Gomen Sakura._

Without hesitation, the former heiress did what she knew best.

She ran.

_

* * *

It can't be._ These were the only words the pianist's mind could articulate before this girl tore herself away from the window and darted to her left, the coat billowing after her despite its weight.

His own shock wouldn't allow his voice to come out.

_Wait!_

The girl was going to disappear if he didn't come out of it soon.

"_Matte_!"

Unfortunately, she wasn't stopping at all as if she didn't register his call, still blindly fighting against the tide of other busy shoppers.

How slim were the chances of finding her this way?

His temples throbbed painfully and his skin prickled in anticipation.

Thankfully, the rest of his body reacted faster than his brain ever could that moment, a sure hand reaching the girl's shoulder in no time.

"Let me go! I'm not who you think I am!"

She was hysterically yelling at his startling touch as she tried to pull away.

_Eriol_ struggled to make her understand that he wasn't a stranger while he firmly held her quivering shoulders still. She was squirming in his hands, trembling like a trapped animal.

"_Daidōji-san_, please. It's me."

When her eyes met his, he didn't expect to see horrified grey eyes instead of clear amethyst. Her ebony hair had come undone at her struggle and only then it struck him that it wasn't what he remembered it to be. The cascading tresses were cropped in a length too short now.

Did he make a mistake? How could this terrified woman before him look painfully like his _kohai _but not quite so? Was he beginning to imagine any girl with dark hair and pale skin as _Tomoyo Daidōji_?

Perhaps he was just imagining again. Maybe he really was obsessed now. There was no other logical explanation.

But this young woman's tensed shoulders eventually relaxed at the dawn of dazed recognition, eyes wide and glassy.

"_Hiiragizawa-san_?" It came out as a pitiful whisper that pierced his heart.

No. He was right after all. He wasn't seeing things, because after all only she could look so vulnerable like that.

_

* * *

Tomoyo_ couldn't believe what she was actually seeing.

_Am I hallucinating?_

Could she be too desperate that she was delusional now?

_Is this really—_

"_Hiiragizawa-san_?" Her eyes stung not because of the whipping cold.

"_Kami-sama_, it really is you."

Her small and trembling hands found the plains of his chest before her fingers curled, grasping what they could frantically seize. She couldn't remember why she was out that afternoon anymore or why she was running back to her apartment. It was so surreal, his presence in _Hakata_ after all this time.

Had he known she was going to be in this place, waiting for him to find her? His face was hard to read but those bright sapphire eyes wouldn't lie. He was just as relieved to see her again.

"I found you at last," he sighed his utter relief, his declaration the most pleasant music in her ears.

There was no stopping those tears from spilling to her face this time. She couldn't care where she was at the moment, couldn't feel the dense Winter snow finally descending on this part of _Fukuoka_. She had been alone to care about anything anymore.

"_Yokatta_," she whispered brokenly, falling against him with her usual reserve forgotten. The heavy weight in her chest was lifted. "_Honto ni yokatta_."

She never cried like that in years.

* * *

Quick notes:

**imōto - **little sister

**matte **- "Wait."

**Kami-sama** - God

**honto ni yokatta **- "I'm really glad."


	18. 18

**A/N: **I have a crazy updating spree because my dad brought his laptop with him and this chapter had been in my email since forever. hehe Thank you for all who reviewed. I promised **Property of Eriol **that I will dedicate this chapter to her. She said I shouldn't because people will think she's a saint. LOL Special thanks to **cheng **and **michibun **for inspiring me. Love you, guys!

* * *

Act 18, Winter

The joke was really on them. All this time they were in the same prefecture, in the same town, thinking they would never see each other again after he came off of that train, and then _Sakura Kinomoto_, who could have gone some other town library that fateful day, also had to be doctor _Tōya Kinomoto_'s little sister. The former heiress never made the connection between their last names because she never thought they could ever be related. That, or she may have forgotten the doctor's name altogether. She only met the physician once anyway, some few months ago in an incident that involved concussions and sermons.

The panorama changed drastically from the forced season decorations on the grey edifices to a secluded estate in the top of the hill. The family house was an hour drive from downtown _Hakata_ where she currently resided, _Tomoyo_ noted mentally while she watched the looming trees that resembled multiple archways pass by.

She didn't want to think it was coincidence. _Eriol_ must really be destined to find her soon enough even without depending on his instructions for her. It was a peculiar notion that she couldn't accept because she didn't believe in it.

"Young Master," a silver-haired man in a casual _haori_ and _hakama_ greeted them when they arrived.

"_Tadaima_."

There was an undeniably pleased note in _Eriol_'s deep voice, something that probably didn't happen a lot because the man with golden brown eyes gaped as if he couldn't believe what he just heard.

"_Okaerinasai_," he genially responded with a bow when he recovered.

"_Aa_..._Yukito_-_san_, I've brought a guest with me. This is _Tomoyo Daidōji_."

It was the girl's turn to make a respectful bow.

"_Hajimemashite_."

"She'll be staying here indefinitely so I would appreciate it if the guest room is prepared right away."

"I'm terribly sorry for the trouble," _Tomoyo_ apologized, blushing in shame for this arrangement. It wasn't necessary but _Eriol_ had insisted she stayed with them after seeing her uncomfortable living conditions. Her apartment was small that it was barely tolerable for one person. She had a make-shift _futon_ and no furniture, not even a low dining table, and the radiator just had to refuse to work when she needed it to. The _senpai_ didn't know what to make of her experience these few weeks, his surprise evidently written on his face as he surveyed her room. _Tomoyo _inwardly winced at the thought the he might probably be thinking that this was just the perfect retribution for an heiress who wanted her selfish freedom. This was exactly the consequence that her mother was talking about if she refused to return to _Osaka_. Her nights had been usually cold and she barely had anything to sustain herself everyday. She had become too thin as well.

She briefly wondered if _Tōya _would notice how unhealthy she looked now when they would meet again.

"Oh, please, don't be. It'll be my pleasure to be of service. Welcome to the _Amamiya_ house."

_Eriol_ made a coughing noise, and _Yukito_ was quick to ask if his master was alright.

"Don't worry. I never felt any better." A graceful smile enhanced his expression.

The servant, though a little hesitant at first, finally excused himself before he readily gathered her things that mostly consisted of a few clothes.

"_Sakura_-_chan_ is going to be stuck in _Tokyo_ until tomorrow so we'll probably see her in two days if she could escape her manager." The bespectacled pianist winked good-naturedly.

She knew it was belated to feel any embarrassment now after she practically threw herself to him in public while she cried. The _senpai_ had placed a comforting hand at the back of her head and hadn't moved until she had exhausted herself from weeping.

All these thoughts made her flush anyway. How awkward she felt now that everything was back to normal.

* * *

"_Daidōji_-_san_? Is there something wrong?"

_Tomoyo_ had frozen in her tracks just after he winked at her, a pretty blush tainting her porcelain cheeks.

That had been so out of character of him to do, but _Yamazaki_'s antics were probably rubbing in on him now, he supposed.

_Great. Shamelessly flirt with her and then drive her away. _

When did he start having a mocking conscience? He knew he had asked her a question, but it easily drifted away from his thoughts. Those pale contacts she wore that afternoon were finally gone. Only shining amethyst eyes were gazing at his sapphire ones now, and it was strangely comforting.

"I'm sorry. I always seem to forget to promptly thank you."

Did she really need to thank him? It was his fault that she had to go through all this because it was his idea that she run to _Fukuoka_, moreover he had to be too weak to leave the hospital, too, and delay everything. _Tomoyo_ _Daidōji_ would probably have done better if she headed to _Hiroshima_ and not have lived pathetically in that poor excuse of a living space as she hoped that she be saved from this fate.

_Did she even have enough to eat everyday? _The mere thought of it filled him with annoyance and shame.

"I don't know how or when I will be able to repay you for helping me, but I assure you that I will," she declared, unyielding determination reflecting in her eyes. "And if there is any favor, anything that I may be able to do at all, please tell me."

The young woman must have experienced quite an ordeal but here she was, bowing before him in pure humility and sincerity as if she hadn't been abandoned.

"Stop it, please. I should be the one saying it,_ Daidōji_-_san_."

Maybe it was really unnecessary that he involved himself with the _Daidōji_ heiress' business. The sensible part of him never failed to remind him over and over again, but right that moment when she broke down under the snowing skies he was overcome by a strong desire to protect her from her fears. How dangerous was her mother, he didn't have an answer to that, and he could only imagine how scared and paranoid her daughter would always be with her, knowing how she didn't hesitate to hurt her before.

There was no trace of those tears in her face anymore but her small figure and tired eyes mirrored her frailty.

"Forgive me for not coming to you sooner just as I had promised. Something could have happened while I was not there and—"

A small hand instantly calmed that building storm in his chest as it rested softly on his arm. _Tomoyo_ had moved sometime between his speech and reflection, stopping him in time before he voiced out all his frustrations and horrors.

"Those days are gone now. There's no use for regrets," she wisely told him, a small smile weaved in her lips as she looked up at him. "That is why we are given the present to make up for the past, to start all over again, right?"

Maybe he survived the coma and recovered from it so that he could find her again.

Maybe this time he wouldn't have to completely abandon music.

Maybe this girl was right.

_Eriol_ nodded before he realized that _Tomoyo_ had removed her hand from his arm and had turned her gaze toward the wide window panels. There was not much to see with the darkness outside, and the viciously howling wind was barely audible.

"Do you think it will snow again tomorrow?" Her query sounded rhetorical and he would never know what she was really thinking.

Maybe he would always be lured to her vulnerability and her secrets like this.

"Do you want it to snow?" _Eriol_ asked back, curious of her reply.

There was no need for words because her brighter smile was enough for an answer.

* * *

**A/N: **It's called Amamiya house because...if Eriol and Sakura were to be cousins, then the ancestral home should be named Amamiya. LOL If you guys watched the anime, Sakura's mom was Amamiya before she married Fujitaka. :D

* * *

Quick notes:

**haori **- traditional coat worn over the kimono.

**hakama **- a type of pants.

**tadaima **- "I'm home." (I had this translated before but you probably have forgotten about it)

**okaerinasai **- "Welcome home."

**hajimemashite **- "Pleased to meet you." or "How do you do?"


	19. 19

**A/N:** hahahahahahaha I'm possessed because I'm updating faster than I make my dissertations. T_T I'm going to warn you, guys. Boring chapter ahead. But this is still necessary so please bear with me. :) Thank you **Property of Eriol**, **Annonymous Amethyst **and my former teammate, **lu** for the reviews. Enjoy, guys. :)  
**

* * *

**

Act 19, Winter

_Tomoyo_ still went to work the next day but this time it was _Yukito_ who drove her downtown. His master was suddenly off the weather, coughing all morning that he could barely lay a finger on the piano without the occasional spasm.

"Is _Hiiragizawa_-_san_ alright?" The dark-haired young woman asked, wondering if _Sakura_ was referring to _Eriol_ when she talked about the cousin with a lung disease. The bespectacled pianist seemed seriously sick when they left the house.

There was one more curb before they finally arrived in front of the town library.

"_Kinomoto_-_sensei_ is coming home tonight and _Akizuki_-_san_ will be with him. They will take care of the young master. Do not worry about it, _Daidōji_-_dono_." The servant just smiled at her before they made a stop.

"I apologize for the trouble again, _Yukito_-_san_." Her embarrassment was obvious in her voice as she hunched to him.

He merely waved off her apology again with another simple smile before driving back to the house.

It was only when the car disappeared around the bend did _Tomoyo_ realize that _Yukito_ had not given a straight answer to her question.

* * *

What the hell was wrong with him? He was supposed to be recovering from the last attack and not going through a retrograde condition.

The pianist heaved a lungful of air, trying to control the persistent pain in his chest. It hardly relieved him though.

He removed the annoying glasses despite the appeal of his eyes for clearer vision.

Never mind if he could barely make out the following bars of the next movement of this complicated piano piece because he had it memorized anyway. Long fingers ran across unkempt ebony strands. The palm of his hand had been too clammy as he felt his own forehead.

_Too warm to be normal._

He hadn't ceased coughing and now he was coming down with a fever. It was just what he needed when he had barely three weeks to practice for the competition. _Terada_ was going to be really disappointed. Just like how _Clow_ _Reed_ was with him.

* * *

He was having a dream, that one that wouldn't want him to wake up until he was completely spent, and that same one that he didn't want to be in.

"_Eriol_?"

He really shouldn't be in his six year old body.

"Mother?"

The cloudy mist dissolved quickly. A few heartbeats later a picture of an elegant room came into focus, and the vision of a very familiar woman floated before him.

He always thought she was exceptionally beautiful in that dress, the shade of the chiffon matching the green of her eyes.

The boy willed his body to rise but realized that he couldn't. He was in his bed again, frail and sick with the disease.

"Why do you look so sad, Mother?" His mother had smiled but he could read the sadness in her fair face even if he was only a child.

"_Nadeshiko_..." She might as well have tears in her eyes when she mentioned her cousin's name.

"Is Auntie still in the hospital?"

Her long, straight hair moved with her when she shook her head.

"No, _Eriol_. She...she died this morning."

"Is it going to happen to me, too, Mother?" It was the most innocent, heart-breaking question a child could ever ask. There was no fear in his voice because he didn't understand what death was supposed to mean. He shouldn't even have this disease.

This graceful, lithe woman with the kindest eyes and the softest voice gently enclosed all of the little boy's fragile form.

"I am not going to allow it, my darling. Mother won't allow it."

The warmth she radiated was so real that _Eriol_ never realized he was only being held by a ghost of the past.

* * *

"The weather report says there's going to be a blizzard in _Fukuoka_ tonight and I want to have the library closed before it even starts snowing," her superior announced to the only employees in the building. "Blizzard in _Fukuoka_, that would be a sight to watch. It shouldn't even snow here to begin with."

It was a relief that the old man was dismissing them already because _Tomoyo_ couldn't help the nagging feeling she had all morning. Perhaps it had something to do with her cryptic conversation with _Yukito_, she wasn't really certain but she just had to get back to the manor as soon as possible.

* * *

They found him in his room, barely able to make it to his bed with only half of his body sprawled on top of the sheets. It looked like he had collapsed as he tried to get himself to rest.

"He is very warm," _Tomoyo_ worriedly stated, carefully touching _Eriol_'s flushed cheeks with both hands when he was finally settled comfortably on the bed. "He is burning, _Yukito_-_san_."

_Yukito_ looked guilty as he fought to keep an even face. He had already been instructed by _Tōya_ himself to keep the young master in bed if he got sick again. The servant had tried but _Eriol_ had also insisted that he could handle it.

"I had given him his medicine right before we left. It seems like it worked because he's stopped wheezing. We just need to bring his temperature down for now."

By the time the servant came with a cold compress, _Eriol _was almost gasping for air but it appeared as if it was an after effect of crying.

"I have to check when exactly the doctor is coming home and maybe ask him if it's best to bring _Eriol_-_sama_ to the hospital."

_Tomoyo_ nodded once before averting her attention to the resting man.

_Eriol_ stirred once, eyes fluttering briefly before he incoherently moaned a few words.

"Is there something you want me to get you, _Hiiragizawa_-_san_?" She was almost whispering the question, afraid that she may startle him if she spoke any louder.

The young man ceased the little actions instantly then looked right at her.

"I am scared," he said in a flimsy, hoarse note that _Tomoyo_ couldn't ignore.

He was suddenly speaking in English after all, accent thick and undeniably British. _Eriol_ didn't make anymore movements as he lain hauntingly still, his breathing shallow.

"Scared of what?"

She was already leaning really close at this, straining to hear. Her pulse was probably louder in her ears.

"Dying."

The former heiress couldn't help but flinch at his reply, eyes widening in horror.

"You are not dying, _Hiiragizawa_-_san_!" She sounded terrified of the possibility as she practically choked at her own stern rejoinder.

_Eriol_ was still staring straight at her face as if testing her but only then she figured that he wasn't seeing her at all. He probably didn't even recognize who she was. There was a glazed effect in those azure eyes that belied his delusional state. However, his words still undoubtedly reflected his subconscious thoughts.

_How could you have these horrible thoughts, Hiiragizawa-san?_

"Rest, _onegai_," the girl ultimately pleaded as she pretended to fuss on the insignificant creases of his patterned mattress. Despite of her anxious hands she managed to bring the thick blanket to the _senpai_'s chest. "We want you to get better. You don't want to worry _Sakura_-_chan_ or _Kinomoto_-_sensei_, do you?"

Her speech was back to Japanese, easing _Eriol_ to either wake up from this daze or fall to a restful sleep. He had finally closed his eyes at her gentle coaxing, relaxing at last as if her words were the only cure to his delusional state of mind.

Her fingers bravely swept those bangs away from his handsome face before she methodically fixed a compress on his forehead.

"You are going to be fine. I promise," _Tomoyo _whispered brokenly. It seemed as if she was the one who needed convincing.

This peaceful look suited him more than the disturbing calmness from just a few minutes ago, and she could stare at this unguarded condition forever.

"Don't go away, _Daidōji_-_san_," he mumbled one more time just when she was convinced he had finally fallen asleep.

She blinked, bemused again.

_Had he known who was with him after all?_

The bed sank a little to the side where she had quietly set herself. _Eriol_ lifted an unsteady hand which _Tomoyo_ simply caught, trapping it between her own. This aching display of frailty touched something in her but she ignored the uncomfortable flutter in her stomach.

"_Hitori_ _ja_ _nai_."

* * *

Quick notes:

**onegai - **"Please."

**hitori ja nai **- "You are not alone."


	20. 20

**A/N: **Midterms are around the corner and I really should be concentrating on my gazillion homework and reports. I'd like to thank **apple** and **Property of Eriol** for loving chapter 19. :) **Annonymous Amethyst**, here is the quickest update that I promised you about. :)

* * *

Act 20, Winter

The steady buzz of the blizzard was supposed to lull _Tomoyo_ to sleep but there she was, wide awake, uncomfortable in her borrowed night dress, and mindful of the littlest of noises outside her room. Her heart was as heavy as lead, and it was particularly vexing that her own mind wouldn't let her rest even at fourteen minutes past twelve o'clock. Without waiting for another second to pass, the girl liberated herself from the confines of the guest room, sauntering confidently in the darkness as she lead herself to _Eriol_'s quarters.

His unlikely question still disturbed her, and she wanted to be assured again that he wasn't delusional anymore.

She quietly padded on.

Though the _Amamiya_ house was traditionally Japanese in structure and had a lot of rooms it was fairly effortless to find her _senpai_'s door. It was the only door that had a dimmed light coming from the gap anyway while all others implied they were empty.

She already had a hand on the sliding door when she suddenly wavered.

_This is wrong. I shouldn't even be here. _

"_Daidōji-chan_."

It was _Nakuru_ who found her still standing there, undecided and awkward. _Tomoyo_ bowed to her, wondering if the older woman could notice her timid smile in the dark.

"Do you want to see _Eriol-san_?" The nurse asked her as she opened the door. Despite the faint shade, the light was oppressive as it fell partially outside the room, and _Nakuru_ could clearly insinuate that expression of dilemma on her face now.

"I wasn't going to...actually, I was just—"

She knew she was blushing, and the girl didn't understand why it seemed wrong to be caught stuttering like that.

"The floor is cold, and you are barefoot. Come inside."

Whatever the older woman had read in her body language, she brushed it aside. But the she was still suddenly embarrassed as she stepped in the carpeted room.

The warmth of the room was infinitely inviting compared to the cold of the floorboards.

"I don't want to distract you of what you're doing, _Akizuki-san_."

"It's not a problem," _Nakuru_ told her as she set aside the syringe and medicine on the lamp table. "I was just making sure _Eriol-san_ has his medicine ready when he should have it."

The ebony-haired girl took the seat in the other side of the bed, embarrassment gradually dissolving into mild unease.

They watched _Eriol_ sleeping for a few minutes before _Tomoyo_ started speaking, voice oddly shallow and breaking in the air.

There were things that bothered her even before doctor _Kinomoto _and his assistant arrived from their trip and attended on _Eriol_.

"Is there a cure?" She didn't have to elaborate or explain what she meant because her tone already suggested her thoughts.

_Nakuru_'s gaze flew to her face, looking uncertain of how to reveal the true nature of _Eriol_'s disease to her.

"I'm afraid _Eriol-san_ has to bear with it for the rest of his life," the nurse told her after a moment's hesitation.

_Tomoyo_ didn't know why but it just felt like she suddenly couldn't breathe. Her amethyst eyes that looked golden in the lamp light were actually shining with tears.

"_Hiiragizawa-san_ said...he said is scared of dying."

The doctor's assistant didn't particularly look surprised at her statement but there was a sad gleam in her own eyes.

"_Kinomoto-sensei _just recently decided to specialize in lung conditions so that he can save him." The nurse's own voice was notably sympathetic but also proud. Just like _Yukito_, she had refused to give her a straight response.

_Tomoyo'_s eyes fell on _Eriol'_s profile in the soft, yellow light again, wondering if _Tōya's_ mother's fate also had to do with his decision to become a physician. Whatever other reason he had, her respect for the older _Kinomoto _anyway grew significantly.

"There is nothing to worry now, _Daidōji-chan_. Everything will be fine."

She tried not to think about how haunted _Eriol _had looked when he stared at her that afternoon. There was no other way but to be hopeful for him.

The silence unnervingly draped over the two women before _Nakuru _decided to break it.

"I am going to tell you a story. This may change your impression of him but you also need to understand. _Eriol-san_...he's braver than you think, but he's had a complicated childhood and that's probably why he's suddenly afraid. I first met him when he was only twelve. When the _Kinomoto_s took him in, he could speak very little Japanese and wouldn't mingle with his cousins, yet he was amazing with the piano, and he played like a prodigy."

The nurse only delayed her absorbed narration when she had to apply a fresh cold compress on _Eriol_'s forehead.

"At first look I could tell he was a lonely boy. In England, the other children couldn't relate to him and so he didn't have a lot of friends. Everybody regarded him as _Clow Reed_'s bastard child. His parent's never married, and when they suddenly ended their relationship it was _Eriol-san_ who suffered. It didn't help any that _Clow Reed_ wouldn't acknowledge him or his obvious talent."

"Why would he do something like that?"

"I think he got frustrated of his son's disease. _Eriol-san_, though very talented, was a very sickly child."

_Tomoyo_'s frown deepened.

"But shouldn't _Clow_ _Reed_ have been more of a father because of his condition?"

_Nakuru_ didn't have an answer for her.

"It's such a shame, _ne_. He's grown to be just like his father. _Clow Reed_ just has to see it before it's too late."

What _Terada _said before seemed sensible now. Her _senpai_ had been trying his best to get noticed by his own father.

_All he wants is to be accepted. He is chasing after a love that eludes him._

"And _Hiiragizawa-san_'s mother...what happened to her?"

This time the comely nurse looked as if she didn't want to even finish her account. There was something in her golden eyes that told her that she couldn't say anything more and the truth shouldn't come from her.

"_Nakuru-san_?"

The air was heavier and it seemed as if the walls had edged closer around them, depriving them from any little comfort.

She sighed once before she looked at _Tomoyo _square in the face. Both of them realized that the former heiress had to understand.

"She died of overdose of sleeping pills. Nobody could dare to say that it was deliberate because she didn't seem like she was someone who would do something so careless and leave her son all alone. But at the back of people's minds, they knew for certain it was no accident. She was depressed for too long, and that was why she had sent his son to _Japan _to be taken care by his only relatives."

So it all made sense now, why her general feelings for him before was that he was someone who was mostly removed and distant despite any stimulation.

The amethyst-eyed girl swallowed the painful lump in her throat.

"I am really sorry to hear this."

"I am, too, but I am just grateful that he has a family now. He is going to live."

_Eriol Hiiragizawa_'s experience was something that anybody shouldn't even have to go through at all. Yet despite his wretched past, _Hiiragizawa_ _Eriol_ came to be the man who quietly offered her his umbrella in the rain when she first came to _Tomoeda_, the same one who stepped up against the harassing American customer in _Aoiya_, the same one who caught her as she fell from the emergency exit in their dormitory, and the same one who finally found her in the streets of _Hakata. _

Seeing him so helpless like this made her emotional, and her vision blurred again with unshed tears.

The women sat together for a while, observing the rise and fall of _Eriol_'s chest in peace. The companionable silence allowed them to contemplate of the day's events and their own separate feelings, and to wish for things to look brighter in the morning to come.

**

* * *

A/N: **Aaaaa...I don't know what happened. The original version of the chapter didn't have Eriol's mother's story but it would seem lacking without it, anyway, and I don't want to keep her alive. LOL I hope I didn't overdo the chapter with all explanations. :/ Everybody's half an orphan, and I just noticed that. Wow.


	21. 21

**A/N: **Thank you for all who reviewed. **Apple **and **cheng **were quick to respond after I posted. LOL Please read and review. :)

* * *

Act 21, Winter

"_Daidōji_ _Tomoyo_." _Sakura_ uttered her name as if challenging her.

The former heiress swallowed nervously and then made a meek gesture of assent, unsure of how to act around her friend under this scrutiny because it was hard if she was looking at her like that. Nobody had explained to _Sakura_ until she got back from the urgent business call that _Aya_ was now living in the _Amamiya_ house, and that _Aya_ wasn't exactly her real name as well.

The emerald-eyed girl circled _Tomoyo_ once in the most agonizingly slow manner, making the latter fidget.

She hadn't expected _Tōya_'s sister to easily accept her explanation of her deception but she didn't think _Sakura_ would inspect her this way either.

The dark-haired girl squirmed on her chair again.

The younger _Kinomoto_ sniffed before she finally faced _Tomoyo_.

"You still look and smell like the same girl I met in the library." Surprisingly, there was no derision in her light tone.

"_Eh_?"

"And react the same way, too!"

_Tomoyo_'s bewildered expression was priceless to behold.

"_Sakura-chan_, I—"

Her friend held a hand up, grinning cheekily and obviously enjoying the whole act.

"_Nai_ _nai_ _nai_. Don't even start again. It was necessary, a disguise, I get it. It's just that everything sort of blew me away. Who would have thought the girl _oniichan_ was telling me about is also my friend?"

Her confusion was plainly written on her face._ Tomoyo_ didn't know why _Tōya_ would even talk about her at all.

"Thank you, I guess..."

"_Sugoi_! You can definitely stay with us for as long as you like!"

"_Oh_. I'd hate to abuse your hospitality—"

"That's the most absurd notion, _Tomoyo_-_chan_. Christmas is in a few days. Did you actually think I am going to let you mope alone in your apartment on that day while my family is having a party here?"

"A party?" Her eyebrows had risen.

_Sakura_ nonchalantly smoothed her blouse after she removed an nonexistent lint on the fabric.

"_Un_. We host a party and dress up and enjoy our family and friends' company," the girl explained, pleased that she was the one telling _Tomoyo_ this. Then the expression on her face shifted noticeably, softening in the glow of the sunlight as if remembering a happy memory. "We do it every year like sort of a reunion. We see the people we don't usually see."

A snort interrupted the girls' conversation.

"I sure hope you're not talking about the _gaki_."

"_Aniki_!"

_Tōya_ was leaning his back on the door frame, his built readily melting against it and his scowl in place.

"Who is he talking about?" _Tomoyo_ whispered her question but she might as well announced it out loud.

"No one!" _Sakura_ cried back at her friend that poor _Tomoyo_ could only blink at her outburst.

"_Anō_..."

"_Jaa_, I have a gorgeous _kimono_ that I would like you to wear in the party. It's going to be perfect."

She was undeniably defensive all of a sudden, bright flags still staining her face despite her attempt to change the subject. It was hard to tell if her brother had just come in the living room to bait her or to amuse himself. Seeing _Tōya_'s conceited expression the dark-haired young woman guessed it was both. _Nakuru_ had walked in just as _Tōya_ started to look bored.

"You're up," the doctor stated his wonder, straightening up from his slouch at the presence of his assistant. "Shouldn't you still be sleeping?"

_Nakuru_ had stayed up most of night to keep watch of his cousin's condition until _Tōya_ relieved her.

The comely nurse beamed at the girls.

"And miss out on the fun? We're on vacation, _Tōya_-_kun_," she purposely drawled the honorific to tease him, rolling her golden eyes in mirth. Somehow there was suspicious color on her cheeks when she turned to the girls.

"_Ohayō_ _minna-san_. What are we up to today?"

"A party! And we are going to prepare for it." _Sakura_ happily announced, clapping her hands and almost bouncing.

"Only a _kaijuu_ gets excited like that."

_Tomoyo_ couldn't stop her giggle on time and her friend had seen her amusement of the situation.

"_Hoe_!"

_Nakuru_ shot an effective glare in the doctor's way.

"Ignore him, _Sakura-chan_. We'll have our revenge soon."

"_Oi_. What could you possibly do to avenge my sister, _Nakuru_?" _Tōya_ challenged the nurse with a raised eyebrow. They had readily dropped the professional front and fell to a comfortable familiarity that was built through the years.

"Prep up your sister for a certain _gaki_. Wouldn't you just love that?" It was easy to tell she relished the idea of borrowing his own terms and that grimace on his youthful face while she taunted him further with a snicker.

_Sakura_ had blushed again, disconcerted that she was still somehow the receiving end of the dispute.

Despite the childish banter the adults in the room enjoyed themselves, completely oblivious of the emerald-eyed girl's embarrassment or her friend's curiosity. All of a sudden, _Tomoyo_ was envious for the first time, and she wished she had a family like _Sakura_'s. She hated that she had to run away from her own mother like this and be alone in Christmas and possibly for the rest of her life.

"You're doing it again, _Tomoyo_-_chan_." She wasn't really alone anymore.

"Doing what?"

She couldn't thank _Eriol_ _Hiiragizawa_ enough.

"Spacing out. Come on. Let's go see _Eriol_-_nii_ now."

_

* * *

Tōya_ was still whining about how _Eriol_ wouldn't stop playing the piano when he should be resting. _Sakura_ said something about her cousin being a workaholic while he was inspired, her brother, however, simply tagged it as inappropriate manic manifestation.

"I am not obsessed," _Eriol_ fought back with conviction. "I've wasted too much time getting sick. I need to practice for the concourse."

"Which is funny because you're bound to get sick again with the stress."

"It won't even come to that point, _oniisan_."

It appeared like _Tōya_ was about to gravely retaliate, and _Nakuru_ was quick to physically steer the doctor away from _Eriol_ before they could start another wave of argument. She was always sensitive like that and the pianist was grateful for the interruption.

He couldn't stop now. He had to concentrate on rehearsing the two pieces. _Terada_, who acted as his mentor, would have expected nothing less of him. Inevitably, one of the loose pages of the second piece slid gracefully on the floor, and he abruptly stopped playing to pick it up. That same time another pale hand was reaching for it.

Curious sapphire met dazed amethyst.

_Eriol_ wondered if _Tomoyo_ had also felt the variation in the air between them. Neither could move for a few seconds until the girl's pink flush crept to her neck and ears, and when they started to they jerked too sharply and consequently bumped their heads together.

"I'm sorry, _Hiiragizawa-san_," the young woman blurted first, still caressing a growing bump just above her temple.

"No, I apologize. I moved too soon." He grinned awkwardly as he fixed his glasses in place. "_Daijōbu desu ka_."

_Eriol_ helped the girl to the piano bench.

"It's nothing," the former heiress, who still seemed dizzy in his eyes, tried to assure him.

"Are you sure?"

She beamed that sophisticated smile and he was compelled to consciously turn to the doctored notes on the piano rest.

"Did I break your rehearsal? Forgive me. I shouldn't have—"

He laughed, the rich tone pleasantly ringing through the whole house.

"You really should stop it, _Daidōji-san_." The bespectacled man was still chuckling to himself as _Tomoyo_ tilted her head naively.

"Stop what? I'm sorry—"

"There you go again. Has anyone told you that you apologize too much?"

He may have found her habit amusing, but the former heiress just fell silent, her heliotrope orbs betrayed her discomfort at his careless jest. _Eriol_ groaned inwardly.

_I am now officially an idiot._

"_Sumimasen_. That was not funny. Actually, it was rather obtuse."

He slumped beside her and rested his head in his hands, suddenly exhausted though he didn't know why.

"Did it feel good though?" She was asking him as if he hadn't just offended her.

"What did?"

Right then he realized that _Tomoyo_ never had her hair down anymore since she stayed with them, and he was unexpectedly sorry.

_She's still exquisitely beautiful however._ That train of thought loudly crashed against the rational part of his mind.

"Laughing." _Tomoyo_ said it so naturally that he was transfixed even when she was playing the Ravel piece as she sight-read.

"I hadn't laughed like that in a very long time," _Eriol_ confessed, watching her expert fingers run across the keys.

"Then I'm glad that I made you laugh...even if it had to be in my expense." Her voice blended in the music she was making. "You have a beautiful laugh."

He dared to anticipate another color to manifest in her pale face but there was only a peaceful smile.

"_Arigatō_."

It was him who had too look away. He was probably the awkward one between the two of them.

* * *

Quick notes:

**nai** - no

**un **- yes

**aniki **- one's older brother (**A/N: **note that oniisan here is still used to refer to an older male. I did that to make a distinction of how Sakura calls Tōya and Eriol.)

**hoe **- (**A/N: **not really sure what this means but Sakura in anime and manga says this a lot.)

**kaijuu - **monster


	22. 22

**A/N: **Hahahahahahahaha dang it. This is it. I've reached my limit and the writer's block has caught up with me and my gazillion schoolwork. :( I thank **apple** and **cheng **for being the quickest to review in chapter 21 again. They inspired me, along with **Property of Eriol**, to post another update in less than 12 hours. :) Please be patient with me in the next few weeks because with midterms coming, there would be lesser opportunity to even visit fanficdotnet. huhu I hope you all understand. I suddenly hate school now. TAT

* * *

Act 22, Winter

Wearing very elaborate _kimono_s was not at all novel to _Tomoyo_. She had gone to formal functions with _Sonomi_ ever since she was old enough to comprehend the basic concepts of their textile business. As an heiress it was indispensable that she learned everything at an early age, but she hadn't paid too much attention to her lessons or hadn't exhibited a special fascination in fabrics except in designing. As expected, her mother never considered her talent flattering nor beneficial. Nothing was enough for the _Daidōji_ CEO, and just like she always did before, she had now resulted to another desperate action to get what she wanted.

The former heiress expertly secured her purple _obi_ in place. It was a deep hue that brought out the color of her eyes, and the rest of the dress was midnight black that complimented her alabaster complexion. The outer fabric that was decked with sparse silver-lined floral prints in olive green and fuchsia along with the crimson inner _kimono _were all made of fine silk.

How ironic that it should come from _Daidōji_ Textiles.

_How can I ever escape from you, Okaasama?_

"You are so beautiful, _Tomoyo-chan_!" _Sakura_ marveled at her friend's appearance in the full length mirror.

_Tomoyo_ shuffled a bit before staring at her reflection. She had seen this face a million times before but tonight she looked every bit like the _Daidōji_ heiress she was months ago. Her make-up was light and natural; her hair was coiffed with an opalescent butterfly pin with her graceful neck exposed completely; and her bangs were swept in one side, making her look a little more softer than usual.

"_Hontō desu ka_."

"I never lie."

Her lips shimmered as she brightly smiled to _Tomoyo_.

_Sakura_ wasn't bad herself. Her own _kimono_ was made of silk and had the color of jade that shone a different shade of green whenever she moved. Her intricate _obi_ was gold and an emerald dragon was embroidered tastefully in the front. Her stance was almost aristocratic but it would be attributed to her line of work, and probably to how she was brought up.

"Aren't we a little too overdressed for dinner? Do we really need to do this?"

"Of course, _Tomoyo-chan_! But we never overdress in this occasion. It's like cosplay, but only better."

_Cosplay?_

"Are you ready? I still need to find _Nakuru_-_nee_. I seem to have lost her. The guests are going to be here anytime soon."

"I will be in a bit. You may go without me."

_Sakura_ ran off to the receiving area and left _Tomoyo_ to stare at herself in the antique full-length mirror again.

A sigh left her breath and a small frown was fixed on her striking countenance.

_How could I feel so fake in this face?_

She didn't feel like herself at all tonight, and no amount of encouragement from _Sakura _could ever change her mind about herself.

After a few seconds of staring blankly at the space between her ear and shoulder in the mirror she finally decided to follow her energetic friend.

_Act happy! At least do it for Sakura-chan!_ Her mind thickly commanded just as she was passing by the dimmer rooms along the hallway with muted lights.

"No, this is just wrong."

_Tomoyo _thought she just imagined a woman's voice but there was no mistaking the rustling sounds from inside of that room.

_Akizuki-san?_

Her tall silhouette was easy to make out through the gap of the _shoji_ screens. The lights from outside the house pronounced the shadows, then suddenly another figure fluidly joined hers, one of a taller and masculine form.

"What is, _koishii_?"

His voice, though hushed, was husky and familiar in her ears.

_Nakuru_ was pulled towards the shadow closer that they were embracing.

"What if someone walks in on us and—"

The nurse was silenced just as the silhouettes were intimately joined when the taller form unexpectedly leaned in. It was a private moment that she shouldn't have witnessed at all.

_Tomoyo_ felt all blood leave her body only to gather in her head. She tried to will her feet to move but they wouldn't cooperate with her.

"_Sakura-chan_ is probably wondering where I disappeared to." _Nakuru_ had a breathy element in her voice after her lover released her.

"Nobody cares about the _kaijuu_."

The shadows became one figure again. She gasped as her eyes widened a fraction more.

_Kinomoto_-_sensei!_

All blood left her body completely now.

_I can't believe I am eavesdropping them!_

"Pray tell what is so interesting in there?"

The feathery caress of a voice against her ear made her jump, and she paled even more at the sight of him casually standing behind her.

"_Hiiragizawa-san_!" Her hiss was fortunately just a whisper, but her horror and embarrassment that she was caught listening in could never be consoled.

Upon seeing her guilty look the azure-eyed young man realized what she had just seen and then dragged her away from his cousin's door immediately.

"You didn't see anything." It was not simply a statement but an order.

"What?" She didn't know why she could barely catch up on his speech, mind suddenly hazy and confused once more.

"They think nobody knows about their secret," he went on, finally stopping at the entryway to the receiving area.

_So he also knows._

"They've been friends for years. Why keep a relationship they have now a secret?"

"I don't know." His eyebrows were in a knot, and the traditional _haori_ he was wearing was in slight disarray. Instinctively, the young woman's hands reached for his sleeves and meticulously smoothed the creases away. _Eriol_ tensed and could only gape at her, unsure of what inspired her to fuss. "But I know that their secret is not ours to tell." He was almost just breathing out the words, simply hypnotized of something the former heiresswas completely unaware of.

_Tomoyo_ nodded in understanding yet couldn't help but blush again. She couldn't get _Nakuru_ and _Tōya_'s moving shadows out of her head even if she tried. Was it momentary perverseness that prompted her to eavesdrop, she would never want to know. She was going to be embarrassed of this memory forever.

"_Daidōji-san_."

"Yes?" She hadn't realized until then that her thoughts had effortlessly drifted back to the young doctor and his comely nurse, and hadn't also realized that _Eriol_ wasn't wearing his glasses tonight. The heiress knew she was shamelessly staring, but her head refused to turn away.

He had the clearest blue eyes she had ever seen.

The air was different again just like it had been in the piano room two days ago.

"You are very beautiful today."

Her face was red for a completely different reason now, heart beating madly against her chest. The _senpai_ just complimented her, and she didn't know what to say or how to react to it, but she knew that she could believe his words more than she could with _Sakura_'s.

"_Aa_...thank you. Today's the party, and I didn't want to embarrass my hosts." She meant to say that the dress and the make-up did the trick for her but before she could even speak another word, the sides of _Eriol_'s elegant lips tugged upwards.

The young man held his graceful hand out for her to take.

_You are a fake, remember? You are not a sophisticated doll but a broken one._

Just that one time she denied her mocking thoughts of the satisfaction of disappointing her.

_Tomoyo Daidōji_ took his invitation, but grasped _Eriol Hiiragizawa_'s warm hand too tightly as if it were her only lifeline.

**

* * *

A/N: **Aha! Did you see that coming? LOL I bet you guys hadn't expected Nakuru and Tōya to be in that sort of relationship. And if you did, you are smart! Hahahahahahaha I'm going crazy. I really didn't sign up for all the schoolwork that came along with this course. I hate myself. T_T

* * *

Quick notes:

**obi - **the wide belt that secures the kimono in place.

**koishii **- endearment for a lover (i.e. darling, sweetheart, etc.).


	23. 23

**A/N:** Aaaw...I'm not sure which part in this chapter the drag started. I guess my mind is really too messed up now that school just took it's toll on me. Midterms is so depressing. I shouldn't even be writing the last half of the chapter while I'm doing a case study. huhu

Thank you very much to **cheng** and my good friend, **lu** for always encouraging me. Any mistakes you find, please PM me. :)

* * *

Act 23, Winter

She looked like a blossom nymph with her fragile grace and interesting garb that it was particularly difficult to tear his azure eyes away from that ethereally exquisite face of hers, and he fought valiantly to finally rest his greedy gaze at anything but her soft, appealing features. Her delicate movement and the feeble shuffle of her dress every time she made a step forward with him complemented the rhythmic waltz in his head.

This young woman couldn't have implied that it was just the unusual way she dressed up for the event that was flattering her quiet beauty. Though he had been fascinated by the way she prepared herself for the party, no silk _kimono_ or make-up could ever give justice to her august charm. He could attest to that because he had seen her in his practice room in _Terada_'s music school months ago, when she had decided to play Liszt on his piano and he had blurted out, quite impolitely, that she was beautiful. He was somehow obsessed since then but would never admit it even to himself.

Seeing that slight pout on her lips when she self-consciously accepted his observation tonight, she probably thought otherwise.

_Eriol_ clenched his fists.

He couldn't believe he was having these unbecoming thoughts about their guest. If anyone found out that he was suddenly attracted to _Tomoyo_ this way he was going to be perpetually mortified. The usually stoic pianist had never once regarded anyone this openly or had brazenly said his thoughts out loud, and this impulsive change of behavior should never really start now. Hearing her sing his hastily composed song this morning was addicting enough, and he had already fallen into the bad habit of making excuses to keep her in the piano room while he practiced in the last two days.

It just took him a moment to realize that he was in heap of trouble.

"_Hiiragizawa-san_?" _Tomoyo_'s musical voice breached his thoughts before he remembered where he was exactly and who he was with.

His gaze decidedly glided to her rosy mouth instead of her attractive amethyst eyes, a matter that was actually accidental. He asked her what was wrong and immediately those plump lips mouthed the response a little too languorously before his eyes.

_Is she bent on teasing me?_

"Forgive me. I didn't get that."

This was the same hypnotism he was trapped in a few minutes ago, when he first had the chance to really study her in the golden glow while she was fixing his _haori_ with compulsive subtlety, but this time it seemed like he was falling terribly deeper in the trance.

"Your hand. You are hurting me." The embarrassed tone matched her blush and only when _Tomoyo_ tried to pry her entwined fingers did he only completely snap out of the daze.

"_Aa_...forgive me," the pianist managed to croak as he looked away again. However, _Eriol_ only loosened his grip to a more comfortable hold because he didn't have much desire to let go.

He mentally kicked himself. This was probably the most embarrassing thing that had happened to him. How could he have forgotten that he was holding her hand all this time? Why was he still holding her hand? And most importantly, why wasn't she letting go?

_Stupid, stupid hormones, messing up in the most awkward time._

In his peripheral vision, _Eriol_ could see the woman smile, and only then could he feel his own traitorous blush mounting to his pale face. _Tomoyo_ must have known how much torture this was for him and was probably enjoying it, of course, because she was sensitive in that sense. That fact was even more humiliating than anyone else knowing about what he was flustered about.

It was supposed to take them just a few minutes to reach their destination, but to _Eriol_ it was a longer march. Somehow he wanted to blame _Sakura_ for this confusion and her older brother and his assistant for arresting _Tomoyo_'s attention in the hallway.

_Or this performance together_, he ruefully added to himself. He would not have come up to her that way and flirt with the oblivious victim.

_I am a hopeless idiot on raging hormones_.

He really shouldn't be acting like a frustrated teenager on high, and he didn't even have any idea how one behaved.

_Eriol_ was fortunately saved from his condescending thoughts when the receiving room came into view.

His cousin had already entertained a guest upon their arrival to the entryway, one who _Tomoyo_ _Daidōji_ should effortlessly recognize. _Sakura_ had cleverly sent invitations to people who were close to the _Kinomoto_ family and who already knew _Tomoyo_, and the former wouldn't disclose the names to surprise her curious friend. But this had been actually the pianist's idea.

"Is that who I think he is?"

His Chinese best friend had his back on them, nonetheless it was impossible not to associate that unruly cinnamon mane to anyone but him.

"_Oniichan_," _Sakura_ said, delighted to see the approaching couple, and her guest turned to face them.

"You still look blue, _Li_. Was the trip enjoyable?"

It had recently become their game to taunt each other before the formal pleasantries were to take place. _Eriol_ couldn't help but smirk at the look on his friend's face upon the mention of his flight. He knew _Syaoran_ hated traveling by plane, and that heights always made him queasy. The Chinese would've gladly taken the train if he wasn't caught up with some imperative engagement in the last twenty-four hours.

"_Baka_. I heard that you got sick again. I'm rather disappointed that you're still alive." He easily fell to his bait and failed to acknowledge the ebony-haired woman at his side.

His cousin merely giggled despite the crude statement but _Tomoyo_ had looked scandalized, her fingers flexing significantly in his hand. The former heiress was not at all amused by his friend's twisted sarcasm, and there was something in the way she tensed that told him that she was suddenly distressed.

He consoled her by giving her hand a gentle squeeze but he wasn't sure if she understood his message.

"You remember _Syaoran_ _Li_, _Daidōji-san_, don't you?"

"_Konban wa_ _Li_-_san_," she greeted with a bow, and with this gesture she had to finally let go of his hold.

"_Daidōji-san_."

It was undeniable that _Syaoran_ was suddenly uptight for a stunned reaction. He had not expected the other guest to be the same girl he had mistakenly chased off before. With the whole misunderstanding of what he really had to do then it hadn't been his fault but he had nonetheless considered it a personal offense.

_Eriol_ didn't miss the guilt in the confused signals his best friend was letting off in his body language, but he still couldn't read what caused _Tomoyo_'s sudden tension.

"_Nee_...isn't it good to celebrate Christmas with friends?"

Either _Sakura_ was downright unaware or she was acutely attentive of the growing discomfort in everybody that made her say that. Her cousin guessed it was the latter because_ Kinomoto_ _Sakura_ was always perceptive. She didn't even have to sound forced when she started a conversation that involved presents, cats and photography just to get everyone talking again.

Even so, _Tomoyo_ had been a reluctant participant in the discussion, offering her opinion only when addressed. She was still mildly anxious and uncomfortable despite _Sakura_'s effort to bring everyone at ease, and _Syaoran_ couldn't look at her in the eye in his peculiar display of remorse.

"Would you like to practice in the piano room while we wait for the other guests?"

Maybe it would help her lighten up. Whatever she was thinking he wanted to know.

In the few times they practiced for the Christmas performance, he had noticed how singing seemed to lift her disposition.

His question surprised _Tomoyo_ but she was able to follow him after they had excused themselves.

He hadn't held her hand again nor stood too close, afraid that he may do something silly again.

It was a wordless promenade to the piano room and the former heiress fell behind as if on purpose, contemplating on something since she had welcomed _Syaoran_.

"He shouldn't have said that," she suddenly said, effectively stopping him in his tracks.

Before _Eriol_ could even open his mouth, _Tomoyo_ started speaking again.

"I'm sorry. _Li_-_san_ is your friend, but...I couldn't help myself."

That shocked and distressed look on her face shouldn't even be there to begin with, and he struggled to understand what she was trying to tell him. How could _Syaoran_'s statement aggravate her this way?

"_Daidōji-san_..."

"I know. I shouldn't have overreacted."

The pianist watched her in the soft radiance for a long minute, his objective ministrations replaced his curious interest this time.

There were a few emotions he could read in her face that moment but only one was clear. She had looked away too late, not wanting him to see that distinctive pout on her lips and those eyes that lost the spark they usually hold. She was physically like that when she worried.

_Aa...she is most definitely worried_, his thoughts pressed on.

He unconsciously stashed that expression of hers in the back of his mind.

He covered the gap her hesitation had caused, standing before her and fighting against any excuse to hold her. His shadow easily draped her frame and she looked even smaller in his eyes.

"_Daidōji-san_, look at me." It wasn't a command but there was an edginess in his plea that couldn't be denied, and _Tomoyo_ had flinched. But she hadn't stepped back, and he considered it an encouragement to continue speaking. "Are you still thinking about what _Li_ said?"

She wouldn't answer his question. When she finally lifted her face to him, he hadn't expected to see tears that formed in the corners of her wide eyes. She probably had whimpered or choked at his intense gaze, _Eriol_ couldn't really tell now. He was still debating if he should catch her tears before they rolled off her smooth cheeks.

She must have really been bothered.

He would probably never understand why she was surprisingly sympathetic.

"I am not going to die," he said these words in a firm and assuring tone at the same time as if he was trying to convince a child. He was now sure she had been truly shaken by a mere jest. The woman right in front of him appeared as if she would recoil any second and then curl up in a tight ball on the floor.

And he would never know why he needed to promise her again either, but _Eriol_ knew he had to be always careful with _Tomoyo_. It was as if she would break if he wasn't gentle enough.

Her amethyst eyes painstakingly scanned his sapphire orbs for any indication of a lie. She seemed torn between wanting to believe him and rejecting his vow.

"It's Christmas, _Daidōji-san_. You shouldn't even have these ideas."

His deep baritone dropped to a quieter note. He tried one more time to pacify her agitation with humor and a reassuring grin.

She replied with a slow nod but was quick to return a smile albeit it was an embarrassed one. He was leaning too close and he could glimpse another charming color materializing on her alabaster skin.

"I always forget. I guess Christmas is different for me this year because...I have friends now."

_Daidōji_ _Tomoyo_ must have really been a lonely girl.

"_Jaa_, if you promise me to smile the whole night, you'll get a treat from me."

"Are you bribing me, _Hiiragizawa-san_?" Those heliotrope irises flickered in amusement when she spoke.

"Maybe," the pianist teased as he spun away, his self-satisfied expression only peaked the young woman's interest.

"I'll remember that so don't look so arrogant. I'll be claiming my prize after the party."

Her mischievous nature was stimulating and much more appropriate for someone like her, and he was relieved that she had already overlooked what his idiotic best friend had said.

"The great _Tomoyo_ _Daidōji_ can be bribed then."

She playfully swatted his arm in response, and he couldn't help but laugh.

This year's Christmas was different for him, too, and _Eriol_ was rather relieved the former heiress didn't have to be alone or afraid anymore because she had his family with her now.

They had a few more hours before midnight, and the other guests, _Terada_ and his fiancée, _Rika_, _Yamazaki_ and his new girlfriend, _Chiharu_ had arrived together in prescribed outfits like the ones they were wearing. It was no other than _Sakura_ who would be solely responsible for this arrangement.

_Tomoyo_ hadn't stopped smiling since their talk. It didn't matter that she may have forgotten about his unlikely proposition or may have thought the treat he was talking about was seeing her friends again.

Something told him that something interesting was going to happen tonight.

* * *

Quick notes:

**baka - **stupid

**konban wa** - "Good evening."


	24. 24

**A/N: **I am...back? Hehe Sorry for the 2 months delay. School killed my mood, and I had to make sure everything has been taken care of before I start writing again. I lost my mojo, too, so imagine my frustration.

Thanks to **Property of Eriol **for always reviewing, and for all who read, reads, will read this fic.

* * *

Act 24, Winter

Seeing _Rika Sasaki _and _Chiharu Mihara_ again was probably the best Christmas present she had ever received from anyone, not that she received anything in the last fifteen years, and not that their arrival and this arrangement had ever been for her sake. Her friends had happened to be connected to _Eriol_'s superior and violinist friend anyway, and their attendance tonight was easily a coincidence.

For the past two hours she was beaming, untiring and much more cheerful than she probably was in the last few days. _Sakura _had voiced out her observation but she had merely smiled again and even allowed herself to laugh. She was being cryptic with her euphoria as if she should be because deep down she thought this feeling of elation made her somewhat uncomfortable and guilty, as if she didn't deserve to be this happy and as if she shouldn't be in the _Amamiya _house with these people who had quite startlingly accepted her rude presence in their lives.

_Tōya _lifted a crystal wine glass that glittered beautifully against the candlelight as he prepared for his speech. The others in that long table had fallen silent at his signal.

"_Minna-san, _our family had not initially intended this gathering to be a thanksgiving party for _Eriol-kun_'s recovery, but I guess we couldn't wait for New Year's day to come. Thank you for accepting the invitation and for coming to _Fukuoka _to celebrate with us."

"_Hai_. It's Christmas after all. This year is quite...different, and it's so inconsiderate of me to assume that you didn't have any other plans," _Sakura _added while she stared at the plate in front of her, seemingly speaking to the couples sitting side by side. There was a faint blush that was suddenly present on her face that was hard to miss especially when _Tomoyo _was right beside her.

"Don't worry about it, _Sakura-chan_. I like coming to _Fukuoka_," _Yamazaki _piped in with a smile to offer the awkward girl.

_Chiharu _merely nodded to _Eriol_'s direction and the latter returned her action with a nod of his own. The exchange looked like it was a secret trade but _Tomoyo _had somehow caught their gestures though she had not understood their implication.

"A toast to the sympathetic season," the doctor then declared ironically, almost smirking in effect. Then without warning he turned to _Eriol_. "May you be more mindful of your well-being now, cousin, and may you spare my poor heart from the emotional trauma."

His declaration wasn't meant to be something wounding, but his azure-eyed cousin had anyway sighed in response and tried his best not to look annoyed or bored. Either the annoyance or boredom was directed to himself or to _Tōya_, _Tomoyo _couldn't tell.

"To _Eriol-kun_ and his promising future," _Terada _added as he raised his own glass, and his fiancée did the same.

"The competition is next month, isn't it? _Ganbatte ne_."

_Rika_'s words roused the pianist from his stupor, but they didn't make him thrilled at all. The only color that was left of his pale face had now completely faded.

"The preliminary judging is not open to the public but we can watch the second part. _Hoe_! This makes me so excited. It's _oniichan_'s first competition after all."

His best friend didn't even have a sarcastic comment to say as he offered his encouragement along with the rest.

"Yes. _Arigatō. _I'll be doing my best." The pianist's response faltered a bit but only _Tomoyo _could hear that hesitation and only the former heiress could see how his jaw tensed and how those sapphire eyes fell.

_Hiiragizawa Eriol _didn't look as positive as he was supposed to be. He was _Clow Reed_'s son after all and everybody in that sophisticated dining room knew how capable he was of wining that competition, and nobody could even doubt, but in that moment of mirth nobody was aware of his existing discomfort or the underlying cause of it.

"_Hiiragizawa-san_..."

Sympathetic amethyst met guarded sapphire.

_Tomoyo _hadn't intended to break his concentration by saying his name but there was nothing left to do but give him an assurance that she was certain he'd anyway reject.

"It's going to be alright, _Hiiragizawa-san_."

She knew it was so overconfident of her to assume she could lift even just a little of that burden for him but it was also the least that she could do. The _senpai _was doing this to be noticed by his father, _Nakuru _had already told her. But there must be something else that he wanted to achieve, that acknowledgment for being his own person, an identity of his own, and this maddening pressure was suffocating him.

_It must have been so difficult for you. You're always compared to someone far greater, to your own father no less. But you really don't have to prove anything, Hiiragizawa-san. _

Her smile must have been contagious that even a fraction of that grim line on _Eriol_'s lips had relaxed and those beautiful sapphire eyes were warmer when they rested on her own amethyst orbs.

"Thank you, _Daidōji-san_."

_Why did it suddenly feel so terribly stifling?_

Her heart was frantically beating in her chest. She must have blushed shamelessly again and _Eriol _was surely going to see her expression if he was positioned right across her.

The former heiress could swear she had been visibly melting in embarrassment.

Luckily, _Yukito _had saved her from more embarrassing things to come, appearing in the room again with more of the gorgeous cuisine that his kitchen crew had prepared.

"This is absolutely beautiful, _Yukito-san," _her emerald-eyed friend swooned at the luscious food on the china platters. The colorful arrangement arrested everybody's attention including _Eriol_'s, and _Tomoyo _silently thanked the servant's genius once more.

* * *

The snow had settled attractively along the side of the estate where he could see the frozen lake, sparkling mysteriously in the night like crystalline dusts along pristine plains of white. _Eriol_ suspected that the mellow light of the moon had created the mesmerizing impression, and it seemed as if he was staring at an ashen sky instead of snowed fields.

"Waxing poetic in that imagination of yours again, _nee Hiiragizawa-kun_?"

The comment made him tear his gaze away from the window.

It was rather abnormal that the intruder of his reflection didn't start his statement with a bizarre lie about snow or winter. _Yamazaki _could be perceptive if he allowed himself to be, and even after three years, this fact still surprised the dark-haired pianist.

_Eriol _made sure he kept his face unreadable when he completely turned to the smiling man.

"I don't know what you are talking about, _Yamazaki-san_." It sounded oddly like a cheap denial even to his own ears.

"Of course, of course," the violinist indulged him without much of an argument or witty comeback, smiling wider in amusement. It was disturbing how _Yamazaki_'s eyes always disappeared when he did that, and it was much more unsettling that he didn't have anything to say.

While _Yamazaki _was tuning his violin for the duet, his girlfriend and _Tomoyo _were engaged in a rather active conversation. Then the latter had laughed suddenly which temporarily ceased the violinist's actions.

"She looks prettier when she's happy."

_Of course, she does_.

"Who does?" _Eriol _didn't even have to pretend that he didn't know who _Yamazaki _was talking about, but he was growing suddenly self-conscious knowing he had almost the same opinion about the oblivious woman.

_She's actually prettiest when she's happy, _his traitorous mind just had to add.

At the corner of his eye he could make out his colleague's amused expression that was etched on his countenance. For some reason, the violinist was able to read his thoughts.

"You act just like _Li-kun _right now," _Yamazaki _dared to tease the azure-eyed man as he busied himself with the last adjustments. "Is this why you chose to play Beethoven's Spring tonight, _Eriol-kun_? Is she the inspiration?"

"What are you—what do you mean I act like _Li?_"

"Ready, _Yamazaki-kun_?"

"I am, _Terada-sensei_," _Yamazaki _called back, ignoring the pianist's question and standing straight with his instrument on his shoulder and his bow ready. The audience had been prepared to listen to their performance for quite some time now. "Are you, _Hiiragizawa-kun_?"

Just because he arranged the meeting between _Tomoyo Daidōji _and her friends it didn't mean anything like that.

_Anything like what?_

_Eriol _nodded once as he settled on the piano tensely. He had caught the former heiress' lingering smile before he could stop himself, feeling more self-conscious than he had ever been in his life.

_I don't know_, he answered his own question.

He threw one signal to his partner's way before he flexed his long fingers instinctively, believing the warmth of spring had wrapped his entire being as the notes resonated in the room.


	25. 25

**A/N: **RUSHED COMPLETELY. The asthma attacks are annoying. Exactly one year from my bronchitis attack I get this. Boo. Anyway, I've tweaked chapter 23 and 24 a bit for consistency. Please check on the minor additions.

Thank you to **cheng**, **apple**, **lu **and** Property of Eriol** for always reviewing. :D ENJOY!

**Disclaimer: **Characters and song are not mine. :D

* * *

You light up the way for me in the darkness of night.

Oh, that warm look on your face...

- Yui Makino, _You Are My Love_

* * *

Act 25, Winter

_Yamazaki Takashi _was undoubtedly an excellent violinist, and he and _Eriol Hiiragizawa _were definitely the perfect pair for the piece. The two were playing Beethoven's violin sonata without so much care in the world and at the same time the music they were producing made the bitter season transform to subtlest spring.

An image was vividly captured that it was like seeing swaying and blooming dandelions in the snow.

_Chiharu _had told her before they started playing that _Yamazaki _had mentioned he would always ask _Eriol_ to be his accompanist in his exams. The reason that _Yamazaki _would do this was to charm the grading professors with _Eriol_'s own talent if not with his regal appearance, consequently forgetting the former's mistakes in the performance. However, _Tomoyo_'s friend suspected it to be a lie. Even she knew that the pianist had been _Yamazaki_'s good friend ever since high school and that they always performed together in chamber music presentations, recitals and otherwise.

Her amethyst eyes set themselves on her pale hands that were resting on her lap.

_Eriol _was almost painful to look at because he was so beautiful and so wonderful on that grand piano with his countenance fixed between pleasure and a hint of unconscious affection. He was simply warped into a world of his own again.

_Senpai must really belong there_, the former heiress thought as she noted the chords that dwindled with finality, the scenery of green meadows disappearing quietly on the last note.

She could imagine him playing on a stage, catching an audience in stark admiration, and that thought alone made her proud. _Tomoyo _lifted her hands to applaud.

"_Sugoi_," _Chiharu _gushed beside her, blushing in exhilaration. Her words insinuated her sheer appreciation of the performance. "I've heard _Takashi-kun _play a few times but I never realized he'd sound even better with _Hiiragizawa-kun_."

The violinist made his comical bow.

_Eriol _looked passive as usual but he almost would not look at _Yamazaki _in the eyes when his friend turned to grin at him.

_I can say the same thing for Hiiragizawa-san_, _Tomoyo _mused as she excused herself to stand by the piano this time. _He seems rather an intense musician but this delicate, cheerful character surprisingly suits him._

After a moment of delayed realization, her feet had frozen into place.

The dais beneath her _geta_ was an intimidating representation against her self-consciousness. She may had been a voice instructor and had sung in front of a crowd before but an experience like this would always be frightening. No matter the number, the feeling of a few people gaping at her like this was still too unbearable.

"_Daidōji-san_?" The pianist's questioning whisper cut through her musing. _Tomoyo _was almost leaning her side on the piano for support.

_Does Hiiragizawa Eriol ever feel nervous before any performance?_

"We'll be fine," he mouthed the words carefully.

Anxious amethyst met quiet sapphire.

It was ironic that he had to say such things to her now. He had been the doubtful one at dinner after all.

"_Sumimasen minna-san. _I have not been originally part of the programme. This is actually to make up for the recital that _Hiiragizawa-san _and I were supposed to do a few weeks ago," _Tomoyo _confessed with an embarrassed face and a bow to match. All the guest didn't particularly have much reaction and probably had already realized why this was the case. "However, it's still not a piano duet, and we had only a day for practice. But we will try our best to entertain everybody."

She gave _Eriol_ a nod before the pianist once more poised his fingers on the ebony and ivory keys in front of him, his back almost stiff in expectation.

_Eriol _had not intended to perform a song that he composed out of whim. The pianist was wary of her reaction, almost at the brink of self doubt, when he first played it that morning, and even argued that the lyrics may be too melancholic for their annual Christmas presentation. He didn't want to play it in any way.

But _Tomoyo _was more stubborn and trusted him with the music. The former heiress won in the argument by promising to perform it with him, hence, this current arrangement.

She just didn't expect that the spotlight would be on her, too.

The dark-haired young woman stilled her speeding heartbeat in a swift inhalation and pursed her suddenly parched lips.

If there had been any more trace of sun-drenched spring in the piano room, _Eriol_'s brooding notes completely changed the mood. He had improvised from their last practice but the amethyst-eyed woman had not minded the slight change at all.

_Tōya, _who was just casually standing by the velvet divan between a harassed-looking _Syaoran _and a flustered _Sakura_, had finally looked up in collected curiosity with another wine glass in his hand. He seemed much more interested of this duet than the first.

The doctor's assistant had a far-away look in her brown eyes as she gazed at her, spellbound by the anticipation in the music.

_Tomoyo _understood how there was no helping this anxiety as she determinedly fixed her already brittle concentration on the evergreen bristles of the Christmas wreath hanging behind the audience.

_ame ni nureta hoho wa namida no nioi ga shita_

_(The faint scent of tears on my rain-soaked cheeks...)_

_yasashii manazashi no tabibito_

_(The warm look on the face of travelers...)_

Notes floated by and eventually her gaze was not centered on the decoration that melted against the kaleidoscope of lights that bounced on the pale walls of the room. The face that these people could clearly see wouldn't betray her real feelings but the hand on the side of the piano was already trembling in restlessness. Even so, tingling tremors were quivering the tips of her fingers, traveling gradually to her arm then to her body thoroughly.

It was the most comforting caress.

_Hiiragizawa-san_...

Amethyst eyes widened in the stimulating sensations. It was strange how the feeble trembling could feel like butterflies fluttering in her hand.

_yume wa tobitatsu no chiisana tsubasa de_

_(But with these tiny wings launched by my dreams...)_

_omoi no kienai basho made_

_(over distant oceans and skies we'll soar...)_

_Is this how he really feels? _

The dejection and affection flickered alternately between the words and melody, making her focus on his music alone.

She had partly written some of the lines but the natural emotion of the piece was all the pianist's doing.

His piano had not sounded like this when they had rehearsed.

_futari de_

_(together...)_

_tooi umi wo sora wo koete_

_(to a place where memories never fade.)_

Her free hand slipped itself to her chest again when a dull pain wrapped around her previously racing heart.

_This longing is too overwhelming, _she said to herself, eyes glassy as she spun to look at the pianist's serene face.

_Eriol_ already had trained his cool sapphire orbs on her, waiting.

The piano throbbed in every sure press on the keys. Nothing else existed in the room but this dark-haired man and his song.

_So painful that I can't breathe_.

He smiled to her way, and that bittersweet look almost broke _Tomoyo_'s heart.

He was really so beautiful on the piano.

_aitai..._

_(I miss you...)_

* * *

**A/N: **The song is taken from Tsubasa Reservior Chronicle. It's the one that Sakura sang in the cafe. nyahahahahahahaha I'm so out of creative juice right now. TAT

* * *

Quick notes:

**geta **- Japanese wooden sandals


	26. 26

**A/N: **This update is really unexpected, and, sadly, rushed. Suddenly I had this vision of finishing a short chapter today, and then _voila!_, here it is. LOL I am NOT making any sense. I'm so scared of inconsistencies. Help me.

Thanks to **cheng **and **Property of Eriol **for the untiring support, and to the others who have reviewed previously.

* * *

Act 26, Winter

_"And now for more news: Amidst global recession and unpleasant speculations about the bankruptcy of Daidōji Kabushiki-gaisha in the past few weeks, there is happy news from the company's CEO, Sonomi Daidōji. Daidōji-sama had formally and publicly announced in a Christmas charity ball in Tokyo last night the engagement of her only daughter, Tomoyo Daidōji, to Aozora Ginkō_'s _heir_, _Ichigo Nanami, who has started managing the mergers and acquisition department of the multi-billion financial company earlier this year_. _There was already a talk about the possible purchase of the Daidōji Kabushiki-gaisha by the formidable Aozora Group but the information remains to be in the list of speculations and this is yet to be confirmed by either party." _

* * *

Raven strands slid smoothly back into place as sapphire eyes narrowed seriously into ominous slits.

Despite the plunging temperature in his room he had unbuttoned his shirt too dangerously low in suppressed frustration and annoyance, exposing a great deal of smooth alabaster flesh. He might have not even noticed his actions as it was harder to think in such dire circumstance.

Never mind the cold. He had to clear his head fast and he needed to be calm about this. There was no point in aggravating over things that were beyond any help.

_Is there anything you can do? _His mind retorted sardonically. It was what his best friend had asked him just a minute ago, too, and just then he could feel a headache coming.

His cell phone felt too warm against his ear.

_Syaoran _was still waiting in the other end of the line, knowing exactly that it was best to leave _Eriol _pondering on this news. He hadn't meant to say his question out loud but even he didn't know what to make out of the situation. _Daidōji Tomoyo _had probably more secrets than she would ever let on, dragging his stubborn friend to the pits along with her. The dark-haired pianist may have not realized this yet but he alone could envision it happening anytime soon.

_Eriol _sighed, drowning himself to the reminiscence of an image of her in that striking dark _kimono _in his mind. Those questioning amethyst orbs looked straight at his, confused for some reason but still strangely content. She smiled even more brilliantly as their song ended, her haunting, cool voice still echoing in his head hours later. She had not been chosen as a voice instructor by _Terada _for nothing after all.

He raised a cold hand to his eyes and released a heavy sigh.

_She was truly happy last night_.

Now the spell was broken and the former heiress had gone to work after lunch the next day, persistent of the fact that she could not abandon the local library at this time. The manager was preparing for the annual cleaning and she insisted to help the old superior because no other employee could. _Tomoyo _left the mansion in her strange clothes and gray contacts again, blissfully ignorant of her _senpai_'s plight.

"If the _Aozora _Group were really to acquire _Daidōji _Corporation, what does that leave _Sonomi Daidōji_?" _Eriol _asked the other man. It seemed more of an afterthought than a real query but the Chinese replied just the same. His friend must know the answer to this as well.

"Nothing." His tone was as grave as the weather that late afternoon. The snow was suddenly heavy, blurring the happy memory they made last night.

Sapphire eyes aimed their stare on the fluffy Mozart doll sitting on the mahogany study table.

"I have a favor to ask of you, _Li_," _Eriol _whispered in a pitch even and unchanging as he laid a finger on Mozart's silver synthetic mane. One embarrassed amethyst-eyed woman had given him the doll as a present, sorry for her lack of creative sense. There was nothing wrong with the sewn details of its miniature clothes nor the measurements. Its child-like appearance was even amazingly soft and adorable.

"Anything, _Hiiragizawa_."

It was a shame that he hadn't even got anything for her. He couldn't even admit to himself that she was whom he had been thinking about while he performed that duet with _Yamazaki_.

"Would you find out if the bankruptcy is real and if there is going to be an acquisition soon?"

This reserved poise he was maintaining was so fake. He could be very pretentious if he wanted himself to be.

"_Oi. _You only need to say the magic word." A cryptic message could be heard between his friend's seemingly friendly words.

_What do you intend to do now, Hiiragizawa?_

With _Syaoran_'s connections in the Japanese stock market, obtaining this information firsthand would not be impossible. However, there was still much to be discovered in this mess. Things were going to be very troublesome by then. He would rather be prepared.

"_Onegaishimasu_."

_Eriol _didn't even have to elaborate.

"_Heki heki_," the Chinese indulged nonchalantly, choosing not to spout a snide remark this time. But he would have rolled his amber eyes if he were only standing in front of his friend.

The dark-haired pianist leaned the back of his head against the edge of the upholstered sofa, headache neither dissipating nor developing. His brain just stopped functioning altogether.

"_Arigatō_."

A short second passed between the two unlikely friends, one that was rather uncomfortable because of either person's dread.

"_Hiiragizawa_—"

"I know. I'm stressing over these things again when I shouldn't be. It's not my business, right?" He felt surprisingly irritated and frustrated again. _Syaoran _was not even his enemy but he was suddenly rude at him and he was even the one asking him a favor.

_What is the matter with me?_

"I'm sorry, _Li_."

"_Aa_." _Syaoran _thankfully didn't take any offense.

"But she is going to run away because that is her nature, and who knows where I'll find her again." This silent desperation laced in his voice was pitiful in his own ears. He was becoming uncharacteristically uptight again.

The Mozart doll was mocking him with those beady, blue eyes and that cheeky smile on its downy face. There was modest blush on its cheeks, a resemblance that quite mirrored its maker's own beautiful flush.

_Why am I even thinking these things?_

"She will not run away again, _Hiiragizawa_, because you will not allow her to."

This was the reason why he was friends with _Li Syaoran_. The Chinese knew of his stubbornness and understood without him having to explain anything.

"_Aa_..."

* * *

**A/N: **I couldn't help but use an unknown name. I can't remember anymore CCS character that I haven't used yet. huhu But I can't stop myself from almost stripping Eriol naked. RAWR.

* * *

Quick notes:

**kabushiki-gaisha - **corporation

**aozora - **blue sky

**ginkō - **bank

**onegaishimasu - **"Please." in most polite form.

**heki - **"Ok."


	27. 27

**A/N: **Please don't ask me why this is a really short chapter. I am depressed of the outcome because I feel that I have dragged the situation for too long. huhu But I promise that the next few chapters will be interesting.

**Thank you** to **uvr-B1u5H'd**, **cheng**,** lu **and** Property of Eriol **for reviewing and encouraging me. I would not know what to do without you. Like, seriously.

* * *

Act 27, Winter

_So Okaasama had started to make a move, _the former heiress thought sullenly after having read yesterday's newspaper.

It was relatively bold of _Sonomi Daidōji _to make a public announcement two days ago while her daughter had not even been under her care for months now. The calculating matriarch was either pressured to do so or she had another plan in mind to lure _Tomoyo _out of her hiding. The former heiress decided that it must be both. _Sonomi _had told her the straightforward truth about the real condition of _Daidōji _Corporation then. The company was indeed heading to a dismal collapse, and to achieve the mutual venture, her mother was selling her to a mogul's son, who had an unpleasant reputation of abusing his spouse. She would be the third wife if she were to be wed to _Nanami Ichigo_.

_Tomoyo _sank behind the receiving desk, shaking in fear and shrinking emotionally at the memory of violence in her own family. She was remorseful she couldn't give up her freedom for the company that her own father had built but the countless bruises and invective that she received from her mother every time she was displeased of her drove her to want a life where she was acknowledge as a person and not as a mere tool for business. She never had much confidence in herself then. It seemed that _Sonomi _made sure she stayed insecure.

"What are you doing there, _Aya-san_?" Her superior called out behind her, startling her.

The dark-haired library assistant straightened up before fixing another practiced smile to the manager.

"I was looking for my pen," she lied without so much difficulty.

_What am I going to do now? _

"It's right beside the newspaper," the old man pointed out helpfully.

The pen was tragically sitting beside the picture of one grinning _Daidōji Sonomi_.

_

* * *

Tomoyo _hadn't shown any apparent indication of knowing her mother's suspicious statement so the bespectacled young man elected to observe her disposition in the next few days.

The girl still smiled and acted naturally herself but she seemed somewhat strained than before.

_She must know about the news_, _Eriol _thought critically. _Why is she keeping it all to herself?_

Her frantic attempt to disguise her appearance four days after the news was unusual even for _Yukito, _who commented that even in the _Amamiya _house _Tomoyo _had been wearing her contacts and strange clothes. After the New Year's day had passed, _Tomoyo _still kept the habit and had grown more withdrawn, choosing to interact only when required.

_Eriol _kept on watching her when he could, and on the times when he couldn't see her, he inquired _Syaoran _of the development of the _Aozora _Group's acquisition of the textile company. It was bad enough that the bankruptcy wasn't a mere gossip. His Chinese friend probably believed he had become too obsessed with _Tomoyo_'s situation.

_Is the competition driving me mad to the point of having this unlikely displacement? _

He really should focus on practicing for the preliminaries but it was difficult to concentrate on the task as of late.

The cup of Earl Grey was unfortunately abandoned again, and the Ravel piece he had been rehearsing for a month was getting old.

He hoped both of them survived the week.


	28. 28

**A/N: **Hahahahahahaha This is surprisingly longer, don't you agree? Hihi Thank you to **Property of Eriol**, **uvr-B1u5H'd** and **Fon-chan** for the reviews. They inspired me to make a swift(?) update. Really. So thank you, thank you, thank you to those who still support this fic.

* * *

Act 28, Winter

It had been more than a week since the news about her supposed engagement was announced in national television and newspapers. As the days progress her apprehension could only grow, mounting to the brim of her self-control. No amount of distraction could make her forget of the situation. Thankfully, no one in the _Amamiya _mansion had said anything about hearing any news, not even _Eriol _who had an uncanny sense at times.

_Run. Run far away from here before you bring everyone down with you, _her rational mind ordered, and the idea had become too appealing in the past few days.

She secured a scarf around her neck, neatly covering the lower part of her face before pushing herself out of the library. The chill hadn't improved but the darkness had long since shrouded the whole town. Without the dancing merry lights the town plaza and the buildings simply looked lifeless again.

_Is running away the only option I have?_

The former heiress rubbed her eyes carefully. These grey contacts were becoming too dry because of the cold.

_Is it right to keep on doing this?_

In the past year, she had wondered if changing her destiny was worth it. When they visited a local shrine on New Year's day, the former heiress prayed for her freedom. _Sonomi _had created this illusory independence, making sure she completely understood that living out of the _Daidōji_ household really meant suffering and regret. _Tomoyo _realized later that she was still being played. The only advantage that she had right now was the fact that her mother couldn't find her as of the moment.

"A penny for your thoughts."

She snapped out of her daydream with a startled look in her eyes. That familiar lean figure was quite a sight in the dimness.

"_Hiiragizawa-san_," she mumbled in recognition before she bowed to the man who broke her stupor. There was a questioning tilt in her voice as she said his name.

"_Konban wa_," _Eriol_ greeted, bowing back. He was casually leaning against the metal side bars that lined the street, arms folded to his chest. Even though he had a trench coat and a warm scarf snuggled to his body, it was known to the former heiress that it wasn't safe for him to be out in the cold for too long.

"What are you doing here?" The _kohai _couldn't help but ask. The _senpai _was supposed to be home, rehearsing for the preliminaries the next day, but he was anyway leisurely lounging in that side of the road.

Haze came out when the dark-haired pianist exhaled.

"I was in the area." After carefully considering the reply, he explained vaguely with that piercing stare of his. _Eriol _had not worn his glasses because the mist was just going to fog them.

There weren't a lot of people out at this time of the night, and the temperature had indeed dropped a few more degrees.

She held that gaze for a few seconds before readjusting her scarf. A distraction would be good in a time like this, and she didn't know why it was suddenly awkward between them.

"And I wanted to see you, _Aya-san_," the _senpai _added in a noncommittal manner without moving from his spot, distinctly using her false name even when they were alone in the sidewalk.

It had been a while that anybody ever said that without the implication of threat. The last time had been from her mother's guards and she ended up having that bruise on the face. She inwardly cringed at the hundred possibilities of what her mother would do when she got hold of her again. _Sonomi _would probably beat her up first then lock her up in a closet if she was still conscious just like how she always did before.

Her boots made an ugly crunching sound as she stepped forward, the noise masking the erratic beating of her heart. This agitation was harder to control.

"_Sō desu ne_."

Straightening up his stance, the dark-haired man stood taller. Despite being unwell recently, he hadn't looked like his lanky self like she had first met him. He was much sturdier in a different way, too. There existed a particular air about him that couldn't be overlooked but she couldn't anyway pinpoint.

"Are you alright?" His concerned tone almost made her consider. The former heiress couldn't make up her mind about what to do, and she was sorely tempted to reveal her situation to the only person whom she knew would understand. However, her consideration still won out, and _Tomoyo _couldn't burden _Eriol _at this time most especially when he had his first competition to concentrate on, ultimately leaving him in the dark about the circumstances.

"Of course."

The smile that agonizingly stretched her face was seriously fake but this man would not be able to tell with the scarf that hid her lips.

The pianist stared at her again, the same way he had studied her face just a few minutes ago with those azure eyes deeply fixed at her dull grey orbs.

It was like déjà vu of that one autumn night in her dorm room, a slow and sad repeat of the past. And if _Eriol _were to let go of it right then, she would shut herself again from the world.

A stray strand of black hair thrashed along with the gust of cold wind, an inevitability like this numbing conversation.

_Ask me again. Please._

She surprised herself with this repulsive desperation but she could only look away with a horrified blush on her porcelain face that was fortunately hard to make out in the shadows.

Much to her dismay, _Eriol _hadn't asked again but he had swiftly moved closer and laid a gentle hand on her head. It was a strange comfort that he was offering to her, as if he knew that she needed him. This behavior was confusedly different from the first time she saw him that night.

"Let's go home, _Daidōji-san_," he whispered as he leaned over to her level. "_Mozart_-_kun_ is going to worry if his _Tomoyo-chan _have been out in the cold for too long."

Their faces were too close that she could feel his warm breath, this proximity making her extremely conscious of herself.

She blinked rapidly. Was the action caused by this intimacy or his last statement, she couldn't tell.

"_Mozart-kun_?" Her confusion was priceless.

"_Un._ I named the doll you made _Mozart-kun_," he answered with an amusing nod, trying his best to look serious despite the smile that he was hopelessly fighting to hide. He was his playful self again, the suspecting aura melting effortlessly like snowflakes on her hand. This sapphire-eyed pianist had his way of cheering her up. It was funny that she could only be truly distracted this way.

Her blush was probably more evident now that _Eriol _had chosen to stand this close. The way he mentioned her name was just as flattering. Before she could stop herself from the embarrassment, the warmth on her face had spread remarkably throughout her body.

_Maybe there is still hope._

"Let's go home, _Hiiragizawa-san_."

It was the first time she ever felt good in days.


	29. 29

**A/N: **Ummm...yeah, I'd like to say sorry for this short and slow-boil update. My English Literature teacher in High School died this morning and affected my writing.

Thanks to **lu**,** cheng**,** uvr-B1u5H'd**, **SnowyReverie** and **Property Of Eriol **for believing in me and for bothering to review. And, yeah, I can't help but use "Mozart-kun" for the doll's name. I'm lacking creativity like that. LOL

* * *

Act 29, Winter

The preliminaries had his blood jumping in his nerves.

The alert judges sitting in the bleachers in the dark, the polished stage and the glaring spotlight, the handsome black Steinway, and the oppression of the dark suit he was wearing that afternoon weren't something he hadn't experienced before. In the contrary, he had done countless recitals and concerts, but these were performances that he didn't think were enough to make _Clow Reed_ pay attention to because none of them were really his own. He was yet to debut if he would make it out first place of this contest.

_Terada Yoshiyuki, _who had flown to _Fukuoka _for his last few rehearsals and for this competition, had congratulated him in his waiting room, assuring him that he had remarkable interpretations of Mendelssohn's prelude and one of Ravel's most complicated pieces.

In this anxious state, he couldn't feel his fingers the moment he had pressed the last key.

"You really did your best, didn't you? You should be proud of yourself," his mentor said as he tapped the pianist's tense back.

He couldn't even feel that hand that was supposed to encourage him.

_But is this best enough?_

The pianist tried to return the man's pleased grin but he only got as far as a curt nod. This anticipation over the results had induced the bile to his throat and it was so much difficult to speak.

For the next five minutes, he would be holding his breath. The participants who should proceed to the finals had not been announced yet, and that was more important to him because advancing meant a step closer to his goal. This competition should determine his confidence in his skill. He was always regarded a prodigy but he never had enough determination to get into another competition after he had failed his father when he participated in a concourse in England years ago. And right that instant, when he was resisting the infuriating urge to recoil in too much stressful expectation, it was especially harder to draw out any strength from anything.

_Eriol _closed his eyes, trying to divert his negative thoughts to something more comforting.

A presenter had started calling the finalists who would be competing the next day in random while the judges remained in the dark.

_"__Is it alright if I go watch your final performance, Hiiragizawa-san?"_

"Number eight."

_Tomoyo_'s question just had to pop in his mind like a welcomed interruption.

"Number five."

This was a displacement of feelings he easily succumbed to. There was a slight blush on her cheeks when she had asked, but it was probably because of the cold. The temperature was dropping in a crippling degree then.

_"__Are you sure?"_ His surprise to her request had him saying his afterthought out loud.

"Number six."

He didn't mean to sound so confused but he knew he was anyway. Why was it a wonder to him that _Tomoyo _would want to see his performance?

"Number two."

The former heiress had also looked utterly stunned, as if she had just realized that she was asking her _senpai_ a foolish question. However, she had nodded upon recovery, and he had felt a surge of warmth that filled his chest.

"Number two?"

He still felt oddly warm just thinking that she trusted him enough to get to the finals.

"_Eriol-kun_?"

A hand reached for his shoulder, shaking him to return to consciousness.

The lights flickered and his gaze returned its focus. _Terada _had a strange look on his face when he stared at him. The other contestants in the backstage were probably guessing he was pathetically breaking under this strain.

_Where am I?_

"Number two, _Eriol-kun_. They are calling you. You need to get up to the stage."

His hands shook and a new sense of respite spread over him like wild fire.

"I...made it." His voice had a skeptical note but that satisfied grin on his handsome face was slowly turning into a relieved laughter. He couldn't be bothered about other people's opinion because he was too happy to care.

He would have to personally tell the amethyst-eyed woman that she could definitely watch him play on that stage tomorrow.

* * *

**A/N: **I personally think this chapter is not needed for plot development. LOL


	30. 30

**A/N: **I had a stressful weekend. I had to participate in a gruesome training, and there is no guarantee that I get accepted to teach children. Boo.

Thank you for all who read, and for **uvr-B1u5H'd** and **cheng **for reviewing. They keep me going, really.

* * *

Act 30, Winter

_Tomoyo_ flexed her fingers to ease the uncomfortable feeling for the fourth time since she started rearranging the book in the reference section. The white working gloves she was wearing that day was particularly clammy apart from the fact that it barely protected her hands from the usual cold in that part of the library.

"It's time for my break now, _Aya-senpai_," her companion, the library assistant hired last week, told her just after the clock struck six o'clock. "I'll be back to help you, _ne_."

"_Daijōbu desu_. I can finish this myself in a few minutes. You enjoy that break," she said with a small smile. This new girl had been working hard the whole afternoon, carting heavy tomes of various sizes to their respective places and meticulously organizing them according to topics and call numbers. She definitely deserved the breather.

Despite her reassurance, the assistant suddenly seemed uncertain to allow her do all the work.

"_Jaa_ _ne._" The former heiress didn't mean to dismiss the poor girl like that but the _kohai _wouldn't leave if she didn't.

The assistant's light footfalls anyway echoed in that area ominously as she left, upsetting the quiet library with the unflattering noise. Nobody else was in the library now besides the young woman.

_Tomoyo _kept herself busy that she may forget about the unusual discomfort in her gloves, carefully threading her gaze through the call numbers that might have been mistakenly ordered.

_I wonder if Hiiragizawa-san made it to the finals_.

_Eriol_ left with _Terada _so early that she wasn't able to say good luck.

_He doesn't need luck. Hiiragizawa-san is a prodigy, _her mind reminded her.

Of course the bespectacled pianist was a prodigy, how could she forget that?

She rounded the other side of the room with her back against the entryway a few minutes later, eyes easily falling on the row of books again in inspection, absorbed with her task until she heard footsteps reverberating against the walls and the sound traveling to the high ceiling again.

"You're back too soon. Did you forget something?" She called out without tearing her gaze from the archives. But there hadn't been any answer like she expected and the thud of the footsteps faded as soon as her question was uttered.

"_Eh_?_"_

_An intruder? _

A gloved hand froze just as it could touch a leather bound book. There was a figure standing behind her, a sinister shadow falling on her form as the source of illumination was being masked offensively.

_Okaasama_.

Her breath was caught in her throat but she couldn't make anymore movement. The former heiress expected one of _Sonomi Daidōji_'s guards to wrench her away from the shelves and drag her out of the library. In a quick stride the intruder covered the short distance between them and lurched forward without allowing her to even think anymore. Yet instead of arms hauling her body to the exit, these strong and sturdy limbs enclosed all of her in a firm embrace.

She gasped one more time, scared of the possibility that a pervert had found her alone in the library instead. What could she do against one?

There was even no time to scream.

"I couldn't believe it." That baritone promptly melted her terror like a lump of snow under a blistering desert sun. It was funny how her face flitted from one horrified expression to a stunned look in milliseconds.

"I still can't believe I made it," the man murmured laughingly against her ear when he bent his head closer. His tone suggested how he was more relieved than he was happy but she was too caught up with her own emotions to pay attention to his. Who could think straight when a man was pressed too close to your back like that?

"_Hiiragizawa-san_." She sounded as if she was making sure that it was him holding her that moment. The _kohai_ didn't know what else to do.

"Thank you, _Daidōji-san_," he said in a quiet voice. He still hadn't moved, his arms still wrapped around her. _Eriol_ was rather comfortable of this unlikely position.

It was a wonder how _Tomoyo_ could still stand while all feeling had left her limbs. Her arms remained slack on her sides and refused to budge, and this poor heart was beating too wildly for a different reason altogether._ Eriol Hiiragizawa _might be oblivious of the effect of his actions to the former heiress, but _Tomoyo _couldn't disregard the burning sensation on her face.

_What am I going to say?_

Before she could answer her own question, the bespectacled pianist had abruptly let go of her, leaving her more confused than before.

"For what?" She said a little unsteadily, trying to appear unfazed despite the blush that she couldn't stop from completely painting her face. Thankfully, she didn't have to turn to him right away, giving herself some time to school her expression to something more neutral. All she could manage was a slight pout.

_Be still, you foolish heart. A cardiac arrest would be too unbecoming at a time like this. _

"I...didn't have much confidence even when I decided to participate in this competition. I am usually pressured, constantly burdened by my lineage," _Eriol _replied after a long minute, almost whispering as if he couldn't let anyone hear this confession because he was embarrassed to admit it.

When _Tomoyo_ had enough nerve to finally train her gaze on his eclipsed face, the pianist had a peaceful look in his deep blue eyes.

"At Christmas, you said: it will be alright," the _senpai _told her, breaking eye contact as he wistfully ran a finger on the labels of the hardbound texts that the young woman had already neglected. The pianist was now standing beside her but was still maintaining a safer distance between them. "It was actually the only time I allowed myself to listen to anyone because I have become so used to people expecting too much from me that what I feel didn't have to matter anymore. Maybe I have been secretly insecure for too long."

She stared at his profile, humbled by his unexpected admission.

"I didn't have any friends until I met your family, and now I believe that I already know what friendship means."

The bespectacled young man with the most sensitive azure eyes regarded her wordlessly, quietly urging her to continue speaking.

"A friend eases the burden that has become too heavy to carry on your own," the former heiress went on. "We are friends, aren't we, _Hiiragizawa-san_?"

A slow, beguiling smile grew on _Eriol_'s handsome features.

"I suppose we are."

It was the first instance that they ever acknowledge that fact and it was somewhat liberating, and _Tomoyo _supposed that any sign of affection from the dark-haired pianist could be simply tagged as fondness.

_Baka. He cannot do whatever he likes with you while you swoon at everything he does, _her cynical mind sneered, pointing out the incident minutes ago. That intimate embrace was certainly still uncalled for.

Before the young woman could give a mental comeback, the new library employee had made her way back to the reference division, huffing despite her short respite. It would not be until _Eriol _bid his farewell that she would realize _Tomoyo _had company.

"Was that your boyfriend, _Aya-senpai_?" The girl had shamelessly gaped until she could not see the pianist's back anymore. It was an innocent question, but the _Daidōji _heiress' mind was sadly malicious.

"No. _Hiiragizawa-san _is just a friend," she differed, casually relocating her attention to her abandoned task even though she wasn't really seeing anything in front of her that moment.

"What a really handsome man. _Nee Aya-senpai..._"

Her foolish heart was a traitor as well.


	31. 31

**A/B: **I am BACK! . . .not really. I had this chapter written a long time ago but I just never had the nerve to post because I feel that it had dragged too much. I also have a job now, thank you, and that is actually the reason why I am putting a temporary stop to all other activities including writing. But please be assured that even when I'm teaching Koreans some decent English I have this fanfic in my mind.

Thank you to **0jaz0**, **ChristabelSB**, **James Birdsong**, and **cheng** for reviewing. And I appreciate all those who still read and support this fanfic. Enjoy! :)

* * *

Act 31, Winter

_Tomoyo _felt so incredibly soft and warm when he hugged her from behind, and he yielded to the temptation of pulling her closer to his chest that night and drowning himself senseless to the unlikely rapture.

The jarring sound of the door scraping against the tiled floor pulled him abruptly back to reality that his mind reeled severely, leaving him disoriented about where he was and who was creating the noise.

_Eriol _looked up and found himself alone in the room. The next contestant had been called to perform on stage, and that person was the one who caused the cacophony and interrupted his daydream.

_Kuso, _he cursed in his head, realizing twelve hours too late how ridiculous it was to jump on _Tomoyo_ like that even when he was experiencing the adrenaline rush, the euphoria of having qualified for the finals of his first piano competition. It was pointless, and it was insensitive and again out of character of him to lose composure. The girl was definitely going to think he was a pervert, and this careless and impulsive action of his would cost her audience today.

He groaned to his reflection in the mirror.

This was not the right time to get sidetracked because his turn in the competition was going to be up in less than an hour and he needed to be mentally prepared instead of regretting over what he had done last night.

Thankfully, he couldn't see her face when it happened, or he would have seen a face of disgust and horror and he would have felt disappointed of her reaction. Then again the raven-haired young woman would not openly show her feelings but she must have been appalled by his actions.

_What am I talking about? I never cared much about these things before. Why start now?_

These were questions that he asked himself over and over again.

The pianist ran a pale hand down his face, willing the thoughts to go away and failing anyway.

_Syaoran_'s somber face in one of their recent conversations drifted to his mind, at the exact moment where his friend was telling him something about his needless involvement with one _Daidōji _heiress, and _Eriol _cursed again, vocally this time that he surprised himself of his own annoyed voice that sounded hollow against the four walls of the waiting room.

He would deal with _Tomoyo'_s predicament later and decide on the best course of action about her quandary. Right now he needed to face the music he had been eluding from since he was a child.

It was just about time.

_

* * *

Tomoyo _squirmed beside _Nakuru, _who was oblivious of the girl's restiveness since the start of the finals. Her usual cover up of plain clothes one size bigger than her frame and cool, gray contacts should be enough consolation but there was no helping her anxiety in spite of this and the temporary comfort of the darkness in the auditorium.

There hadn't been any more reports about the _Daidoji _Corporation or _Aozora _Group on television or newspapers, nevertheless it was still somewhat unsettling as if she was tautly waiting for a time bomb to blow off anytime soon.

A steady sound redirected her focus. A low murmur could be heard among the spectators as the third contestant clumsily left the stage. Even the audience could pass an initial judgement over the final performances. There was excitement among the guests and it was somehow contributing to the electric anticipation in the contest that afternoon as restless relatives, friends and mentors alike had come to show their steadfast support for the finalists.

"_Li-kun _said he'd be here but I don't see him anywhere," the nurse said, searching among the audience. The amber-eyed Chinese didn't sit with them when the contest started, and with the limited light it was impossible to see everybody's faces. "Do you think he might have canceled at the last minute, _Tōya_?"

_Sakura _wasn't able to make it despite her promise to see her cousin perform in the last round because of an unexpected photo shoot in _Tokyo_, but _Syaoran _had surprisingly pledged his attendance regardless of his seemingly hectic schedule.

"I am certain the _gaki _is here but I will not even bother knowing where he really is right now," _Tōya Kinomoto_ mumbled to himself, rather thinking aloud. The young doctor pinched the bridge of his nose again and melted against his chair, still groggy from having to work a double shift that ended just a few hours ago. Nonetheless, he insisted that he should not miss his cousin's performance, saying that moral support was the least he could give to _Eriol_. As a childhood friend, _Nakuru _had even done the same.

_Moral support. Yes, that is what I am here for, even if I know I am just risking my safety._

There was a five minute interval in every performance, and _Eriol_'s turn was next. The former heiress sat stiffly on her seat and then shifted again, unable to stay still in heavy expectation. It was either this moment or the one they both shared last night that attributed to this renewed restless energy. But she liked to convince herself that the latter was the more plausible cause.

_What good reason do you have for encouraging awkward thoughts about last night?_

She still had to convince herself that what ever happened between them did not have to matter. Reading too much into things would not be very wise.

Her hands seemed to have suddenly recalled the clammy feeling under the uncomfortable linen gloves they wore the previous night and had now started to react the same way even without the gloves on as the familiar figure of the azure-eyed young man appeared on the almost bare stage.

She was praying a silent prayer just when the pianist planted his fingers on the ivory and ebony panels. Her action was not caused by her inability to believe in the dark-haired man, but by her wish to stop her heart from drumming against her chest too fast at this vision before her.

Then suddenly_ Eriol_'s music started to fill the whole auditorium, carefully building up like a looming march of a doleful harmony. The piece he chose to play was altogether an exceptional and poignant interpretation of Beethoven that unanimously detained the audience's interest. It was a miserable and liberating melody at the same time that had now swelled in a feverish rage.

_Tomoyo _blinked as if she had just seen _Eriol _for the first time. His hair looked darker in the spotlight and his skin shone in contrast to his tuxedo. Long fingers weaved themselves expertly on the keys in front of him. He was such a sight to behold, an ethereal portrait of a pianist both in agony and in pleasure.

The pianist came to a sudden fermata that she, along with the rest of the spectators, had to hold her breath. The suspension was necessary for the next measure, and just as he successfully punctuated his music, he began with a rich tone that astounded everyone again, dropping the old facade of his music to reveal its true intention. _Tōya_ had completely woken up from his stupor and had gaped, never expecting that his cousin could even surpass himself.

The soaring array of emotions completely surrounded her, tugging at her heart painfully as she remembered how the pianist enclosed his arms around her and stole her strength away. Her vision blurred just as the inevitable final bar of the cantabile made itself known. She wanted to believe this suffocating ache of seeing him there on the gleaming stage was instigated by her overwhelming respect for the pianist and not by anything more selfish like—

_Love? _

A tear rolled off her alabaster cheek before it soundlessly fell on her joined hands.

_Can you afford it, Tomoyo? _

Of course, she couldn't. Until she stopped pretending to be somebody else, until she acknowledged her fate, and until she ceased depending on this man she could never allow herself to burden anyone with such meaningless sentiments. She would be contented with her objective pride for _Eriol, _and she wouldn't ever complain.

* * *

Quick notes:

**kuso **- (curse word)


	32. 32

**A/N: **Ohmigawd. I know this is way, way overdue, but I am just glad that I am back. Really sorry for the long wait, and sorry that it isn't really enough. Thank you so much for waiting.

* * *

Act 32, Winter

Perhaps he overestimated himself. Vexation displaced what used to be a euphoric sensation swimming in his head. The pumping adrenaline in his blood was gone, sucked dry by a sinister black void. The feeling of being yanked downwards from the summit of gratification to the lows of disenchantment was making his head excruciatingly throb.

Displays of laudatory flowers had decorated the area, loud and overbearing that it further hurt the senses.

_I can't believe this_, he lamented to himself, paling at the sight of one particular woman, who was quietly watching him with curious ruby eyes. Fours years had passed, and his bitter feelings still hadn't changed and had only been intensely fueled by her unexpected appearance. Despite his frustration he was able to pull an even and unruffled countenance when he was met with a round of congratulations.

His mentor, _Yoshiyuki Terada, _was blissfully oblivious after the routine introduction of the four judges, trading pleasantries and initiating a predictable conversation with them. It had been a unanimous vote, and the instructor was immensely pleased by _Eriol_'s victory in the competition, not even noticing that in spite of the supposed festive mood in the backstage the bespectacled pianist didn't share his enthusiasm to celebrate.

_Eriol _offered a tight smile to the jury who had come to personally meet him. The oldest among them was quick to suggest that the young victor participate in the _Hamamatsu_ International Piano Competition where even more competent opponents from all over _Japan_ chose to join.

"It's an even better avenue to be recognized in that contest. Getting in the finals would be a feat, I tell you, young man. So many piano geniuses. Nevertheless, it shouldn't be a problem with you because you are _Clow Reed_'s son, aren't you?"

The old man's laughter rang raucously in his head, the noise pounding mercilessly in his ears. _Eriol_ was the least amused by the turn of events, and _Terada _was finally catching up with his temper. The judge's most recent statement was rhetorical, and wasn't meant to be offensive, nevertheless it was the last stake to his already battered self-esteem. He didn't intend to be known as _Clow Reed_'s relation because apparently it was going to influence how the jury was going to consider their choice of a winner. It was unreasonable and underhanded, not only for the other contestants, but also to himself. The bespectacled pianist might never know if he could ever be respected for his own runner-up in the competition had been incredibly exceptional after all.

"It's a shame, _Hiiragizawa-san_. Why only now that you started participating? You could have debuted a long time ago. It wouldn't have been a problem what with your kind of pedigree."

His slack grip on his cool platinum plaque had tightened, his knuckles turning white.

"I didn't have the nerve," he answered, fighting a harsher rejoinder from escaping his mind. His smile was drier each passing second. Sadly, everything was still all about to his father, the reason why he was anyway here. He had to do it for himself, yet somehow it seemed that he was only convincing himself that.

The crowd in the offstage passed off his comment as embarrassment or even modesty, yet the most notable and the youngest of the jury, the single explanation how the other three must have known who he was the entire duration of the competition, hadn't said a word yet since she made herself known as if anticipating for the best chance to say her sentiments to him. Her flowing red hair and watchful eyes were always hard to pass by.

"That's the silliest notion, _Hiiragizawa-kun_. What was there to be anxious about?" _Kaho Mizuki _remarked with a languid flick of her auburn tresses. The woman was testing his tolerance. "A pianist should always have that audacity, or he'll never survive in this industry. Isn't that right, _Terada-sensei_?"

Even his mentor had picked up on the goading commentary.

"Music is not merely business. It's passion and commitment. In all fairness to _Eriol-kun_, he had just been bidding his time," his advisor defended him, clapping a hand on his taut shoulder. _Terada _tried to extract any reaction from him but utterly failed.

"Well, a great number of famous musicians I know had done just that. Fame is harder to come by with the inflation of talents in this generation," one of the middle-aged judges mused. The others had politely agreed with him.

A writer from one of the newspapers had entered the vicinity, taking pictures and hoping to speak to the winners, trailed closely by reporters from a local television network in _Fukuoka_, who wanted to have the same opportunity with the victorious participants. Fortunately, they got the second-placer first, and before they could even flock around him, _Eriol _had turned to excuse himself. He bowed to the judges and _Terada_ with careful detachment, thanking every one again for congratulating him, and without looking up to their faces. He didn't risk to meet _Kaho_'s questioning eyes. She might only see the uncertainty that was brimming in his gaze.

* * *

There was something unusual about him when he finally made his appearance from the backstage, _Tomoyo _noted. His shoulders were slightly slumped, his eyes unfocused as if he wasn't really seeing anything in front of him, and his mouth set in a grim line. The tie on his neck was worn loose and his dark coat a little creased. He didn't seem to look like someone who had won the first prize in a piano competition at all.

_Tōya _and _Nakuru_, who were anxious and ecstatic since the announcement of the winners, had not immediately realized the difference, probably attributing his appearance to the frenzy of winning his first distinction, but _Syaoran _had easily recognized it.

"_Eriol_!" The Chinese called out because it was not possible to get to him right away. It must have been a rare occasion that his best friend called him by his first name because the azure-eyed young man had jerked in surprise, finally waking up from his trance. The lobby was teeming with spectators and supporters that it took him a while to get to where everybody had chosen to wait.

The former heiress was convinced that something was definitely off. _Eriol _had walked up to them with a precisely trained smile, waving a plaque rather halfheartedly before announcing that he wanted to go home. Their words of congratulations came a bit short at his strange mood that finally his cousin had seen his lack of eagerness to celebrate. Something had happened in the backstage, but nobody could confront him about it yet. They made their way out of the swarming vestibule in confusion of the pianist's disposition.

_Tomoyo _bit her lower lip, unsure of how to approach him. She settled on pulling _Eriol_ aside before both of them could completely step out of the building.

"_Anō_—"

Her fingers were gingerly curled at his coat sleeve, arm stretched, and he stopped walking but didn't turn to her right away.

"I shouldn't have bothered."

_Tomoyo _didn't let go, this time uncertain about how to go on now that he had started talking.

"_Hiiragizawa-san_?" She moved until she was almost standing right beside him.

Then _Eriol _looked at her for a full minute as if considering if he should explain himself. She wanted to ask him what was wrong, but she suddenly felt self-conscious in _Sakura_'s olive dress. She was still wearing contacts for disguise, and her grey eyes wouldn't meet his sapphire ones without eliciting a shameful flush from her face.

"I really thought you were amazing out there. I think you should give yourself some credit," _Tomoyo _could only whimper the words to him in attempt to contain her marvel for his performance an hour ago.

Either he didn't hear what she said or he didn't just believe it because his torn, miserable expression was what got engraved in her mind instead as she further stared. _Eriol _swallowed and looked away, and the spell was broken just like that. The former heiress couldn't suppress a disappointed look from blooming on her face on time.

"Let's just go home,_ Daidōji-san_," resigned and tired, the pianist said, almost sighing in effect. In spite of his dark disposition and eagerness to avoid confrontation, he had deftly moved and quietly slipped his hand to hers, had entwined his long fingers with her own before he led them out of double doors.

**

* * *

A/N: **And there goes Kaho. I can't really make up my mind about her. Judging from her first appearance, I think I've made her somewhat nasty. Wow.


	33. 33

**A/N: **An attempt to explain Kaho's history. LOL Thanks so much to **Lu**,** apple **and** cheng** for reviewing. :D Two for two, I'm on fire. hahahahaha

* * *

Act 33, Winter

_Mizuki Kaho _from four years ago was already a household name in the classical music industry. She grew up in Japan, but was more familiar with England because of her further studies in an exclusive piano school. Her international exploits as a soloist at a tender age of ten had impressed quite a few piano laureates and attracted a particular celebrated musician. _Clow Reed _took her in as his first and only apprentice only when she turned twenty-one, which raised several eyebrows at his curious move because he was thought to have never even considered mentoring his own son. At twenty-five, _Kaho_ was an established pianist with awards and distinctions from important competitions and performances. She performed in various concertos and recitals, and was frequently invited to judge a number of contests.

The fact that _Kaho_, who was practically a stranger, was chosen over him wounded _Eriol _to some extent. His unscheduled sojourn in England when he was eighteen was a terrible mistake as far as he was concerned. The bespectacled pianist was sent to Austria a month prior to the stopover for his annual summer studies before he decided to see his estranged father. It had been _Tōya_'s suggestion that he try to speak to _Clow Reed _in his London home, to finally form a relationship with him because it was just about time. A few timid tries would never be enough. In spite of previous setbacks and unsuccessful reunions, _Eriol _heeded the advice after some careful thought, more confident that he would be able to make a better impression on _Clow _especially when he had been one of the few who were selected to be trained in an elite conservatoire in Paris. When he had arrived in the _Reed _Estate, the butler told him that the master of the house was in and had led the young man inside. It felt strangely foreign that he was made to wait in the receiving area, but he hadn't been living in the mansion for a while, and the butler didn't recognize him or the obvious resemblance in the guest and his master's appearances. The design of the anteroom had been altered, the young man noted. His mother used to adorn the room with an elaborate crystal vase of wild lilies sitting on a mahogany table in the middle, but right that moment a modern sculpture with hard masculine edges greeted him instead. _Eriol _grazed his sapphire eyes on the trinkets, the walls, the floor and the rest of the furniture. The apparent changes somewhat alarmed him, and he took that as a bad omen. The sound of footsteps echoed in the hallway, coming in sure sweeps toward his direction. The one who came for him wasn't his father but the English butler again, stiffly apologizing in behalf of his master, who was currently engaged with an important guest and couldn't be disturbed. If _Eriol_ needed to speak to _Clow Reed_, he would have to make an appointment. The servant's words were so flat in his ears that he made it sound like seeing his father should be a business transaction. He had heard them before, too, one time from _Clow_'s publicist and several occasions from his personal assistant. So he had left the estate, sorely humbled that even his own father, at odds or not, couldn't even be bothered to inform his son that he couldn't attend to him, who had flown to England alone to see him after seven long years. He would know later that the significant guest was apparently one redhead, whom he had already met many times. His father's utter rejection had stung and had drove _Eriol_ farther away. Consequently, he declined the chance to study in Paris, settling for Japan even if it meant having just standard education and training for his supposed genius.

Again that was four years ago. Now an unpleasant silence reigned in the _Amamiya _manor without the music that usually filled the nothingness in the air. _Eriol _had chosen not to lay a hand on the piano since they had come home that eventful weekend. Two days later and he was still a tad more somber than anyone would let on, and _Tomoyo _still couldn't figure out what it was all about.

The family physician didn't approve of his cousin's attitude, and resolved to get the information about _Eriol_'s disposition elsewhere because the pianist had refused to be confronted. Fatefully, _Terada _couldn't be reached through his mobile phone, so _Tōya _was left with no choice but to solicit _Syaoran _to speak to the azure-eyed young man.

It was still winter. The snow had promptly melted, yet it left a ghost of rime and a hefty weight of grimness all around.

_Tōya _was getting ready to leave for work, though a little hesitant to set out again after a long, uninterrupted break and while domestic quandaries needed some attending to. _Nakuru _had proposed he take a vacation, but he couldn't afford a time off, knowing that he was always wanted in the hospital.

The former heiress watched him fighting a sigh and anyway failing. He was worried, that much was obvious, however he may also had been bothered about his cousin's psychosomatic state now. The bespectacled man had been distant for days and was dangerously lapsing to a similar condition he was in after he had come back from his last summer instruction abroad.

"I know this would be asking too much from you, but would you do me a favor, _Daidōji-san_?" The doctor asked, not quite meeting her grey eyes yet.

"Of course, _sensei_." Her discomfort could be seen in the way she held her hands together.

The young doctor straightened up.

"I don't know what the full story is yet, but I think I know that _Eriol-kun_'s father may have something to do about his temper again," he said, suddenly awkward to have included _Tomoyo _in their family matters. "What I am trying to say is...don't let him give up."

"Give up what?"

"He had been at his limits once before. Though uncle's indifference have frustrated _Eriol _over and over again, he is still unconsciously bent on proving himself to him. _Daidōji-san, _if he finally decides to give up music, he will lose himself. Do you understand?"

Before the dark-haired woman could answer the question, _Yukito _had suddenly appeared to them with an uneasy expression on his usually passive face. He bowed before he said what he came for.

"_Sumimasen_. There's a guest for _Eriol-sama_."

_Tomoyo _knitted her brows in confusion_, _and _Tōya_ instinctively narrowed his eyes. Why _Yukito _would come to the doctor to announce this was rather peculiar.

"I thought I should let you know as well," the silver-haired servant told him, seemingly unnerved. "_Mizuki-san_ is paying a visit."

**

* * *

A/N: **When I said there was a surprise 2, maybe 3, chapters ago, I meant about Kaho's appearance. LOL I dunno why I am even explaining myself.


	34. 34

**A/N:** Wow. I really, really want to update like twice a week, but unfortunately, I don't think that is possible come next week. Our nanny is leaving us for good, and I am left to do all the chores! TAT (excuses, excuses LOL) Thanks to **James Birdsong**, **cheng**,** Lu** and **shortygirl333** for reviewing and to everybody who gave up some of their time to read this fic. :D

* * *

Act 34, Winter

"_Akizuki_-_san _is in the entrance hall with her as we speak."

Almost immediately, _Tōya_ darted off, passing through the connecting entryways of the common room, study room and the lobby, and leaving a more confused _Tomoyo _to ask a startled _Yukito _the necessary questions. The servant only tipped his head in one side as if in thought. It seemed that he was rather hesitant to reveal the visitor's identity, her intention for coming to see _Eriol_, or the implication of _Tōya_'s alarmed reaction.

"_Gomen Daidōji-dono_. It is not my place to satisfy your questions," he said, bowing in apology before instantly saying he had other errands to run and turning away.

The presence of this guest had stirred the young doctor from his typically relaxed attitude, which consequently made the former heiress curious.

_Tomoyo _reached the foyer and just stopped by the alternative entrance, internally debating with herself why she shouldn't sneak in this meeting. However, her stubborn interest won the mental argument. In the slightly parted doors, she spied _Nakuru _in the room, standing beside _Tōya _with her head slightly bowed and her gaze stubbornly trained on the floor. _Eriol _was a few feet ahead of his cousin and was facing the guest, whose figure was angled in a way that a part of her regal face could still be seen. Even without her stepping in there _Tomoyo_ knew that the air must have been oppressive and infinitely uncomfortable that even a few blunt words could slice through it. Everybody looked seriously rigid and, if she read it right, stunned, but nobody was talking, not even when a full minute has passed.

"What brings you to _Amamiya_?" _Eriol _broke the silence first, sounding deceptively bored despite the hard look in his eyes. He didn't bother with the pleasantries, but he wasn't particularly rude either. His cousin had stared at the back of his head as if looking too hard would make the pianist stop whatever he was planning to say or do.

Somehow the woman didn't answer his question right away. _Tomoyo _wasn't sure if she was provoking _Eriol _to snap at her or was making a purposeful pause.

"I forget how beautiful _Amamiya _mansion is at winter. It didn't really snow in the past few years, did it? Maybe it did the last time I was here." She finally spoke with a smile in her voice, equally deceiving with her unassuming comment.

Everybody knew the snow had dissolved days ago.

Unmoved, the sapphire-eyed young man chose not to rise to the bait as he waited for the appropriate reply to his query. In the other hand, _Tōya_ hated the pointless anticipation.

"_Mizuki—_"

"Oh, please, _Tōya_. Can't I be allowed to come here anymore?" _Kaho _interjected still with that smile in her tone as she tossed her fiery hair mischievously, her perfectly painted lips quirking into a mysterious grin.

_Nakuru _had visibly flinched in between the other woman's speech, and it was difficult to tell if it was because of how personal the guest with red hair had addressed the doctor or her last statement.

"Did you go see _Eriol-kun _perform? I didn't see you there."

At this, _Eriol _was finally encouraged to scowl at _Kaho_. His gaze was burning with something akin to disgust, but he really hadn't been the type to manifest too much emotion, not in this situation anyway.

"I was a judge in the contest. Surely you knew about that," the woman said, arching an eyebrow to the bespectacled pianist in effect, needling him further.

_Tomoyo_'s eyes widened upon hearing this, trying to patch up in her head the significance of what _Tōya _had said to her a while ago and what this woman was suddenly saying. Perhaps there was a connection, perhaps there wasn't. It really shouldn't be her business to figure things out, but she was also especially treading on eggshells with _Eriol _lately, and the young woman didn't like how everybody was doing the same. He was rather determined to keep everyone in the dark, pushing even his only family away in the process.

"What do you want, _Kaho-san_?" There was a notable edge in _Eriol_'s voice this time, and his jaw was more taut. His patience was wearing thin with all her stalling.

"Always the one to be straight-forward, aren't you, _Eriol-kun_? I like that about you," _Kaho _said, insensitive of his irritation. Her amusement could be clearly read in her face that even _Tomoyo _cringe at the spectacle. The air was thicker with so much tension anyway, and no one dared to budge. _Tōya _looked more stunned though than the he had been when _Yukito _first announced her arrival, while _Nakuru _bit her lip in anxiety, and if _Eriol _had been glaring at the guest, he now settled for an uninterested stare again.

"I should have known you are not going to say anything worthwhile. I am leaving," the young man had heatedly stated before he resolutely stalked to the foyer. _Tomoyo_, who was spying by the entry, should have sidestepped him before she was discovered, but she was seconds too late when she realized what was actually happening. _Eriol _had slid the doors apart sooner than she could react, and she stood there face to face with him, his shadow dropping on her like a dismal shade of suspense. She couldn't stop herself from flushing deep red in mortification for being caught eavesdropping.

The young man was equally shocked to see her there, mouth dropping in muted question. His hesitation to make his complete exit caused everybody in the room to look in their way. The former heiress could only anxiously blink.

"_Anō—"_

"Remember that _Hamamatsu_ piano competition they were telling you about? Why don't you participate in that contest? Another award will make your performance portfolio look really promising. I can be your mentor if you like," _Kaho _interrupted again, inadvertently saving _Tomoyo _from explaining why she was standing there. "The training should be to your advantage. Even if I may only serve as a substitute, it was your father who taught me a lot himself after all."

The offer and her last words, which were misleadingly genial, were meant to stab him straight where it really hurt. His eyes promptly shut close, dark brows meeting in a crease. _Eriol_ visibly struggled to recoil, yet he fell short anyway. In this dangerous proximity, the former heiress could plainly witness the barely contained agony written on the lines of his unusually blushing face, and her heart tumbled to the pit of her stomach at the vulnerable display of emotion.

"I think you have said what you really came for now, _Mizuki_." _Tōya _finally found his voice again, annoyed, and the nurse had shifted her concentration from the ground to glower at the unlikely morning visitor.

In a sudden jerk, _Eriol _opened his azure eyes again without actually seeing _Tomoyo_, fixed a blank face on, and instantly left his spot, dragging her dazed self along with him.

"_Matte Hiiragizawa-san_! Where are we going?"

Both of them were marching along the extended hallway in long strides and were fast approaching the main entrance. Despite the rising protest in her voice, the pianist didn't hear any of it, merely tightening his firm grip on her arm and trembling in controlled anger.

"Please, _Hiiragizawa-san_," _Tomoyo _pleaded as she tried to wrench her arm free from _Eriol_'s hold. Tugging proved to be a futile feat. Only when she determinedly stepped in front of him and cautiously laid an empathetic hand on his warm face did he cease from moving, as if the bespectacled man just realized what was actually happening. Never mind if her arm was twisted in an awkward angle at the effort.

"_Daidōji-san_?"

His eyes were round again when they had settled on hers, taking in all of her concerned expression like it had been the first time he was allowed to really look at her. In the last three days he hadn't been responsive to anything, and now he was reacting like he was going to burst from too much feeling. It was a demonstration of extremes that _Tomoyo _didn't know what to make of it.

They were both drawing in air from all the exertion to get to where they were now lingering.

She noted the dark rings under his sapphire eyes. _Eriol _hadn't slept much, and it was sadly manifesting.

"It's about time you tell someone what really happened a few days ago. I am your friend, _Hiiragizawa-san_. You really can't keep everything to yourself like this," she urged gently as she sustained her even gaze. He had already released his claim on her arm, but only when he nodded to what she had said did she remove her shaking hand from his face. She couldn't figure why she had to result to such intimate act because there were so many other ways to calm him down. _Tomoyo _decided that she would deal with her foolishness later. Thankfully, there was nobody in the area to see what had taken place. She would be damned if she was to go through another embarrassment one more time.

"I have to be at work soon, though." She winced upon remembering, the anti-climactic statement hanging between them like an ill-timed rain cloud. The young woman was about to head for the library when_ Tōya _unexpectedly came to speak to her.

"I'll drive you there," _Eriol _gallantly offered, swiftly opening the main door for her after grabbing his wool coat on the peg in the corner.

Warm rays of the sun had immediately traced her face before she could reject his sudden offer. Maybe it was his way of warming up to her again, _Tomoyo _thought pensively. Or perhaps it was easily the perfect excuse to get away from the house, where the commotion was probably still brewing. She briefly wondered if _Tōya _and _Nakuru _would be able to catch the next train on time._  
_

After a few half-hearted protests, she stopped fighting against _Eriol_'s idea.

They didn't talk, nevertheless they shared a comfortable silence in the entire length of the drive. The customary awkwardness that she thought would exist between them didn't even thrive, and she was in some way reassured that things were turning more hopeful.

Almost an hour later, the bespectacled pianist had practically walked her to the town library before he resolutely followed her in the public building.

* * *

He watched the raven-haired girl speak to her aged superior the moment they arrived, hunching to him in apology for being late.

_Eriol _lifted his right arm and checked the time in his watch. _Tomoyo Daidōji _was only behind for a few minutes.

The old man had only nodded noncommittally before he handed her a pair of gloves from behind his table and sent her off to do her responsibilities. The grey-eyed assistant, _Aya_, bowed to him again before making her way to the pianist, who was standing among the tables and chairs.

"My first break will be in two hours," she told him with a shy smile. "I have to catalogue the books that arrived yesterday, so I may be too busy to even speak to you once in a while."

He appreciated her tolerance with his temperamental disposition in the past few days. He knew he didn't deserve her respect or attention, not when he behaved so poorly, stubbornly desisting interactions because they would never understand why he would never get over his father's rejection even if they tried, ultimately forgetting he wasn't alone. He had his cousins, _Syaoran, Nakuru_. He had _Tomoyo_.

"_Hiiragizawa-san_?"

It was pitiful to peer at cloudy eyes instead of clear heliotrope orbs. Even so the faint glow from the window that was playing on her petite form only made her eyes seem like smoky ice.

"What are your interests?" He suddenly blurted out, not really knowing where that thought came from. He was probably going mad, but at this time he couldn't really care less.

Her face registered disbelief at the bizarre question. The way she tilted her head reminded him of a curious pet, wondering what its foolish master was up to again.

He supposed she was unaware of this endearing habit of hers.

"Well," _Tomoyo_ started with a pretty color on her porcelain face, uncertain of his intent to know. "There's the story of the twelve zodiac animals, fireworks, stargazer lilies, Rachmaninoff's music—"

She kept her eyes on his when she said that part, but looked fairly apologetic for some reason. One way or another she seemed guilty to have mentioned it especially when it was a sore topic at the moment. Yet her unyielding understanding moved him, and _Eriol_ was glad he chose to spend his day with her.

"—and cookies."

"Baking cookies, or eating them?" He asked, amused with this bit of information. He didn't peg her as someone so uncomplicated with such naive fascination, mainly because he knew that she was born from an affluent family, who managed a large textile business for a very long time.

"Both?" Her self-conscious expression made him genuinely smile for the first time in days.

"Do you have books about cookies?"

"_Hai_, they are in the homemaking section."

_Tomoyo _led him to the same bend, where he found her the night before his final competition, and showed him the rows of volumes of similar field. With another smile he said his thanks and minded his own affair so that the library assistant could finally start her work.

_Eriol _sighed to himself when the girl was out of sight. He was exhausted from all the recent events, and particularly from his father's apprentice's unexpected visit this morning. Maybe he was lucky to have the former heiress to keep him sane.

He would have to read about baking cookies of all kinds to keep his mind off _Mizuki Kaho_'s wicked grin and _Tomoyo Daidōji_'s beautiful face.

**

* * *

A/N: **Do you guys think I made Kaho a too vindictive b*tch here? hahahahaha I really hope that it gave you that impression. :D


	35. 35

**A/N: **And so a bigger problem has decided to ruin my schedule completely. I am suddenly employed in my university to teach, and I am seriously upset that it affected my mood to update sooner. I love being a bummer, really! (But I guess it doesn't hurt to earn again.) And this chapter has got to be the lamest, shortest chapter I've ever written. Sorry. :(

Again and again, thank you to **Lu**,** cheng **and **shortygirl333 **for believing in me. Because nobody else had been vocal about their praise/criticism but you, amazing people. LOL

* * *

Act 35, Winter

That sharp scent that only belonged to the freshly opened volumes briefly suffused her senses, promising her of little surprises from unearthing mysteries in the either glossy or parched pages, vivid pictures, enigmatic titles and names on the covers. Gloved hands dug inside the package, easing the books from their cardboard confinement like an indispensable liberation of sorts.

More often than not she was focused with her errands, but right then her eyes just gingerly fixed themselves on her only companion as he made his way to the reading area again.

It was highly amusing to see a grown man gather several books about baking. _Eriol _didn't seem like the person who would even be interested in flat cakes or the diverse measures of how to correctly create a particular kind, yet there he was, flipping to the next page of the first illustration book in his hands and looking more and more distracted at the colorful presentations. He had taken his place nearest the large, textured windows, where the filtered lighting was neither blaring nor muted.

_Tomoyo _didn't think he'd even spend his time like this, because he was usually productive in his activities, studying music theory or rehearsing piano pieces, but she supposed he had no better use for it at the moment. If he stayed at home, he still wouldn't play the piano and would only mope in his room, doing nothing but just lying on his bed with his back against the door. He coped with distress like that, she observed sadly, and regardless of it all, he looked physically restless and strained. One time he resulted to abusing his cat, _Suppi_, by teasing it endlessly with a mouse-shaped toy hovered beyond the pet's reach. In spite of this choice of amusement he had been anyway absentminded all throughout the episode, and _Suppi_, as if realizing that nothing fruitful was to come out of the activity, eventually got frustrated and bored.

There were at least two huge boxes with the newly-arrived books about economics, languages and interior designing that needed to be carted to and sorted in their corresponding files. She set off to work on them right away, grouping the interior designing books first, which should be conveniently stacked near the podium that overlooked the neat rows of reading desks. Her employer had gone out to transport older prints to the next community library and to exchange them for newer copies, while her co-worker was on a scheduled day-off, leaving her in the building to quietly work on her own.

Her thoughts promptly flew back to the azure-eyed man in that lonesome corner as she was slipping a hardback on a vacant spot just a little above her head. He was probably still leafing through the same book with that absorbed expression on his pale face, a short pile of similar tomes right beside his lean arm. She really wouldn't know what he was doing now that she had her back turned against him, but she couldn't help her curiosity.

So she peeked, which was actually the second colossal mistake of the day, because now she had to be caught red-handed again. His thoughtful eyes were not on what he was supposed to be reading but on her. It looked like he hadn't been too attentive with his book for a while.

In her shame and surprise, she self-consciously let go of the book, fatefully dropping it on her head, the crashing sound of a hardbound colliding the hollow wooden platform resonating throughout the old building.

"_Itai_..."

She knew she earned the punishment for being too curious, but she wished payback didn't hurt this much.

"_Genki desu ka_. Should we put some ice for that sore spot?" The tone of his clear voice was marked with concern, yet there was also hilarity laced in it.

_Tomoyo _cursed in her mind, still rubbing the top of her head even if the pain had already significantly dwindled. If she stopped doing it, maybe all the blood in her body would rush to her head, and she'd be too red in the face that _Eriol _would notice. Never mind if he was really about several meters away from her.

"But all the snow had melted," _Tomoyo _vaguely answered, coloring anyway. All the hair at the back of her neck were standing in humiliation.

She turned to see the pianist staring at the book in his hands again as if he never even moved since he started reading, a phantom of laughter and contented smile on his lips. There was no sign of the bitterness and torment that had deeply marred his face earlier.

The former heiress smiled to herself, not really understanding why she was happy. She assumed that _Eriol_'s entertainment would always be at her expense, and it was alright because she didn't, wouldn't mind at all. That instance in the practice room where he had laughed at her profuse apologizing was a distinct evidence.

The fallen book, which was in fact lighter than it appeared, was set on its intended place before she went on meticulously organizing the others, the faint hum of _Norihiro Tsuru_'s Last Carnival serenading the only connected souls in the friendless library.


End file.
